PS - Sorry GIJane! - You have a nice holdiay in Northumberland too! Lovely part of the world! 
Ooooops - sorry Katytc, it slipped from my fingers whilst testing how sharp it was!!
Happy hols to GIJane and Revcat.
Now are there any buns left?
Still have some super duper choc marble cake with malteers thingies on top, you can have a big slice if you stop throwing the meat cleaver around, can bungee, trampoline or use the transmat over to you.
Am on the āthink I have some sort of bugā bench, feeling a bit icky, early night for me xx
Woman in our village not need a meat cleaver last night. She used a Landrover!! After a drunken argument with her partner in the Spar, when he walked out she followed him and ran him over!! Air ambulance had to come apparently, Now heās in intensive care. Wasnāt me!! 
I missed all the excitement. I was on the phone, at home, to my daughter! Canāt blame THAT one on Tamoxifen?!
Right meat cleaver has been cleaned and put down - the malteser cake sounds lovely, think I will trampoline and bungee to the lots of nice things to eat bench, still struggling on the safe landings - oops nearly took someones head off - good job they ducked!
Katytc - hope you are feeling better this morning.
JCJ - the lady in your village evidently went over the edge beyond reasonable thought and acted on it - shame you missed the excitement.
xx
Pargayan - please could I borrow the meat cleaver for my work computer? I am trying to work from home but it keeps losing the internet connection and taking 30 minutes to find it again, by which time my chemo brain means I have forgotten what I was trying to do!
I may just give up and join the FF bench. I just texted my hubby to bring me my sick note from the surgery and a large bottle of cider as its so important to stay hydrated during chemo and the alcohol will also kill any infections while my immune system is affected.
Many thanks
Squeakymouse
Is there a āgalloping indigestionā bench? Tamoxifen (? or Rads? or both?) is playing havoc with my digestion and Iām about to eat again before I starve to death!
At this rate I wonāt be gaining weight on Tamoxifen - the discomfortās not worth the cake - (or vice versa?! - so tired can barely type!)
So tired I posted that on āstarting rads in Mayā thread by mistake. 
OK In RevCatās absence, Iām going to have to do some alternative Rev-ingā¦ The Meat Cleaver has been thrown in the lake. Too dangerous with all us emotional bodies around. The lace hankies have been topped up; fresh supply of spoons available, and microfibre cloths to dry the benches after all this rain.
JCJ, are you getting any help with the digestion? Virtual cake on itās way, which has virtually no effect at all!
Iām skipping through Benchland tra-la-la-ing because itās only a couple of days till I go on holidayā¦ Youāll have to forgive me if I wake you up or annoy you in any way, being cheerfulā¦
I could always start a Benchland Congaā¦
love Jane
WHEW!!! Thank goodness for Janeās prowess in ditching the meat cleaver and thank you for the replenishments, a sterling job in RevCatās absence.
Still a bit sicky so no Conga dancing for me but I can cheer loudly as you all conga round Benchland.
Squeaky I do like your train of thought regarding the ciderā¦
Pargayan hope you are enjoying the malteeser cake and anger is subsiding.
JCJ, had bad problems with tamoxifen until I was advised to take after a full meal, if you donāt already do that give it a try fingers crossed it will work for you.
Has poured with rain all day here fed up getting wet! xx
Firmly on the CBA bench today! Didnāt get up until after 10. Itās 1pm and I still havenāt had a shower or got dressed. Combination of Rads fatigue and total apathy!
I was all set to announce that my stomach problems were significantly improved - then I made the stupid error of having some breakfast! Better put up the windbreaks around Benchland! May need some particularly perfumed flowers too? 
Normally I hate watching TV in the day time, but just lately I am sooo glad OH got me a PVR for Christmas (because he was hogging the downstairs one!) Iāve got hours and hours of recorded programmes to catch up on!
Right! Come on! Shower! And I may even manage to put some clothes on too!
Glad to have found benchland again. I love the stories on this thread. However I was slightly worried when I saw the meatcleaver flying around; thanks Jane; we can feel safe.
@Revcat, when in Hungary, can you check on my daughter. She is in Budapest on a school trip; I canāt have her having too much fun there without me 
.
I really like Budapest.
For the ornithologists in Benchland: Not so much Blue Tit now as Robin Redbreast! Feel I should perch on the back of the benches and shout territorial messages!
If I had the energy!
Back on the āguiltyā bench for me, was a bit snappy with my Mum yesterday so am half on āguiltyā and half on ābadly behavedā benches. Oh dearā¦
Went to other hospital yesterday 60 mile trip and it was pouring with rain and I was freezing so poor Mum got the bad me. Am nicer today even though itās still raining.
Perked up a bit, not as sicky either, every other person I speak to seems to have had this bug, hopefully itās on itās way out.
Shooooooooooooooo JCJ stop it, you are perching on my shoulder instead of the bench!! xx
ummmhhh the malteser cake was scrummy!
think I need to go on the guilty bench as I was not a nce person to OH yesterday. I find I get really grumpy - not sure if it is the steroids or the antibiotics, but it is not how I normally am, Glad the meat cleaver has gone in the lake.
JCJ - I ised to take Tamoxifen last thing at night before I went to sleep and found by doing this I had fewer SEs with it. Until I settled on one brand I used to get terrible leg cramps which used to wake me up.
xx
Hi All
I have only recently been dx (Feb) and have just found this amusing/serious thread. I am hovering between
the I want my mummy! bench (Iām 58 for goodness sake and Mumās no longer here) the I can get through this
bench, the guilty bench (of course) and the I did this to myself bench because I was on HRT for 12 years after early
menopause.
Best wishes to all you lovely ladies and thanks for your cheerfulness and silliness. Itās only a sense of humour that keeps us going at times!
P.S. I know it was a while ago (but Iāve only just read it) But How To Give Your Cat a Pill is one of the funniest things Iāve ever read
P.P.S. can someone explain "spoons " to me?
Hi foxyferret,
Welcome to Benchland, there are always spoons available, usually in the shed, just bungee jump or trampoline over but be superly careful of the alligators who roam freely. RevCat is on holiday at the moment, she usually keeps the alligators under control. Any guilt gets thrown into the lake which is enormous now and lifebelts are available in case you throw the guilt in too forcefully and you accidently fall in!!! There is no fishing or swimming allowed but we have a spa, lots of cakes etc, so feel free to come and join in anytime xx
Spoons come in all different sizes and give you lots and lots of energy!!!
Ready for a laugh?
Itās a good job it doesnāt bother me, because Iām in the very fortunate position of having had my children 27 & 25 years ago,and DEFINITELY not wanting any more.
Less than an hour after having my first Zoladex injection to induce menopause, I get a call from the REACT trial nurse inviting me to collect my 1st yearās supply of meds from MATERNITY at my local hospital tomorrow!! Oh the irony!! Not been in that building since having my youngest 25 years ago! Weird.
Ah! So thatās what the spoons are for, I was wondering myself, Foxyferret, so thanks for asking. I kept meaning to read back through the posts on this thread to find out - (I never got around to some of the middle ones!) Definitely in need of a very large spoon today: It was a shock to the system having a 9.40 docs appointment this morning.
Still windy from Tamoxifen. Also time of month (3 weeks late - was soooo hoping wasnāt coming at all, and Iād not need Z after all - prob just scared off by Rads? :0) So extrememly tired.
Itās just taken me nearly an hour to write an email to my boss to explain my current situation and tell her doc given me sick note for another 3 weeks. He suggested a month, but I want to go back after half-term on a phased return if I can. Thank Goodness for the backspace eky (sec) thaāts all I say!!
Hi all. Been lurking and not posting much. Seem to be quite tired most of the time. I shall gather up some spoons. Iām currently in Cromer and the sea frit is happily rolling in. Back to sunny Coventry tomorrow ,then bloods Wednesday , zometa and onc Thursday. Oh the social whirl. On the plus side I seem to be permanently attached to the craft bench. Been knitting hats to give as Christmas gifts. Yes I know itās early but it takes a while to get stuff done.
X Sarah
Hi All
Now I know what the spoons are I shall help myself when required. Have managed to dodge alligators successfully today while moving about benches. Am mainly on the apprehensive bench as I have an appt. tomorrow with onc. to discuss rads etc. Still canāt really believe this is happening to me but heyhoā¦
Might pop over to the craft bench later with my cross stitch.
Best wishes
Sarah, go to the very comfy, squishy sofa and do your crafting from there, sending you lots of spoons and perhaps even a ladle. Good luck for Wed/Thurs xx
Foxyferret good luck to you too for tomorrow, Iām afraid I canāt join you cross stitching because I am the worst sewer ever, can manage a button and thatās about it! I can knit if thatās any help.
On the āreinforced fat b*******ā bench today between the tamoxifen and the amitrip am putting on weight, not a happy bunny! Will have to visit the āsalad barā bench, in fact maybe there for a long, long time, boo hoo xx