Starting Chemo in December.2012

Today was day 5 of FEC 3 and complete HELL.
I tried to escape by writing the blog post :
Practicing the Ars Amatoria via Sun Tzu’s ‘Art of War’: today’s post on chemonights.blogspot.co.uk/
And now I’ve come on here to post it and I stupidly just read the thread about what Tamoxifen does to your nether regions, and to your sex life. The Horror, the Horror. And I’m going to be taking Tamoxifen for 5 years, after the chemo and the rads are over.
I DO NOT WANT TO DO THIS.
Reading what those women are going through just freaked me out completely - if that’s what Tamoxifen does to you, then I won’t be taking it for very long.
How come ALL the treatments are torture?

Mornng all,

Maire - I enjoyed the LGFB workshop, even though I don’t really wear much make up at the best of times, never mind when I feel like sh*t and my skin is all dried up. I missed half of it cos my Onc appt ran over by 2 hours. And she had just told me that I needed more chemo so I had been crying. Despite all that I enjoyed it, had a laugh with the other ladies and was by the far the best looking girl on the bus afterwards. Anyone who has not been - the goody bag you get to take away is legendary. Book now! I am sure this will make you feel better Maire - I really hope so.

Cybele - It truly is beyond rubbish. I wouldn’t get Tamoxifen so I can’t identify with that bit, but a stack of chemo has pushed me into premature menopause anyway and who needs/wants granny fanny??? It may be wise not to read too many threads as they are the people having the worst experience - that’s why they are on here. I do know some ladies who are on it and are not having such extreme sfx. Anyway - just remember they can’t make you - you can try it and then you can run away to India (or Turkey).

I actually feel a bit better today so I want to do something productive, I just can’t think of anything as I have been so unproductive for so long. What is the piont in me? I have made an apptmnt to see the false boob woman tomorrow as Silicone Cilla was meant for a pre-rads me and now I am a different shape, what with the “thickening”. Oh Gawd, it is all very horrible. The best thing for me to do will probably be go to the shops for Turkish Delight.

xxx

Hi All. I’ve just had a call from the hospital about my blood; it’s not up to scratch and they want me to come in early to have another test before FEC 3. Oh hell, please don’t let it be put off, I don’t think I can bear it. At least they looked at the results before I arrived.
I’ll take Turkish Delight with me in case I need to sob and console myself at the same time.

Hamley - if you having Monday chemo does that mean your bloods were done on Friday? They will have come up over the weekend. They come up quick. I will cross my fingers (I can’t feel them anyway) but you should be fine. I know a lady who changed her chemo day to Tuesday cos she got sick of this situation. x

Hi Crackers,
I’m looking forward to the LGFG session. I don’t wear much make up either and have sore eyes but think it’ll give me a boost. Going to my daughte’rs parent’s evening afterwards so I wil lbe some sight sporting Cher the wig, Tammy the hat and full blown tranny make up!!!
Cybele -I’m as worried as you about Tamoxifen and feel like having a full blown tantrum about it. I do not want to have all the oestregen sooked out of me. Will give it a go but will def give it up if it makes me miserable.
Hamley -Fingers crossed for your bloods.Iif they’re not up to scratch try to view it as a wee chemo holiday. You’d feel awful if they fec’ed you and you weren’t well enough.
Cress - you sound a bit low. I’d def stock up on goodies and treat yourself. You are having a pretty rough ride.
A word to the wise -I became a bit complacent about taking my omeprazole. I woke up at 4a.m with the most awful heartburn. I swallowed 2 pills and later some gaviscon but almost 8 hours later, though bearable, I’m still getting spasms. It was so bad I could feel the pain in my back as well as my gullet. So be warned. Take your prescribed sweeties even if you feel fine!!!

Hi. Thanks for the support. I’m back from the hospital now and it all went OK in the end.
Cress, I did have my bloods done on Friday and you were right about the quick recovery once they start to recover and mine had just come up enough for me to have the cycle thankfully. I’ve also taken your point concerning the lady who changed her day to Tuesday and done the same myself, the chemo nurse said she thought that was a good idea.
After all that’s been said on this thread, I asked the nurse to use my left arm (my good arm) for the cannula which she was happy to do, although she did let me know that they would use my right arm if it was necessary at some stage, I hope it won’t be. Previously they have just used my right (bad) arm, so I’m glad to be wiser.
I’m off to get comfy on the sofa and watch a film now, I shall also be eating Turkish Delight.

I just completely lost it yesterday. day 5 always nightmare emotionally as well as physically.

Was up at 5.30 am taking nausea meds, still feeling so rotten, mentally ans physically - in the end took Lorazepam at 9am and it just knocked me out. Only woke up just now becasue the phone rang.

The last few hours were so much more bearable UNCONSCIOUS. Even if I don’t sleep tonight it was worth it.

R keeps reminding me that in a few more more days I will feel human again, and next week we can do sometihng nice.

Got to hold on to that.

His birthday on Wednesday, my birthday on Thursday

Happy Chemo F**** Birthday…

SCREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM

sorry, hope you’re all doing better than I am xxxx
soon it will be spring and we will be DONE xxxxx

Come on girls! Smile! Remember chemo is DOABLE! well at least thats what I’ve been told!!!
Very pleased to see the many references to Turkish Delight. I firmly believe its brill for raising neuraphils, combating fec/taxatere side effects and generally making you happy!
My daughter has just been to the orthotdontist. If she wants braces its gonna cost nearly £3K!!!
I had better do the lottery or its wonky teeth for her! Maybe Turkish Delight would put it right. But then thats less for me!!! Bad idea. wonky teeth it is!!!
x QDTD

Come on girls! Smile! Remember chemo is DOABLE! well at least thats what I’ve been told!!!
Very pleased to see the many references to Turkish Delight. I firmly believe its brill for raising neuraphils, combating fec/taxatere side effects and generally making you happy!
My daughter has just been to the orthotdontist. If she wants braces its gonna cost nearly £3K!!!
I had better do the lottery or its wonky teeth for her! Maybe Turkish Delight would put it right. But then thats less for me!!! Bad idea. wonky teeth it is!!!
x QDTD

QD, at this point in my chemo experience am beginning to realised that ‘doable’ is ONE OF THE BIGGEST EUPHEMISMS OF ALL TIME.
It’s very doable whwn you’re unconscious, I find.

Awake, not so much…

Not at this stage of the chemo cycle, anyway.

I keep thinking, I had a life, once. WHERE DID IT GO?

Hi , hope you can give me some advie. I’m one of the January jems ive just had 2nd fec on Friday I’m using cold cap and on the 18 th day after 1st fec hair started to shed, ive lost a lot and my scalp is very painful. IsIs there anything i can do to ease the pain. Also how oftn do you recommend i wash and comb it. Hope you can help.
love
Pat
xxx

Hi Pat,

I have put for you below the link to BCC’s Headstrong service were you will find lots of help and information regarding hair concerns. If you want to talk to someone in confidence then please do call our freefone helpline 0808 800 6000.

breastcancercare.org.uk/node/1154095

Take care,

Jo, Facilitator

Thank you jo .x

‘They shoot horses, don’t they?’ :

today’s post on chemonights.blogspot.co.uk/

Hi, I can’t get to sleep at all. Poo. I hope you’re all doing better than me because I feel horrible and I know I’ll dream of needles and syringes tonight, or rather this morning! If I ever get there.
Cress, I hope your booby appointment goes well, hopefully it’ll make you feel a bit less rubbish.
Maire, thanks for your kind words and support, at least I’m half way through the chemo even if I’ve got a long way to go with other treatments, it’s the bit I was most dreading.
Cybele, congrats on having a lovely oh whose so good at helping your through this, it sounds like you need it.
DQ, I ate TD at 4.30 this morning before my tastebuds decide I won’t like it for a while. It’s the only thing thats been good in the last 24 hrs! I can’t believe £3k for teeth straightening! My orthodontist forgot to charge me many moons ago when I had mine done. Try to stay under the radar!

Yesterday hubbie came home with a huge bunch of flowers, “because you had such a rough weekend”, this made me start to to cry, and I am still having difficulty stopping. I hate it when people are nice.

Hi Pat

my scalp was painful and very itchy. I found simple soap and aveeno cream worked. mind you i also had my head shaved so whether it would work on hair I dont know.

I also prescribe 3 x turish delight per day!

QD x

Pat-Hope your head isn’t too sore today. I did find my scalp felt sore and tender before my hair fell out but it passed. I didn’t use the cold cap, not sure I could’ve tolerated it, but it really does seem to make a difference. At the 'looking goo’d session yesterday the woman next to me had great hair and she’d been using the cold cap, though she said had lost some hair.
I would urge everyone to book themselves onto this course. It was very relaxed and all the staff were incredibly supportive. I’ve come away with a huge bag of full sized cosmetics-all well known brands. So it’s worth going for that reason alone. But, also, With full make up on, I did feel better leaving than when I arrived. Not that I intend to put the slap on every day but at least I know, if I make the effort I can cover up the old, sad chemo face.
On the down side, on day 12 heartburn started-thought I’d dodged that bullet! It has been pretty bad and is still ongoing despite popping pills. Feel pretty washed out. So this chemo has not been as deep a trough but a wider one. I just hope it’s not the herceptin.

Hi and thank you for your repliesreplies…my scalp seems to hurt morewhen wearing sleep cap so didn’t wear it it felt much better. l have lost lots of hair since no2 fec and have small patch at front and round ears …im sad all the time since no 2! Dont knowwhethr to chance washingor combing it.
Heart burn how awful ! what are you taking for that? it seems we all have different se. My sore throat is starting again as it did with no1. Back to temperature taking.
I have booked in for look good thingy , hope I can get there asit falls on day 4 after 3rd fec and its a hour trip on londons underground.
Turkish delight is on its way …hope it hasnt got to be GINGER…sick of ginger.
Thank you very much ladies. All tips greatly appreciated.
Lots of love Pat xxx

Pat,
a friend of mine did the cold cap a few years ago and she got some bald patches but kept a covering of hair. It’s grown back really lush. So even if you lose a good bit of hair, you might have some covering when your regrowth starts.
Also on the sore throat front, I had one on and off through my last few chemos and I just kept gargling with salt water. Cress on here advised it might be one of those chemo things.
Good luck with the looking good course. having said that, if you think you’ll be a bit under the weather then you could reshedule. Some of the woman on my course had completed their chemo.