I was diagnosed with breast cancer a week before Xmas. After my OPP to remove cancer I was told it had not spread to my lymph nodes ? but the cancer was bigger and stage 3. I am now waiting for results from Oncotype DX test which I will get the 24th Feb. I am so scared of the results and the waiting seems to go on and on. I try to stay positive but this is all I can think about every day of every hour. I am daze all the time
Hi Sam
I am very new to this site but now glued to it reading all the messages that members send to each other. They are all really caring, understanding and give you hope and support. Stick with it and the messages that you will receive are heartwarming.:womanvery-happy:
Hi Sam,
I’m sorry you have had to join us, but welcome to the forum. I was diagnosed on 29 November with a grade 3, 3.7cm aggressive tumour. I had a mx on 13 December and they found that it was 4.7cm, but no lymph node involvement. The waiting has been horrible, at times I could hardly breathe and my heart would hurt and I was so frightened. But, I would come on here with my fears and although I have never met these ladies, they would comfort and calm me.
The fear will subside, once you have your treatment plan, I promise you. I always knew from when I had the biopsy results that I would be having chemo and rads, so I never had to wait to find out. In fact, I have only just got my appointment with my chemo nurse today, so hopefully I should get started soon. Not that I want chemo, but I do so want to get on with my life.
Sending you hugs and my tough pants (which we wear when we need them).
Susan x
Thank you so much. Did you score high?
Thank you Susan xx I know the feeling of not being able to breath, I thought it was just me stressing myself out. X
Hi, this is my first post, I just started looking at the site today. I had 2 small lumps in one breast found during a routine screening in December. I had a mastectomy 3 weeks ago as my boob was too small and the surgeon said that if he did lumpectomies there wouldn’t be much left! I found out last week that there were cells in 1 lymph node so they’re talking about Chemo. I have to see the oncologist in a week to get details of my treatment plan. I’m frightened, stressed and anxious and I’m not sleeping much and not functioning very well. It’s good to know that this forum exists and other people are feeling the same. I’d be really glad for any thoughts or helpful suggestions.
hi Nicky,
Welcome to the forum, although I’m sure you’d rather not be here.
There are many other women going through what you are going through at similar stages to yourself, so do come & chat whenever you want to & look at the other relevant threads such as ‘going through treatment’ where you can get support as well as support others as you feel able to.
As the others have said, what you’re feeling is entirely normal at this stage, but it does get better when your treatment plan is in place.
do take care
ann x
Ann and Silverlady, thank you both so much for your replies and support.I feel such a mess and it’s so nice to know it’s not just me and it will, hopefully, get better. I don’t seem to be able to think of much else at the moment and am having trouble sleeping. I should get my treatment plan next Tuesday so I’m hoping things will seem more settled then, I was OK with the mastectomy and the thought of radiotherapy but the idea of Chemo has knocked me for six. RaitchR i do sympathise, as everyone says waiting for results is horrible.
Hi, I have been recently diagnosed, found a lump 2 days before Christmas Eve, When I went for the opd was told that it was just a dense shelf but they would do a mamogram and scan to put my mind at rest. There was ‘something’ small on the scan, 8mm, biospied and was cancer. It was very small, got early, for lumpectomy then 3 wks of radiotherapy. At next opd, it was bigger than first expected, margins not clear. Had further surgery this week and DCIS is borderline 21. I have opted for chemo. I may need a mastectomy depending on the results of this last surgery. Rollercoaster of emotions, I find myself comforting family and friends, saying everything will be fine, now I know what I am facing, I can cope with this. I have so many questions about chemotherapy I dont know where to start
Good to hear from you Elmward though, as everybody else has said, nobody wants to be here. It sounds like you’ve been through a real rollercoster of ops results and emotions. You sound very together though, although my head knows what’s happening I’m still really stressed about the whole thing and not able to think about much else. If you have any thoughts on how you’ve got to a calmer state I’d be really interested to hear them. I guess you’re still waiting for results although you know pretty much what your treatment will be?
Hi Nicky and Ladybowler,
I dont think I have reached a calm state yet, I swing from numbness, like denailability to sheer panic. I am a nurse and I know what is coming my way but this knowledge plays havoc within my head. I cope better when I know what is happening and then I can plan. I feel that I have to be strong for my husband and youngs boys yet I know that they are trying to be strong for me, I wont cry infront of the boys and am trying to think that I have finished crying infront of my husband, but I know this wont be the case in the coming weeks and months. Medical evidence tells me that this will be ok, tough but ok, yet my head is saying all kinds of things. I am trying hard to stay within the evidence. I have looked at the chemotherapy thread and have questions ready for my consultation at Christies with my oncologist. I was just searching mindlessly when I found this forum, reading the emotions of others is helping through this, xxx
Hi Silverlady, I’m glad you’re feeling O.K and thanks so much for letting us know, it is reassuring to hear from someone going through it. I started reading the threads on the chemo treatment forum and got a bit bogged down and depressed with all the problems and things that can happen so it was really good to hear something a bit more positive. I have the meeting with the oncologist on Tuesday so should know more then about how often, when i’ll start, etc. I had a better day yesterday but more stressed again today and not sleeping well. I’m not sure if I’m just being pathetic about all this.
Nicky
Hello ladies,
I was diagnosed with breast cancer on Thursday. Waiting now for an MRI scan so that treatment can be decided. One question for you all, what have you all done about going to work between diagnosis and treatment? I’m not sure I can face everyone. My job is very stressful. I’m the boss. I can’t deal with everyone’s pity as I might just curl into a ball in the corner of the room. And yet I have to tell them because I’ll need to put measures in place to cover for me when I have surgery. Would be interested to hear how you have managed this.
hi Ali,
Sorry you find yourself here, but welcome to the forum.
I decided very quickly to go off sick in the initial diagnosis period, purely because my job involves dealing with vulnerable people, I was unable to concentrate & it wouldn’t have been fair, as well as having multiple appointments to attend.
I found it helpful to talk to senior trusted colleagues first to get the ball rolling, arrangements have to be made, so my feeling was it was best to get on with it asap. My colleagues also told others as needed, so that it was not down to me. I was also referred to occupational health as part of standard procedure.
Everyone differs on their work needs, others prefer the distraction, some have little choice but to continue, so go with what you feel you need to, to get through it.
ann x
Ali and Lindyloo
Hi and welcome to the forum, although it is not a place that any of us would really want to be, but you will find loads of help and support on here from the wonderful ladies across the whole of the forum. when you know your treatment plan, it might help you to look at the Going Through Treatment thread as you will find lots support and help on there.
I had a tubular grade 1 estrogen positive cancer, op in Oct 16, rads dec/jan 17 which I finished on 19 January. I had 6 weeks off after my op but this was because my employers made me have that time off, they organised an OH referral so that they knew how to provide the best support to me to get me through this. I went back to work in November and worked throughout my rads, but that was my choice and it was a milestone I set myself, all on the understanding that if I was having problems doing it I was to tell them and take more time off, but I was only doing 3 days, 4 hours a day which the OH was all they would recommend at that time. I have now returned to my normal working hours this past week.
I didnt tell my family, although several people at work knew, because my mum is elderly and I did not want to tell her until I knew exactly what I was dealing with, at the time of the op I didnt know if I was going to need more surgery or what, so I wanted to make sure that when I did tell her I was giving her the whole picture. She was not happy with me but understood eventually. When I told the people at work I said it was good bad news, bad in that it was cancer, but good in that it was totally treatable and the type of cancer I had had a good outlook, which I think helped in how they dealt with the news and their reactions to me. They have been totally supportive throughout and have been a godsend.
I hope that this might be of some help to you and not too longwinded.
Sending you both hugs
Helena xxx
Hi Ali, I found it really hard telling people and have only told some people still. I’ve talked to other people who didn’t find it difficult and just told everybody so, I guess, it’s just an individual thing. I worked through the initial tests up till a couple of days before my mastectomy but was very stresseed. I told my immediate boss first and she was very supportive and we agreed that I’d tell my immediate group of colleagues during a routine meeting. Unfortunately a couple of people weren’t there so I had to pull them aside and tell them separately which I found difficult. They were upset but supportive. One of my colleagues and friends has, with my permission, being telling people at work I don’t know so well and passing on news which has been very helpful.
I haven’t been back to work since my op and finding out I’ll almost certainly have to have chemo. I have been thinking about it but I’m not sure I can face it. I’m waiting until after Tuesday’s meeting before deciding what to do.
Susan thanks so much for the support and sharing your experiences, it’s made a big difference hearing from other people going through the same thing.
Nicky.
Hi all, I was diagnosed last Monday with what I’m not sure I am due back tomorrow for resultimate and treatment plan. I’m going absolutely out of my mind with worry I feel like I’m having panic attacks. In my head I think I can deal with it if it’s treatable but it’s the not knowing of if it’s spread thats killing me. I have two young boys and it’s terrifying me to think I may have to leave them.
Hi Nicky and Helena,
I will know on Weds if I need a mastectomy or not and will get my referal to the oncologist to start chemo in the next couple of weeks. I couldnt tell my mum and dad, nor my two boys, my husband had to do it, I also asked a colleague to tell people at work. I dont think there is a right or wrong way, I did what felt right for me, what I could cope with at the time.I have been back to work since my diagnosis and inbetween both surgeries. I really hope that I can work during the chemotherapy, I think I cope better at work. I do honestly feel that this is not happening to me, that I will wake up from this or when I see the oncologist he will say that I dont need chemo. Its like a waking nightmare that just keeps on going
Hi all
I was diagnosed with Grade 2 Invasive Ductal BC last Thursday in 2 areas of the right breast, however the results of the lymph node biopsy were ‘inconclusive’ - I’ve learnt to detest that word after I had some issues with microcalcifications in the same breast 2 years ago. So its still early days for me. I went back to see the consultant today and I’m pleased to report that the prognosis is really positive. It seems oestrogen is my Kryptonite too - as its a strong ER reception one, so its Tamoxifen for me (so far!). I’m booked in for a mastectomy and reconstruction on the 16th March. However, I’ve never looked forward to going under the knife so much (does that sound strange???). I’m literally counting the days off the calendar.
In terms of my feelings since diagnosis, I’ve been so positive (I’ve even scared myself). I admit there have been moments of denial, but not many tears, which is unusual for someone who cries at One Born Every Minute!! :smileylol: or the RSPCA adverts!! I guess I seemed to have found some inner (hidden) strength. I reckon its still going to hit me at some point though!
I’ve also kept working. As its keeping my mind busy (so making the week go quicker). Work colleagues have been great, really supportive. Plus, I figured I’d need a few weeks off post op. The Breast Cancer Care website is a fantastic resource to have and I’ve found out so much info. I wouldn’t normally join forums, as quite a private person. But reading about other people’s experiences of BC is really helping. So, I just wanted to say ‘hello’ and its comforting to know that I’m not alone out there xx
Like you just diagnosed 3 days ago -work is a great distraction