Hi Pam, I think it’s good to eat red meat. My body is certainly craving it! Gotta eat what body tells us to… Anna
Den if it gets worse in night get to A&E if you have to for anti biotics…I know that’s a complete pain but you don’t want to get really ill. I’ve had quite a rapid heart beat sometimes I’ve noticed on this tax. By day 12 I’m normally up and about but have spent the day pinned to my bed. Thanks for all your supportive comments. Boiler fixed and will email bosses tomorrow. I’d like to give benefit of doubt but won’t be surprised that they are trying to claw back money. Feel like just a commodity these days. Definitely eat whatever you’re craving I’d say. Have gone off chocolate all chemo until this one! When my mouth was gross it kind of disguised the taste. Ate two whole packets of choc decorations meant for the tree…whoops!!! Xxx
Good morning! Hope you get sorted today both Den and Rachael! These sweats are gross aren’t they lol, never knew my head let alone body could get so hot then cold in the space of seconds! Going to need new whole bedding and bed after all this at this rate! Chest spasms gone, just lower back now, same as last time, which lasted a couple of days, it’s like Groundhog Day in chemo world,?,
Anna I’m like you, anything steak, beef or just basic carnivore and I’m there lol, if my body wants it then I’m eating it, so get that steak on Pam!
I’m definitely knackered on the Tax, it’s ok, I’m going with it, but going to drag myself into Chelmsford for a bit this afternoon, well that’s the plan as I lay in bed right now! Hope your hand is ok PaulS, and everyone else is ok, not sure whos got treatments this week so let us know, so hard to keep track where everyone is at!!
Lots of love xxx Sam
Morning Sunbeams, good luck to all (temporarily) poorly and knackered Beams, here’s hoping the awful fatigue/pains/infection all on its way out now. Enough is enough, and as you say Sam, it feels like Groundhog Day quite a lot of the time right now. I’m emerging from zombie state finally. Should have a good week now, then they hit me again next week! Down we go … and up we come again! Gotta stay strong and focused. This sh** treatment is truly brutal, but that shows it’s working, and that they are giving us enough. I’m going shopping, really looking forward to getting out and seeing folks. 
TTFN, Anna
Morning everyone
Rachael I’m shocked they have cut your pay, its pants!! I’m not sure how I’ll get by when mines is, its already tight. If you get a good day could you pop to citizen advice to see if entitled to benefits or a higher amount to bridge t gap… So unfair, payroll may have made a mistake… Sending big hugs!
I had a period each month on FEC, now on T I’m not sure what will happen… I’ll also have tamoxifen after treatment. Are t effects of tamoxifen just tempory to our cycle??
Is freezing here today… I feel like a ‘bag lady’ most of t time in wooly hats, scarves and layers of jumper lol, roll on t summer!! I’m trying to rock the boho look, but not pulling it off well!! 
Hope you all have a lovely day, muchas love,
Lou xxx
PS. I have a picc line and have t shower cover from Hosp. It is a rubber tube with a small hole one end and larger other (for upper arm) its really stretchy so I pull over picc without touching it. Has never leaked only prob is drying it. My dad cut a plastic coat hanger so was left with short ‘arms’ like a mini coat hanger. I hang it on there to air n dry properly so not germy. Xx
It seems that the school business manager has put the wrong date down for my pay??? Awaiting confirmation but could have done without the shock! Thanks guys. Managed to Hoover and wash floors today…house a disaster!! Breathing so laboured with tiny exertion !!! Xx
Eve beamers
Had chemo5 today, Tax2. All went well. The Registrar refused to prescribe steroid tail despite the nurse trying her best. Ah well. Staff in the chemo unit just amazing as usual, so much respect for them all.
Home now and a bit apprehensive about the next 10 days, but confident I can do it! Too much on to be too poorly.
I send an update email to friends, family and neighbours the night before each chemo. I had some lovely replies today, nice kind words which are so lovely to receive.
Only had 3 hours sleep last night as Dex raging around. Hoping I can beat that tonight, I’m soooo tired.
Made a lovely new friend in chair next to me today. I was telling her about the exercise class for ladies who’ve had breast cancer. It’s called Beat It. She thought I said “Be A Tit” hahahahaha. A LOT of laughter from Bay2!!!
Got my date through for final chemo. It’s going to be 2 January. Yay for Christmas and New Years Eve
You guys are all lovely. Sorry I’ve not replied to you all, so much going on. Will try to catch up this week.
xx
So pleased Peegee to hear that you now have no 5 out of the way - and love the laughter in the chemo room! My no 5 is Friday and I’m also having no 6 on 2nd January so we can share how things go! I just want it to end! Let’s hear it for 2015 when we will all be finished. P x
Morning Beamers, Rach I hope they sort it out ASAP, if only that “'manager” knew what hurt and upset they had caused by there mistake eh, but not a clue!!
Well done on number 5 Peegee, and I think ‘be a tit’ has a nice ring to it, lol, very funny, I’m day 8 of tax 2, like you Rach if I do anything fast like run upstairs my heart races and I’m not running this cycle, my body says no! If fact my body says do as little as poss so I am, did too much on first tax and that’s not good, feel better than last time already, dog walking is my aim of each day and that’ll do nicely thankyou ?,
Your hands sounds painful PaulS, lizard indeed, the joys of this!
Hope your dizziness has subsided Anna, and Den got sorted with antibiotics!
Enjoy your steroid whizz bang if you can Peegee, no idea why they had a problem giving you the tail, it’s daft the completely different rules and regs at each hospital!!
Have as good a day as poss ladies, I’m just going to take my tramadol and lansoprazole and have a pint of tea, lots of love xxx Sam
Morning beauties, glad you are powering through the Tax sessions, knocking them off the list and getting as much done as possible, albeit with lizardy hands, weedy legs, sore bottom, antibiotics (I hope so Den) and so on and so forth. We deserve a medal for putting up with endless cr*p (not to mention some really stoopid colleagues and managers). Bit dizzy again today, seasick swaying feeling; will report it at clinic on Thursday when i go for my Dolly Parton. ‘Be a Tit’ is ringing round my brain, it’s so daft…gotta laugh! Off to eat a huge healthy salad with an old friend, will be farting all the way home hopefully. Love to all, have a nice day walking doggy, and being busy in the crisp cold, love Anna XXXXX
Afternoon Ladies hope we’re all starting to feel Christmassy now. Met up with some friends yesterday for lunch. The first of many haha!
It’s tax day 5 and I’m not feeling too bad at the moment a bit achy and tired. Still not finishes the present shopping yet seems to be going forever. Have done the majority on line though.
Thanks for the drink ideas enjoying ribena by the pint. Flushing thoughts toxins.
Off to watch my sons drama show tonight hope I’ll be able to sit through it. Will take a couple of paracetamols before hand. Have a good evening people. Cx
Glad you’ve joined me on the Ribena, Char!!! Last few days before the next tax…had a bit of a panic, realised I’d forgotten to book my blood test, oops! Got a bit told off by receptionist for leaving it so late.
Thought I might do a couple of nice things today and tomorrow, out and about, but I now have daughter off from school coughing incessantly and snotting everywhere, so it looks like I get to stay at home and do nothing instead **trying hard not to be resentful**. Christmas avoidance has come to an end, we made some baubles from foam balls and glitter…it’s everywhere!! Good fun though. So wishing for a bit more energy and enthusiasm, can’t believe how run down I feel, and this is me at my best, hahaha.
Good luck to all those of you trying to carry on regardless, despite horrid SEs. Keep popping those pills!
And Rachael, thank goodness that was just a mistake, phew.
Love to all, Ness xxx
Hee hee, the randomness of our threads does tickle me!! Pam I’ve heard others have thrush as a SE, because of antibiotics and general chemical balance out of sorts, easy enough to treat so mention to doc,
I feel your " hide the resentment and smile" Ness, ?, made me chuckle, just go with it and relax, make the most of it, this won’t be forever, at least it’s awful outside, makes it easier to hibernate!!
Xxx Sam
Oh Den, lots of love and cuddles to you, wrap up and stay warm, thank gawd you got to hospital and got sorted, it seems like **bleep**e now but you’ll be on the up soon enough, can only do what you can do, get lots of rest love, thinking of you, xxx Sam
Den sorry to hear about your stay in hospital. Hope your feeling a bit better now. This is a very scary time for us all. But we are strong and will get through it together. Chin up!
A good 6 hours sleep for me seems to be the norm now. Manage to sit through my sons play. Really enjoyed it. Today is the youngest’s nativity. Another day closer to Christmas really need to write my cards. Have a good one!
Oh Den, so sorry to hear you’re having such a crappy time, you really don’t need it do you? I completely know what you’re saying about not being ready for next chemo, but just think the sooner you get them done the sooner you can start getting better xxx
Daughter still off school today, looks like there’ll be more xmas decs by the end of the day, she’s discovered Kirstie’s Handmade Christmas!!
Deep breaths everyone, we’re getting there, slowly but surely! (Off to take own advice, hahaha)
Ness xxx
Dear Sunbeams,
Poor Den, that is really miserable, sending you hugs and get well soon. My onc said that on chemo we have a 1 in 8 chance of an emergency admission, and that not a lot can be done to prevent this apart than the obvious avoiding really sick people. Neutropenia can strike at any of the cycles, and thank God you went to hospital and go the emergency treatment you needed.
Thrush is a right royal pain in the ****. I’m guessing its best to go to docs rather than use over-the-counter stuff, and at least its free then. I heard that it is common in the mouth, esp if you are prone to ulcers. Fingers crossed on that one. Poor lady garden.
Having over extended myself yesterday (pathetic isn’t it?), I am back on the sofa with the ugly blanket, watching the wild weather. Am definitely going to go down to the sea later, probs half the beach will be up on the esplanade and teh waves will be amazing. Fretting a bit about returning to work, first week in February and wondering what rads is going to be like. But surely it’ll seem like a walk in the park after chemo? Guess it’s better not to get ahead of myself.
Have a good day, keeping cosy and getting into Kirstie’s handmade christmas. Am wondering what the blasted kittens will make of the tree when it goes up at the weekend, and whether they’ll choose to shred it or just climb it! Love Anna XXX
Yeah I know what you mean PaulS, I have been reading that hormone therapy has a list of SEs and menopause-like symptoms that don’t look very nice. But like chemo, not all of us wil experience all of them/and not at all the same time. I guess we will become the experts at managing any side effects and I’m sure there’s stuff out there to help us. However, I say bring it on! I’m massively reassured that Tamoxifen or suchlike will stop this fecker from returning…it’s been around for a long time, so results are very clear and my onc is convinced that Tamoxifen is going to be the future for all at-risk women.
Blanket is very scary - dark, gothic and hairy!
Must get off the computer, must stop browsing property porn, mmm chicken coop would be nice…TTFN, Anna.
Right sunbeams
Back to my social life. I have til 3pm to make a decision. HELP!!!
I am Day3 Tax and so far feeling fine, just a bit weary and lazing in bed. Last cycle the pains began on the night of Day3.
Tonight I have a ticket to see Paul Heaton in London. As a HUGE Housemartins fan in the 80s, I really want to go. I have a lift there and back (1.5-2 hr drive possibly).
Obviously SEs could kick in at any time, (poss slight chest changes started already?) Feet and ankles could start hurting tonight. But, what if they don’t and I’m sat at home wishing I’d gone?
What about immune system? Ok for one more day?
What’ll I do? I’m literally 50-50 at this point.
Thoughts?
xx