it seems we all having a horrid weekend …i am not enjoying the picc line …i feel like asking them to take it out …it still sore still bruised 
and like the rest of u friends and fam say im here and blah blah blah but they dont no how ur feeling when they saying u brave and yes u got to keep it in …i no my period is not helping my moods but i am really fed up and feel like saying no to the chemo xx
Madmax, let me give you a HUGE BIG HUG. Never say sorry for sounding depressed. we have all got good strong arms and shoulders to lift and support you. You and your mum should maybe consider councelling. If it works, great, if not, at least u will have tried. We are a tremendous bunch and I am so proud of how we get on with whatever comes our way. Love, Pauline. xxx
Beautiful sparkly diamonds that you all are - thank you for your support, knew I could count on you guys, if not my family, to be there. Seems we are all having a crappy weekend this time round!
I think, Elli , you’re right in that we are strong women, all of us, and people assume we’re ok cus we’re not shouting for help every 5 mins. I’ve always been independant, largely through having to be and also through choice. never wanted people to view me as needy. But this kind of flips it all on its head, cancer. Doesn’t it? I hate admitting to being needy, especially emotionally so, but I find I am more so. It really is the emotional support I need. My OH is being brilliant, bless him. I demanded a blu ray player so he went and bought one (slightly selfish reasons for him too, especially as it came with a new surround sound system which wasn’t on my shopping list, so he didn’t take much persuading lol); took me to an aquatic centre and rehomed two of his fav fish so I could have another tropical tank full of pretty nice fish… Giving me hugs when I’m grumpy (which is often at the moment!). His sister is also being a sweety, texting or calling me most days for a chat to see how I am. So I am lucky to have them and you all.
Your other words also rang true Elli - like, ok, this is another curve ball I’ve got to deal with (after also having had a trying time last year) but when will it end? When will we get some good news/luck??! I remember telling my boss the news and his words to me were “well, I don’t know how many mirrors you’ve broken recently Emma, but if anyone deserves some good luck, it’s you”. Just waiting for my lottery ticket to come in lol
Madmax & Pauline - what a tough 12 months you guys have had. And now facing this… Your strength is amazing. Sounds cliche but is true. And anyone else who has suffered like this… Life really is a box of chocolates isn’t it (sorry, watched Forrest Gump last night!)
Thank you all so much for being there ladies, I feel privileged to know you all
Hope your day improves - mine will be spent on the sofa. Feeling really wiped out and had really bad stomach cramps all night. Time to get the lactulose out I think!
Love and biiiig hugs to you all, precious diamonds xxxxx
morning chicks. Think we all need a bit of cheering up so here’s a few funny things people have said to me since bc. Firstly, my surgeon said to me just before my op ‘oh, you’ve lost weight, that’s good’. Well it would be if I didn’t have cancer! My last hairdressers appt for a cut and blow dry, told her I was starting chemo next week and would be losing all my hair. Afterwards she said to me “shall I book you in for six weeks time then?” I felt like saying to do what, polish my bald head? Bless, people just don’t think sometimes, do they. But the funniest thing was when I was having my heart scan, the radiologist asked me if I was pregnant - quite flattering I thought until she explained that they now have to ask women in their fifties and even sixties! Weird! And there was me thinking I must look much younger than I am. Oh well, never mind. Have a good Sunday everyone. Xx
Well done Kath, for the humour xx
I find so much of the journey funny. Situations the people. It’s good to step back and be amused… I was asked to right a blog for my friends and most of the comments are about how funny it is… Because as well as being awful, it is at times hilarious…
My friend is coming over today to shave my head. I look like a 100 year old lady with the thinning receding wispy hairline, bald patch at back… From sofa and bed but hey I can’t see it. The house s just covered in hair… Well bedroom and upstairs.
I’m going away to Lancaster for a few days and can’t go with my hair… Don’t want to go without it. My good friend will be so upset doing this for me and I feel bad about that… But she is indeed a good friend for doing it and not running a mile.
I’m a little worried what my other friends kids will make of baldy me… ( the ones I’m going away with) I don’t think I’ll be able to use the pool… Unless you ladies have any ideas about head covering lol…
Thanks to all the chicks for the support. God only knows where I would be without you all. Emma, you made me laugh with your Forrest Gump quote. Probably just as well we never know what we are gonna get next! But its good to off load. Aahh…that feels better. Love, Pauline. xxx
Well done Elli about getting head shaved. What a good friend you have. Have a nice break, and dont worry about the kids comments, they will have been no doubt warned, but hey, if they do, it will be a minute wonder, then forgotten about. Hate to say this, but I was told no swimming or takeaways because of risk of infection. Anyway, have a lovely time. Hope everyones backside is behaving!. Love, Pauline. xxx
I didn’t think I’d be able to swim… Was going to phone and ask. I guess the baldness has taken care of that. Lol… It is quite ugly to be honest. I was hoping for a Sionaid o’connr wow moment but went from looking like a 100 year old lady to a 100 year old man lol… Never mind just need to keep it covered lol. I have got hair maybe if it all falls out it will look better…
My friend is amazing, always there for me. I know that she will have been crying all morning heartbroken for me, but turns up with clippers, wine and chocolate lol… We had a laugh about the go faster stripes. Lol
I haven’t found losing my hair all that distressing, getting it cut short broke my heart lol… Then. Loved it. It’s been more annoying more than anything falling out, all over the place. Even getting it shaved… Not pretty… Not upsetting tho. Finding this a bit wierd lol… I’ll likely be bawling my eyes out over something ridiculous tomorrow lol.
Hope everyone is doing well… Love elli x
Hi chicks we are all beautiful inside and out . Its not what the view is like, but how you view it. Stay strong. xxx love Pauline.
Does anyone know if you wear the cap thing with your wig if your bald or just with hair…
My wigs quite jaggy… But it could be my heads tender…
Elli xx
Hi Elli wear yr cap with yr wig. Remember to lay yr fingers horizontally across yr forehead (either,3 or 4) ti get yr natural hairline. Tip from salon. love pauline. xx
Hi Elli the wig place told me to use the cap while you still have hair to stop it slipping but you don’t need it once you have no hair - the wig should stay in place without the cap then
Love Yvonne x
yes i was told that hope u chicks are good im get my hair shaved a week after my first chemo i think if i do it i wont feel as bad xx
hi chicks has anyone heard off hanna how she doin? xx when i have chemo on the fri i will b staying with my mommy so wont b on here till the tue after xx nite chicks xx
Hi Elli, my scalp was sore and tender, so I used the cap but once that settles it should be ok. xxx
Hi Chicks is anyone else using the cold cap? I was sure a few of us were trying it but I can’t remember who!
I was just wondering how it was going I’m due my 2nd chemo on Thursday (providing my wretched bloods do actually come up!) and wondered what anyone else was experiencing hair loss wise. I have very minimal hair loss to date - not sure if that is a good sign or if I just haven’t reached the time frame for hair loss yet!
Hope everyone is ok - good luck everyone having treatment today!
Yvonne xx
Morning chicks,
Yvonne, I am using the cold cap. My second chemo is on 13th, so just waiting! I have not had any hair loss yet, but it is too early for me, I think. I keep thinking I can feel things in my scalp, but may just be imagining it…my mind is crazy at the moment. What did you think of the cap? I found it quite tolerable after the forst 10 mins, so not too bad. I seem to be getting some energy back, but am trying not to over do it as that fatigue is crap when it hits.
Have to go for an echo test today as I am going to be having Herceptin later.
Hope everyone has a good day,
love and hugs, Rosey
Great big hugs to all my friends who have had a downer! Hope you are feeling chirpier soon.
Can’t believe how quickly some of you are getting FEC. I was 3 hours plus. It wasn’t a problem. I think my unit likes to dilute the drugs and put them in slowly to reduce chances of damage to veins. At least that was what I was told. I think they are very cautious as the rest of you on fast delivery seem absolutely fine.
To those of you using cold cap thought I would give you the encouraging news that I am not using it and 2 1/2 weeks after 1st FEC have only a few wisps left.
Have to go for my bloods today. Will let you know if drinking wine has damaged my liver lol! Yvonne, can’t believe it. I had toothache over the weekend. A hole has appeared in the side of my tooth. Hope it hasn’t messed my white count as FEC 2 is on Wed.
Well wore my wig around the house yesterday and it didn’t fall off! Got used to seeing this stranger in the mirror. Going out in it today. Not sure whether to call it Rod because the style is like Rod Stewart’s hair, or Geri because the colour is like Geri Haliwell’s. Named my prosthesis Rosie because she is nice and pink. Anyone else as daft as me?
To everyone having chemo this week good luck and minimal SE’s.
Hugs Lynn
Hi all
Third day after first chemo and feeling very achey but seem to have a little more energy this morning. I mustn’t overdo it though. Went for a short walk yesterday morning and felt physically and emotionally exhausted for the rest of the day. How much do you lot do just after chemo? Do you get to nearly normal within the three week cycle?
My post on Saturday, day after chemo, seemed to take over a day to arrive on the board. Is that just because I’m new?
Dreading my hair falling out but know it will happen. Onc wouldn’t allow a cold cap and the type of chemo I am on (6 x Tax) seems to basically guarantee hair fall out. I have bought a wig ready that I think I will be able to get used to but it will be like looking at a stranger in the mirror for a while. Also been advised to buy false eyelashes which I have never used before and will be a whole new experience!
Pauline, I am still trying to drink a lot as it definitely helps me feel better but I must find something more interesting than water as I am so bored with it!
How many of us are diagnosed with breast cancer just after other bereavements! My Mum died suddenly 18 months ago and I know she would have had a terrible time dealing with this so perhaps it was meant to be. My Dad is very practical and helping in what way he can but isn’t really any emotional help.
Love to you all
Karen
morning chicks. My hospital doesn’t use the cold cap. Not lost any hair yet and been washing it every day, but my next chemo is due on the 10th, so probably will be losing it by then. Was going to shave my head, but no need yet whilst it’s not falling out. Lynn you make me laugh with your wig stories, mine is also a def shade of orange. Sure it wasn’t that colour when I tried it on in the shop, but come to think about it it was rather dark inside! Will have to get some tops in a co-ordinating shade! Xx