When my hair came off my OH said I looked like lenonard fron catherine tate ‘me dear bald dear no dear’
Yes its looming over us next cycle of chemo and we all know we will feel yuk , but its only for 6 or so days. Don’t know how we can psych up for this I was referred to an hypnotherapist by my local Cancer care , not started the therapy yet just had informal chat with him. From what I can gather I will be helped to visualise and feel, things places that make me happy, which is supposed to release feel good hormones… When I start getting anxious ,as I am re next C it will help put me in calmer place.
I’m desperate as dreading that awful crap feeling.
Also hoping he’ll make me wake up thin attractive with hair and a large bank account.!!!
Maggie x
What a motley crew of fat, bald people eh? And aren’t our nearest and dearest evil in comparing us to such ugly characters…
I so relate to that feeling of dread waiting for the next lot of chemo, Lostinfrance and Maggie! Only thinking about it causes my stomach to start producing acid. I kid you not.
Waiting to get in the chemo ward for my last round I understood what is like being a kid who doesn’t want to go to school. I would have had a tantrum if it wasn’t for the fact I was scared of being committed to the mental ward…
By the way, welcome to the thread Lostinfrance. I like your cow! She looks very friendly…
How do we psyche up? If only I knew! Perhaps thinking that every day that goes by is a step closer to the finishing line? And the thought we might be feeling like s**t but it’s because the bastard cancer is getting booted out of our system…
VERY difficult.
I think I’m on a rollercoaster of emotions. I can be in floods of tears 5 minutes after having a laugh and cracking a joke. A wreck, I tell you. Physically and emotionally.
But at least we have each other,eh ladies? It’s a huge comfort. To me at least.
Lulu X
You’re right Lulu. It IS a huge comfort. I hate the fact that no one around me knows how horrible this is. When I feel OK, theres still that dread underneath, and the fat, bald old bag in the mirror.
Having you lot to talk to makes me feel less alone.
Hikimmie you are filled with lots of emotional at this time you hav to let of steam ive lost count how many rants i hav had be kind to yourself i heard yoga is very gud for relaxing take some time out for yourself do something that you want to do this is your time now im sure family and friends will understand how upsetting this is 4u dont beat yourself up about it you have enough to deal with take care
Well Ladies,im having a really down day too,not sure if its se’s of tax or just the whole bloody thing. One left but that isnt even making me feel happier. I cant have tamoxifen or herceptin as triple neg so thats niggling away at me big time. I havent gained any weight,feel like ive lost,not been drinking alcohol because just dont feel like it and mouth has been awfull so FECked off! Hardly any eyebrows or lashes now too.
Your so right Jo,no one knows how we feel and i take some comfort knowing im not alone,ive got you lovely ladies who understand all this shit!
Rant over,thanks!
I’m triple negative too. It’s scary. Were your lymph nodes clear? To be honest, I don’t think about the future, positive or negative at the moment. I think I will once chemo is over, but right now, getting through the next chemo is as far as I can look.
Life as I know it will (hopefully) recommence in Jan.
Night all. Hope even those of you on steriods get at least a little sleep.
Hi Jo, I’m with you on not thinking about the future at the moment [also triple neg], but am afraid how difficult that’s going to be once all the FECing about is over. Have been quite sick with it so far and been gradually losing weight since diagnosis. My oh can’t resist saying Ahh Grasshoppa [from Kung Fu] when he sees the bald head and I’m Gypsy Rosalie with the scarf [better than Svetlana the Polish potato picker that I think someone mentioned on here!]. BB
Uhhhhh Busybee! I’m not sure about your Gypsie Rosalie being better than my Svetlana…ha ha! Perhaps they should meet,eh? But then again Svetlana NEVER leaves the home (ok, she does when it’s potato picking season but def not at the moment with this snow). It’s chic Lilly, the sophisticated one with the wig, who ventures out and foxes everyone into thinking she is well (if only!)
Without anything on my head my son has said I look like Ripley from Alien. Another character to add to the list of fictional (and not)bald people mentioned on this thread. The truth is I can’t BEAR to look at myself in the mirror without something on my head!
My OH had the “unsavoury” idea yesterday of taking a picture of me fat, naked and bald to remind ourselves of what I was like right in the midst of the cancer bullshit (like Lisa Lynch calls it. And by the way Claire, thank you for recommending her book. I LOVED it!). EHM! WHAAAAT??? NO! I definitely don’t want to be reminded. Thank you vey much! And before you jump to conclusions he ain’t a perv, don’t worry. He is only trying to help me…Honest! But the camera will be banged on his head if he ever even TRIES!
Claire, Jo, Busybee and anyone feeling terrified…one day at a time seems like the right tactic to me. If we think of what MIGHT happen to us we would be all in a corner rocking and dribbling. Let’s get to the end of this shitty chemo road together. That’ s also my immediate goal.
Onwards and upwards girls! We are all here for each other. All going through the same. Boy it helps!
Lulu X
Morning all
To right Lulu onwards and upwards one day at a time. I’m getting a bit like Pollyanna looking for something to be grateful for each day. Don’t want to dwell on the 13/12 date of next C as my tummy does somersaults at the thought of what’s to come. Agree no one can quite understand this unless you are going through it, I’m also glad of our little chemo gang.
Just finished Stieg Larson millennium trilogy books this am really enjoyed reading them took my mind of this BC any body recommend any other good reads?
Maggie x
Oooh, don’t tempt me Maggie. I’m an English teacher, remember? My favourite book of all time is The Handmaid’s Tale. I’ve loved it for 30 years. All bow down to the genius that is Margaret Atwood.
My Nodes were clear Jo which is great i know,my prognosis is good,im just a born worrier! Was having a really bad day yesterday but feeling better today after a half decents nights sleep,positive head back on!
Glad you enjoyed the book Lulu,i couldnt put it down…
Need another book so might have a look on amazon and order The Handmaid’s Tale Jo,been doing alot of reading.
Loving the nick names all your OH’s are calling you,makes me laugh
Love Margaret Atwood too! ANd I have read the Stieg Larsson trilogy. Was disappointed by the third one but really enjoyed the first two.
Well, Maggie, I can recommend a book I’ve read lately with my book group. Everyone enjoyed it greatly, including myself. It is called The Help by Kathryn Stockett. Brill!
Lulu X
P.S. Claire, i was going to recommend you read a thread I saw yesterday about a lady like yourself diagnosed with triple negative BC, now five years on but I see you have found it.
Claire, I know how you feel. On a good day, I can almost forget it. On a bad day, I see my life in terms of a few years rather than living to old age. Even when I DO think my life may be shorter than most, on a good day I can be philosophical about it. Let my daughter get to 35 with a mum, let me get to Africa/India to teach for a bit, let me get back to work for a while.
I don’t mind the nicknames mostly if they come from someone I know loves me unconditionally. It worries me a little from my bf because we don’t live together, I’ve only been in the area for a year and I worry he may feel trapped with no way out. Pointless worries!
Thinking of you Kim. I know how I feel day before chemo. You wouldn’t wish it on your worst enemy.
