Well no wonder I was feeling like crawling away to nice Reiki tent by the lagoon - I have just popped to see the GP and been told I have shingles! Just waiting (oh our favourite game!)to see if that means that chemo no.2 will be delayed(due Monday)or I need to go for blood tests to see if I am neutropenic. At least it explains why I have been feeling so rubbish this week, and strangely that makes me feel a bit better!
Jane - so glad that the Hickman proved to be worthwhile today!
Shingles! Thats horrid. Hope you get over it quickly.
I am pooped tonight, moved over to mum and dads for a few days as its just me and my littlest boy rattling around in a big old house together…
Dinner being cooked for me and a glass of wine on the way… Thats better…
SB
Shingles sounds nasty! No wonder you have been feeling rubbish. Hope it doesn’t hold things up for you.
I’ve got the wig out today to give it an airing. I do like going commando though, it feels nice and airy. The family are used to it now. I’m just waiting for an order from annabandana so I can be covered up in style. DD just bought me some false eyelshes. I think mine are hanging around the woods somewhere, but I have some eyebrow strands, the grey ones of course.
Just waiting for dinner to cook but a glass of cool cava sounds refreshing. Note to self, put on shopping list.
Glad the tax was ok Jane.
See you all later in the JM for a Breast Angel (new cocktail recipe) Not decided what should go in it yet. Any ideas welcome.
Please please help me, totally lost, just had hair cut so very upset im in floods
Sorry Silvershar, its bound to be a shock as you have such beautiful hair. Such a sh*t disease for the things it does to us. Now is the time to focus on beating it and getting your life back to how you want it to be xxx
but how, iv been fine as can be, coped with scans tests operation etc but thru it all i looked like me now i look like a stranger it is the hardest ive dealt with since dx how do i adjust i look awful. at least i coped and looked the same me but now thats gone im totally lost please helpxxx
Oh shar ((((((hugs)))))) to you, we all find something just toooooo hard, for me it was buying clothes at size 16 I cried for 2 whole days when on my own. I did say how I felt to several people but they didn’t seem to see how bad it was for me. The thing that helped was finding out from onc that I am suffering from chemo related fluid retention so hopefully some will come off after treatment.
This is temporary but it is so awful to lose parts of your identity be it hair, cleavage, nails, slimness or being a together sorted assertive female, god this really really is a sh!tty disease.
Love to you Pat
Oh Silvershar
sending you a big ((((hug)))) losing my hair was truly the worst part for me , which sounds so vain , but it was I just broke when i was going through that part. Every time I walked past a mirror i would be startled byt this stranger looking back at me. Sending you strength, hang on in there
Rhian xx
Oh Shar, I am so sorry you are feeling upset. You have taken a massive step, so really really well done to you. You have taken control of the situation and you should feel really proud of yourself for that! Sending you lots of pats on the back and big big hugs! My best friend is a hairdresser and she cut mine for me. We both had such an emotional time of it but were really proud of ourselves and felt like we had kicked cancers ass!
Projectwoman- sorry to hear about the shingles, that’s so not fair. I take it that you are a project manager- think I saw that on another thread, about process mapping. Me too! Hope you are better soon and can get on the FEC train asap. (had mine delayed by a week
too)
Lisa xxxx
this is the worst bit please help me im sooooo lost
thanks Lisa I was lucky i have know my hairdresser for years and years and she came to my house but im feeling cold and vunerable, my trade mark tresses have gone its gonna be so hard to face the world an my mirror
Hi silvershar
I am sorry to read that you are feeling so low, please call our helpline in the morning for more support, they may also be able to put you in touch with a peer supporter who can help you through this difficult time
The number is 0808 800 6000, 9-5 weekdays and 9-2 Sat
Take care
Lucy
Silvershar
One of the girls that went through treatment around the same time as me had long long hair and she got a wig from the start and just wore it all the time she simple couldn’t face shorter hair. Have you looked at the wig option x
thank u i feel so stupid so vain but my hair was so long and is so thick it was “me” now i feel nothing
You will cope, have a cry, have a drink. hug the beautiful baby in your profile piccie.
You will find the strength you will
r
Hi again
In response to Rhian’s suggestion I am posting a link to the BCC ‘hair loss and breast cancer’ publication which you may find helpful to read as it gives ideas for coping with hair loss:
Lucy
Shar,
Don’t feel stupid, you are not! and vanity is allowed. I had my roots dyed the night before my first chemo, how vain is that?. You will find the strength to get through this, look how far you’ve come already!
Shar you are so not stupid, we all define ourselves in different ways. Losing the thing we define ourselves by is a really hard thing, you will need time to greive your loss and come to terms with a different you, not necessarily the one you know and love.
Rant, rave, cry, post here whatever it takes, this is NOT easy, don’t feel bad about it, do whatever, keep talking, on here, to the helpline ( they are fab I’ve used them several times). If you are really upset now, talk to the Samaritans ( I’ve done that too in the night when only they are open, they will chat for as long as it takes).
The best thing is that you don’t bottle it all up, you are doing what you need to. Best wishes coming your way
Pat
Shar so sorry that you are feeling so low after being so brave in getting your hair cut - I was thinking of you this afternoon wondering how you were getting on. Well done for getting through the cutting! It is only natural that you feel sad after losing such beautiful hair, but I hope you feel better very soon - big hugs x
Well at least the WBC fairies were with me and my blood counts are fine so I didn’t need to be admitted - the chemo team just changed my anti-virals to a much stronger dose than the GP prescribed.
Lisa- yes I am normally a project manager too - sadly relegated to a back seat for the moment, just taking exciting tasks like designing reports, and trying not to interfere too much with my temporary replacement!
Lisa Pat and Lucy thank u so much, Horace and I just chatted thank u to u all, i am gutted and am on the red wine i knew i would be upset but im worse than i thought so vain but trying to process the info in my head that im lucky etc ect but my mirror is looking at me in horror whose that girl staring back,god why am i so vain thank u so much for ur support cud i phone the helpline in the morn after blood test? Shar x