Standing outside the dark, dark woods.

Public Archive
701

Hi Everyone,

URGENT help required !! I have somehow wandered away & am lost on another path through a different woods that i dont like that is FULL of majorwobble fairies & i need you to come get me PLEASE, they are pulling me down & I need to get back up & find positivethinking, bringiton & all my lovely friends as at the moment i have worrymyselfsickabouteveryache&pain & shouldiofagreedtochemo.

Will wave my lighter in the hair & bang my last 2 beer bottles together, please try find me.

Sarah.xx

702

Look out for me on your way back from finding Sarah please?Wee bit of the collywobbles.
Startin Monday 3 fec then 3 tax then probably 3 weeks radiotherapy.
I’m knitting a purple waistcoat but not sure about the merkin.
Not good with ladders either - maybe I could stay with the foot soldiers?

703

Just as well I’ve just turned up for the night shift to light all the torches and scare off all the gremlins.

What’s up Sarah, why are you down tonight? You know you’re going to get through this and come safely out of the forest. As Choccie put it, this too will pass. It seems like a long time now but we’ll look back on all of this in a year’s time and we will all be healthy and we will wonder why we were all so scared. Keep on plodding along the path and the trees will start to thin. The gremlins will all be gone soon. They don’t mess with the Breast Angels. Cyber hugs xx

Mary, I know it’s not a nice thought (I’m pretty cared myself at the thought of finding out on Friday that I need chemo) but I look at all the campers on here who are getting through their chemo and coming out the other side. You can do it and you won’t be on your own, we will be with you virtually and you have friends and family who will rally round. Could you maybe do something nice to take your mind of it tomorrow?
By the way purple is definitely my favourite colour. Maybe you could knit the flag for the treehouse while you are on? And then the merkins (can’t be that tricky though I’m not sure my local wool shop would have a pattern. Maybe you could go into yours tomorrow and ask?) xx

704

Sarah, I think it’s because your number’s not up yet. I do think you need to have a word with the mods and get yourself changed to that Beverley Hills postcode, it’s much more glamourous.

I’d love to come and look for you but I’m up to my knees in the Limbo swamp again, and only my darling daughter’s fundraising event is keeping me from going under completely. I’m pretty sure my wellies have disappeared to the bottom of the swamp, never to be seen again.

Majorwobbles are a particular nuisance, and I’ve noticed they do tend to form flocks and gang up on solo travellers. I shot a couple of them down when I met up with Peachez earlier. I suspect she’s now hiding under the duvet, but it was lovely to meet you Peachez, and not a pink or a sparkle in sight!

Listen out for all the banging and crashing (and not a small amount of swearing as the hammers hit the fingernails instead of the wood nails) and you’ll soon get your way again.

One down, one fewer to have in the future, Sarah.

Quick, I can spot her waaaaay over there. Can someone please crochet up and emergency line to throw into that pond on the edge of the wood, I think she’s fallen in.

Right then, I’m off to my pit. Lack of sleep’s not a good thing.

CM
x

p.s. I have found a place with great patterns and ideas: theanticraft.com/archive/beltane09/mermaidkin.htm

705

Coming to rescue you Sarah but please do not wave your lighter in the HAIR or we may have to call the fire extinguisher elf and you will be bald before you start…!

706

Choccie…where on earth did you find that website,we will be collecting seaweed and tridents soon ;))

707

Sarah, I’ve just struggled out myself (including shouldieverhaveagreed), but there’s solid ground just over here and I’ve got my feet on it now. If you can’t see my red face shining in the darkness, I’ll light a scented candle or two. Here’s the end of my fleecy blanket to hang on to, and can you pass a shawl or something to Marym? I’m braced against a tree, and bringiton and postivethinking have arrived overnight to help pull.

Best news for a while: the guy who was scanning my heart with the kind of ultrasound device that many of us know so well commented on the lack of fat over my ribs! (Good thing he wasn’t scanning my lower abdomen.) It’s been years since I’ve been told any part of me was skinny. He also apologised for having to press on one of my scars and asked me to tell him if it became too painful. What a sweetie! (A younger doctor, he had to get a technician to show him how to angle the scan just so between ribs to get the bottom view, but I don’t begrudge assisting someone’s training, even if things took a bit longer while the tech delivered a short lesson.)

Here’s my hand and the snuggly blanket–ready to be pulled out?

Cheryl

708

CM- have to agree with you that lack of sleep is not a good thing, having clicked onto that link. If I ever get to the point in my life, where I start crocheting the equivalent of a pubic tea cosy, AND believing that others might want the pattern and uploading it onto the web…Well, let us just say, I hope that day never comes.

Been fighting the wobbles myself this week, having always viewed this site as a bit of a haven, stumbled into a link related to calculating survival rates. Aaaaargh, don’t do it I told myself as my finger punched the key to the handy link. Too late! Pandora’s box.

Anyway, am off to erect a large electric perimeter fence for us (think Jurassic Park), I shall of course, put our coat of arms above the gate…Hee, hee, best foot forward girls - Sarah, have replenished your beer store too,
Tracey xx

709

Morning all! Glad others were on hand to lend a blanket, shawl and keep al our campers safe.

Tracey, somewhere back in the real world I do statistics. It bugs me how averages and percentages are stuck out there mainly without anyone saying what the population size is. There are thousands and thousands of people diagnosed with bc just in the UK let alone the world. So 1% might be tens or even hundreds of thousands of people and whatever percent survival could be millions of women (which sounds much better than a number less than 100%).

As to averages, don’t get me started!! (except on average everyone has one leg and one breast or testicle resectively just because someone somewhere has one leg etc and it brings the average down (on the basis no one has three pf any of the above to balance it out!!) Step away from the dodgystatistics gremlin while I blast the little whotsit to bits.

Treatments and prognosis goes up all the time so they are probably wrong by the time they are put up there xx

710

I hope you’ve all got your crochet hooks at the ready, ladies, there’s a market out there for this, I’m sure of it!

This one’s even better! I have hooted over this website, and it’s all thanks to the business brains on BCC looking for a new opportunity. 90210, you clearly need something to get your mind off it, and I think knitting would be just perfect for you!

theanticraft.com/archive/beltane09/dentata.htm

I particularly like the last instruction.

“Wearing:
Affix to bare skin with spirit gum, or add small loops to the top corners and wear on a chain or belt.”
I am sure some of our mastectomy ladies will have some of the prosthesis tape they can hand around. Happy knitting!

As for what I was looking for, I think I put something like “knitted merkin patterns” or similar, and it really didn’t take long to find. Much safer than googling cancer survival statistics, don’t you think?

711

Position googly eyes as desired! I know a fair few men who would have googly eyes if we turned up wearing these :wink:

Quite agree on the stats Choccie. I’m going to be positive today (sings with fingers in ears) “who cares if i need more surgery it will only take a couple of weeks, chemo is six months out of a lifetime, drugs are to keep bc away, boobs were saggy anyway, bringiton, bringiton” xx

712

…will raid local Bell Towers for rope, then we can make a basket lift to the tree house – no ladders. We will also be able to wave torches and spotlights from the top so Sarah and MaryM17 and anyone else feeling lost, can find their way back to us easily. Presume we are still doing tents and yurts though, for those that don’t like heights and as we do want to get out of these woods one day! There’re meadows and flowers and sunshine out the other side, smooth paths, no pits or swamps, a light spring shower once in a while maybe just to bring on a rainbow… it’s just we’ve got to get through the woods first…

MaryGrace, I agree with you totally, there are treatments now that have not been round long enough for the type of 30+ year predictions we want! In fact they stop at 10 / 15 yr survival as they jsut don’t bother following up after that, doesn’t mean they’re not out there.
And who knows what might be out to help us in just a few years time. Stats can never give a personal answer, one day I hope we don’t think about it so much . There was a good article (in New Scientist I think) recently as to how cancer treatment was going to be control of a chronic disease within a short time…
Choccie, did you notice the purple dangly earrings? Just imagine your swamp is only knee deep! Will pull you out with aforementioned rope; I have spare wellies under the stairs in various sizes (left over from Narrow boat rallies), what size are you?

Now I slept exceptionally well following Fec2 yesterday, and have not been sick so far, now I have the expanding waist imp teasing me instead! Can anyone diet while they’re on Chemo??

713

CM - The website is fab!! I roared with laughter but disappointed that we were aren’t as original as we thought!!

Now then, there seems to be an awful lot of bad feeling in the woods at the mo and i’m not having it! Me torching the I’mGoingToDieTent probably didn’t help as now all the horrors that were contained in there are now roaming around. Soz. Hopefully the security fence will keep them at bay.

But please remember this: We all have moments of WoeIsMe mainly because this bl**dy cancer has crept up on us and hijacked our lives. But the difference between us and others is that we are doing something about it. Some of us, like me, have no choice but to have chemo, others have had to weigh up the pros and cons about having it, but the main thing is we are doing it because we know we have a future. We know this is a temporary blip in our very long lives.

Statistics for me have gone out of the window - according to stats my profile says i shouldn’t have cancer, but i have, so i don’t really care about stats anymore. And besides, if the odds were against me getting cancer but i got it surely that means other odds that are against me have also reduced- thinking winning the lottery, getting a book published, etc.

I am leaving the building of the treehouse for today and am patrolling the woods with flame thrower, security blankets and rope to pull people out of swamps, then we can all go and get drunk and sing our anthem (don’t know what it is but feel we could be creative here)whilst i raise the 2-fingered salute.

Think this new skinhead look has quite literally gone to my head!

Come on girlies - ‘Merk Up!’

714

SCACO lol !! Visions of you patrolling woods astride large motorbike with flame thrower in one hand, ropes slung over biker jacket.

So maybe we need a lottery syndicate and I’ve always wanted to write a novel. It came to me the other night that this is all great stuff for a plot: Working title “Walking through the dark, dark woods.” Starring characters remarkably like us all. There has to be a lot of black humour and - of course - a tear jerking happy ending! x

715

Hi campers
Statistics scared the pants off me when i was first diagnosed so I ignore most of 'em, focussing on the positive ones. here’s a thought; They wouldn’t spend all this cash on us if they thought we were going to peg it in the near furture now would they! The Bringiton fairy left her little Youcandoit acolyte and also the Onedayatatime sprite which keeps me going. Chemo is not the best fun I have ever had but not as bad as I thought it might be. After 6 FEC I got tired, and now realise just how tired I was as I am recovering my energy a bit on weekly Tax. It is worth asking your onc to go on weekly tax if you can, its as effective as 3 weekly but the SEs are not so bads. All i have had so far is heartburn, which is being managed. You don’t get the rollercoaster of the white blood cell crash, which causes tiredness. The only drawback is hospital once a week. I would rather have that than feel pants for 2 out of 3 weeks. I have been up and at 'em for the 3 weeks I have been on this poison. However, the Housework fairy has left the building and the Haveagoodtime fairy has taken up her position chez Crab.
I knit whilst waiting for appts. On my second pair of socks now…
x sarah

716

PS: Choccie, any joy with those results yet? I know you are sweating on them, feel much the same, so fingers crossed for you a) getting them b) getting the results you want x

717

Afternoon campers,

Am back !! thank you all for helping :slight_smile:

This thread is such a help, everytime i read the latest posts i cant help but laugh & as for some of the images that i am conjuring up in my mind … Am loving being a Breast Angel :slight_smile: working on a theme tune as i type.

We all should REALLY turn this into a novel when we get to the other end of the woods.

Am loving the Tree House & Zip wire & definitely up for changing my name CM although may struggle with knitting & crocheting is there a lesson tent anywhere, i need also to stop telling Oh that i am having a “Meerkat” knitted for my lady garden & learn correct word !! that was a note to ones self )

Am well & truly on count down to chemo now, have been to dentist today to clean & sort teeth, hairdresser & eyebrow lady on Saturday & 1st Scarf from annabandana has arrived today although i have to admit i have already broken into the sherbert lemons & cola cubes :frowning: will be putting them away after £120 dentist bill though !!

Tracey, thank you for the beer & to everyone else for the hand holding, fleecy blankets etc, was a real help.

Well best go get back on my bike, leathers are on, flame thrower in hand & a look of determination that will stop ANY gremlins in their tracks (you dont get to be a Breast Angel for nothing !!)

Love to you all, will catch you in the beer tent later :slight_smile:

Sarah AKA 90210. xxx

718

What do you mean, Bev, a dentist bill? Surely you should be able to flash your prescription card for that one! (I think so anyhow, give it a go.)

Crabbie, why on earth are you knitting SOCKS? I’ve given you a place to find a pattern, surely you can do better than SOCKS!!! It’s good that you’ve caught up with BringItOn and her chums.

There’s a huge crowd outside the media tent now, I was doing my stuff again yesterday. (Norberte, HBCM very nearly mentioned her dyke chum but thought leafy Surrey might have found it all a bit too much on top of the talk of feeling yer bits…) here’s the latest installment.
bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/p00d83qn/Sarah_Gorrell_02_02_2011/ at around 2:07:30

Ellie’s fundraising has gone nuclear. Now has over £2,000! I’m completely gobsmacked. A friend’s mum’s friend is a professional photographer and is going to take pictures of before and after, and stick a link to it on her own website, it’s just astounding.

We’re now thinking about possibly putting on a music event at a local club here (other daughter is at school with the child of someone who owns a music venue so it should be do-able) so we’re having a bit of a think about who we can get to perform and how to market it. We think that the proceeds for the concert should go directly to BCC, because of all the support I’ve had from you lot and the publications that are given out at the hospital. That doesn’t come free so BCC could do with a bit of support in return for the support I get here.

I’ll keep you posted, but we only came up with that idea about half an hour ago so it’s not got any shape at all yet, just a few random ideas rattling round. Could be good fun as well as good fundraising.

MG, the Results Monster is still on the missing list, I’m going to have to send out a search party. Legs still very muddy from the Limbo Swamp but thanks for pulling me out.

Oh, do you like the avatar? I finally figured out how to put it up, so you get to see what got sent to Little Princesses. I’ll change it in a couple of days once I’ve got used to the lack of a plait, so you get the chance to compare the Before with the After.

And now to spend a good couple of hours wandering around the forums to catch up. I’ve been AWOL today as a very good friend drove up from Cornwall to do give her son a lift and rather than just wander round aimlessly, she spent the day with me. Now nursing sore sides as we did a lot of laughing. Terrific tonic. Sadly no gin in it, but a delicious lunch and a sneaky pint of Pride has put a warm glow on the day. Then we went into school to listen to Ellie’s assembly that she’s putting on for all the year groups and I had a very hard job keeping dry-eyed.

719

Happy Chinese New Year to us ALL, I’m hoping the fireworks and dragons will keep all gremlins at bay tonight.

I’d better leave the crochet/ knitting to all the experts we have as whenever I do anything with either a crotchet hook or knitting needles my mum has to rescue me! At 84 she’d probably laugh like a drain and have a heart attack if I told her what I was attempting to knit!

We could always build gangways up in the tree tops like they did in the Robin hood film, so we don’t have to come down and meet the gremlins?

I’m wondering if there’s something in the water or the moon cycles at the mo as we all seem to be having the wobbles this week, I’ve joined Sarah in the shouldIhavechemo swamp and the Isthecoldcapagoodidea gremlin has been buzzing around my head all day.

Still, the thought of purple merkins with googly eyes has certainly cheered me up, so Thank You everyone once again.

lots of love
Helen xxx

720

CM - WOW to Ellie!!! Ace. We’ll have her up for some award as best child of the year before you know it - who does she most want to meet? There’s always a celeb or two hanging around, and then we could all muscle in on it with our Breast Angels leathers, beer bottles and crewcuts, smoking fags and spitting chocolate buttons… hmm. Best hope Ellie wouldn’t pick Justin Bieber…

Seriously, brilliant news, and she deserves a massive cyber hug from all of us xxxxx

Can stand quite happily at bottom of trip wire and act as cushion for you all… but would quite like to do death slide too, so elevator looking more important. I have stupid phobias… wobbly ladders, but not cliffs… snakes, but not sharks…lol

Sophie xx