stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND) (Part 2)

Hope you’re feeling a bit better now, Katy and your sneezing and coughing haven’t developed into a full blown lurg. :crossed_fingers:t3:

Perhaps it’s for the best your op won’t be during the festive season. I did think it unlikely, in the current state of the NHS, for it to be that quick. I hope you don’t have to wait too long. One of my neighbours has been waiting 18 months for an URGENT gall stone op; he’s been hospitalised with it 3 times already! :flushed:

We didn’t get to the consultant appointment. :sob: He was stuck on the toilet and then the commode, in his pyjamas, unable to “go”, all morning, until after we should have left the house. Then he was an exhausted, anxious wreck physically unable to get dressed never mind get out of the house! YD was an absolute star and rang the hospital to explain the situation and arranged for the appointment to be done by phone. Not ideal but we so desperately needed to speak to Dr. The PD meds he takes through the day have been increased, which, along with increased antidepressant, has already made a massive difference. However, the first day of the increased dose was extremely traumatic because he’d developed a fear of taking that tablet, believing the increased PD symptoms and associated anxiety were caused by the tablets despite being told, repeatedly, by consultant, PD nurse and me that it was previous tab continuing to wear off before next one took effect. Eventually, I lost my temper with him, told him I’d reached the end of my tether and he took the first increased dose. What a surprise: It worked! As YD said, “it’s almost as if the professionals know what they’re talking about!”

The original suggestion was to move the tabs closer together and take 6 a day instead of previous 5 but because of his fear of it, he’s taking 1 1/2 tabs four times a day instead, which is easier to manage. I’m sooooo relieved we don’t have to go through transition to a new drug. I just couldn’t cope with that again! :scream:

He is continuing to improve but is in complete denial about how bad it was. The letters have come from both PDN and neurologist summarising our conversations and he laughed saying they were exaggerated. Nope! They state the facts exactly as they were. :rage::japanese_ogre::sob:

I’m still traumatised. A couple of times, I have even dreamt he was calling me and jumped awake to go to him only to find him fast asleep! It will take a while to recover but at least things look more hopeful, for now at least, and I might even be able to get out to my groups. I was so frightened that we had descended, permanently, into the next phase of PD. Not yet. Thank goodness.

At least YD got an indication of how bad it’s been. She believed me but it would have been annoying of she’d come all this way and he was fine. I enjoyed her company and moral support.

Unfortunately, DIL is working Christmas Eve so they won’t travel here on that day, like they usually do. Instead, they’re coming 27th (ES’s birthday. He would have been 40 :sob::sob::sob:) to 29th. We will have Christmas day on 28th. Not quite sure how I’m going to organise cooking the turkey as it will still need collecting on 23rd or 24th but I’ll cross that bridge… :thinking:

Hope you’re feeling well Katy.
I feel for you and your OH jcj, what you’re both going through is really hard. I hope the pills continue to help him improve. I’m glad your daughter was able to support you for some days. Fingers crossed you’ll be able to find some “me” time soon.
Well I’m home on a Monday recovering from the Covid jab. I had it on Friday and spent the weekend in bed feeling like it was Covid all over again. Chills, temperature, aches, nausea the lot. Luckily it’s subsided today, I just feel wiped out. Thank goodness my next day at school isn’t until Wednesday!

Oh my goodness JCJ, hopefully OH is now on a better path with increased meds…
Fab your YD was there for much needed support so difficult to deal with especially if someone is in denial arrrgh. Really hoping things are calmer, big hugs flying your way.
Oh no Ali, how awful, hope you are feeling better now. Has that happened each time?? Arrrgh.
Had my lido on Mon, felt so sick, nooooooooooooo, just for a day thank goodness.
Still have a little bit of a cough and sneezing occasionally so all ok.
Was out for lunch, yummy on Wed and have planned where we are off to for festive get together, just have to set a date and book. Pet hate is trying to work out where to go each year…
3 GC stayed Fri night all went well but 5 year old has lots of opinions (mostly wrong) hahaha. She is going to Spain next year on holiday and asked her if she had learned any Spanish, she says why?? They don’t speak Spanish, I said yes they do, she says no they don’t, so what language do they speak then?? says me, with a glowering look she replies they don’t speak Spanish. I gave up hahaha.
Have “done” a little ironing and hoovered today, now lying down to recover haha.
Jabs on Thurs and perhaps off to YD’s, she has a night out but is not too enthused about it so she says she will let me know tomorrow.
Eyebrow thing has decided to grow arrgh, still looks smallish but much more noticeable. GC were asking what it was at different times haha. Don’t want to have haircut badly needed, because fringe is hiding it xx

Hope your eyebrow doesn’t get too out of control and can be dealt with easily (suddenly reminded me of someone, on here, all those years ago commenting that their eyebrows were sliding down their face - made me chuckle again! :joy:) Is your appointment soon?

Hope you are fully recovered from your jabs now, Ali, and that yours don’t cause any problems, today, Katy. I’ve booked ours for tomorrow. Definitely don’t want OH to have any SEs: still traumatised from the last few weeks and, although much improved, he’s still got pains that are making him anxious. Dr says he has enlarged prostate and has prescribed (yet more) meds, which I shall pick up this afternoon. Blood tests in 2 weeks. Keeping everything crossed the tabs improve things and they don’t find anything more serious. :crossed_fingers:t3::crossed_fingers:t3::crossed_fingers:t3::crossed_fingers:t3::crossed_fingers:t3:

How many nativity rehearsals have you had so far, Ali? Although I am sooooo glad not to be dragging myself out of the house at some ungodly hour to scrape the ice off the car, I do miss the joy - and madness - of Christmas in a Primary school!

Re-booked my cancelled (when we were in hell and I couldn’t get out) garden centre lunch with a friend for next Tuesday, provided he’s OK to leave. Christmas lunch with the K&N gang the following Wednesday - ditto. Still got a cancelled coffee date, with another friend, to reschedule but waiting to see how things go.

Still debating with myself whether to have 2 Christmases, this year, or just wait for the girls and postpone until 28th. Hmmn :thinking:

Beautiful sunshine these last few days and gorgeous autumn colours but it’s been COLD :cold_face: so I’ve mostly stayed in the warm and enjoyed looking at it. Did actually make it, in person, to do the supermarket shop, yesterday, after the last 2 being done online and delivered, so that feels like an achievement. Also dropped off the summer duvets to be washed. Must remember to collect them on Saturday! :grin:

Oh deary me!! Picked up OH’s prescription this afternoon and half of it is missing!! The pharmacy has been struggling to get hold of both the main PD drugs - the one we spent a traumatic few months reducing and then increasing and the one that has just recently been increased. Noooooo! :scream: I hope they manage to source some soon or we will be in a mess. Again. We have about a week’s worth so hopefully they will find some before it’s desperate :crossed_fingers:t3::crossed_fingers:t3::crossed_fingers:t3::crossed_fingers:t3::crossed_fingers:t3::crossed_fingers:t3::crossed_fingers:t3:

OH read an article in his newspaper about a shortage of PD drugs and I said it was the usual journalistic sensationalism. Ah.

YD has been unable to get her proper meds since April, we did manage to get 10 here, 12 there now there is none at all anywhere. A kinda equivalent is now being issued but not correct strength, mmmmm. So frustrating, hope OHs meds are ok and there is just a blip in supply. Had to phone every chemist here each time, horrific.
Appointment is next fri, cant wait am hoping it can be chopped off, we’ll see.
Really hope you manage your days out with friends, lovely just to relax for a little while.
Think i would only have 1 xmas dinner and have a special treat on xmas day for the both of you.
Keeping fingers and toes crossed OH has no other issues.
Am at YDs train journey was good hurrah, it is so so cold here brrrrr xxx

I’m on the What The ****?! Bench. There was me worried that OH might have SEs from Covid and Flu jabs. He’s been fine but I’ve felt like :poop: since Friday evening. The irony. I barely go anywhere to risk coming into contact with the viruses and the jabs have made me feel like I have both Covid and flu simultaneously!! Coughing so much my chest muscles hurt. Determined to get out to my garden centre lunch today but I’m going to have to keep it short - for my sake, not his!! :roll_eyes: I’ve been frantically googling to check I won’t be putting anybody else at risk - especially my friend, who’s had Covid three times, each time worse than the one before!

OH still doing OK, although, of course, despite feeling rubbish, it’s still me doing all the meal prep etc etc :rage:

Picked up all of one missing medicine, yesterday, and just under half of the other. Will have to go back - Again - In a few days as the chemist says they’re only coming in a few at a time. The 60 I just collected were in an unbranded box (they come in 100s) so I’m guessing they are sharing out whatever they have between their PD patients. Fair enough - even if it does mean several trips for me!!

Oh my goodness, hope you are feeling better and did manage to go out.
Have heard a few people now having side effects, most have been only for 24 hours fingers crossed you are the same.
Glad you managed to pick up some of the meds, it is so worrying when needed.
Been into town today, just for a short visit, so couldn’t be bothered but have done it haha.
Snow all disappeared the next day thank goodness, just still very, very cold. Both train journeys were great no issues whatsoever. Said to YD don’t think I will be back until New Year. Arrived home and there was a letter from hospital a pre op assessment, so don’t know what I’ll be doing arrgh. If op is soonish will go through before Xmas.
Feet up now, woo hoo xx

Busy week this week. Catching up with things cancelled before. Went for a swim on Monday but struggled because I couldn’t breathe properly. Was supposed to be having coffee with a friend yesterday but she had to rearrange it for today so I grabbed the chance to visit S******** and get the Christmas bits and pieces that I can’t get in T…o, which I prefer going to because it is a less stressful drive. Some of those things WERE a very specific gin and some beers on DIL’s wishlist. This morning, I took OH for his blood tests and then to the barbers - at last! He’s been in desperate need of tidying up for weeks but I didn’t want to attempt it after the bodge job I did on him in Lockdown!! Then this afto, I met aforementioned friend. Introduced her to my new favourite café, instead of the pub we usually meet in for coffee. It’s been agreed that this place is better and we’ll continue to go there.
Tomorrow afternoon the new bed arrives so I shall need to strip the old bed, move it to hoover as much as I can and reorganise some furniture. The bed shop will assemble the new, small double and dispose of the king size for us. Hurrah.
On Friday I have K&N so it’s just as well OH is better enough to be left home alone for a couple of hours!!
Next week is looking busy too including swimming, sewing, (thank goodness his PD Nurse phone call appointment has been postponed until January so I won’t have to miss half of the last sewing of the year!) K&N Christmas lunch, and my long awaited carers assessment, by phone, on Thursday afternoon. The woman who rang to book it said it would be all about what I need, not what he needs, so I’m going to say I need someone to come in for a few hours on Tuesday mornings and Friday afternoons so I know i can always get out to Knitting, ambling and sewing even if he’s having an off day. The weeks when they’re not on, will be when I arrange coffee/lunch dates, swimming etc. I’ll also ask about respite care so I can go to Norfolk for a couple of nights at least once a year plus other little holidays. I never again want to feel as trapped as I have done these past few weeks!! It’s not good for either of us.

It’s been decided to delay Christmas until the girls are here. I’ll cook something nice for dinner: probably chicken chasseur but otherwise we’ll treat it like a normal day. (ie mostly spent on CBA bench? :stuck_out_tongue:)

I hope your plans aren’t spoiled by your op, Katy. But if they are, at least it will be done and you can look forward to a fixed, less ouchy foot :crossed_fingers:t3::people_hugging:

oh my goodness, where has the time gone???
Hope all is good with everyone.
Did have my op on Xmas Eve, went very well, am just finding my feet again, literally, hahaha.
Missing my little GS and YD, not going through until end of March now, should be well and truly back to normal by then. ED and 3 GC are here so I can see them anytime haha. All 3 birthdays done whew! Who has all children born in the same month??
Have been binge watching different series to stop boredom levels.
Managed to have lunch out yesterday hurrah, just been going to nearby coffee shop when meeting up with friends so it was lovely.
It’s been terribly cold damp and rainy here. Cousin has been travelling and pics she has sent are fabulous, not a cloud in the sky…we can but dream xx

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Oooh! There’s someone in Benchland!! It’s been eerily quiet in here for ages.

I’m glad you’re on the mend now, Katie and the improved foot will eventually make the whole disrupted Christmas seem worth it. :crossed_fingers:t3:

I hope everyone else is OK.

Things have improved here. OH is much more settled after recovering from the UTI and the increase in both his anxiety and PD meds. He’s still got pains, apparently, and has just had another course of antibiotics because a urine sample, requested by Dr, indicated another UTI. Luckily we got this one before it caused too many problems! He’s still not wanting to go anywhere very much and driving me nuts with his “jokes” and false memories but at least I can escape to my groups… at the moment. :crossed_fingers:t3::crossed_fingers:t3:

I’m actually leading the amble next week. I suggested we go to a beautiful Country Park that OH and I visit frequently… one of the few places he’ll go to… but most of the other amblers have never been there so I’ve ended up in charge! :thinking::flushed: I’m taking a couple of the ladies, on Saturday, to do a “practice run” to show them the walk in case I can’t go on Tuesday (he’s much better but I can still never guarantee I won’t have to cancel my plans at the last minute :rage:). One of these ladies is a very fit 86 year old so she’ll confirm if the amble is suitable.

In other news: Following my Carer’s Assessment, I did as I was told and applied for Attendance Allowance for OH: he has been awarded the higher rate, back dated to November!! Hurrah. Whoop whoop etc. Feel slightly guilty about it now he’s so much improved but I know we’re entitled to it and it will help next time things get tough.

Also, Operation Ely happened: I went, last week, by train, to Ely and met my girls for the day. It was sunny but COLD. So lovely to see them and OH managed at home by himself for the day. Yay! I’ve also risked booking a week’s holiday for the beginning of April. It’s less than 10 miles away but looks a lovely place and we’ve never visited that particular village. Something different to look at and somewhere new for me to explore but with no stressful journey. If that goes well :crossed_fingers:t3: OH says he’d like to go back to the marina where we were last summer but I’ll only book one week this time. Things are definitely looking up. For now. :grin:

That’s fabulous JCJ, lots of plans and able to get out and about again, makes a massive difference.
Good luck with your walk, how good are you!!
Brilliant OH is better in himself woo hoo.
Am just about to go into town a short trip, gets me out and it’s not raining haha.
Had an adventure last week not a good one though, heard a funny noise searched around to see what it was…water dripping from bathroom ceiling and kitchen, arrgh. Cracks in both ceilings and stains hopefully fixed soon, very unsightly.
Read a couple of books recently woo hoo for me hahaha.
Taking stuff down to charity shop, have been having a small clear out 3rd bag, it’s great because all things too good to just throw out. One taking down today has a childrens pop up tent, oh my goodness trying to get it down was impossible arrgh,…so have taped it, temper, temper, temper grrrr xx

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I hope your cracks and stains are being sorted, Katy. (That sounds more personal/medical than intended! :face_with_hand_over_mouth::rofl:) Yes, in my experience, “pop up” things are usually incredibly difficult to pop down again. I think this is why people abandon them at festivals.

I’m currently awaiting a phone call from duty Dr for OH. He’s got an “emergency appointment” because the pains, when peeing, are getting worse. Don’t know how much is psychological but we need to investigate. I expect it will be another urine sample to check if the last infection has cleared. Dr did mention possible referral to urologist (which OH got confused with neurologist: his PD consultant! :roll_eyes:) That’ll be fun?!! :worried:

… Later. Phone call as I was typing the above. Stupid Dr rang his mobile - which he couldn’t find in time to answer! :roll_eyes: Luckily immediately rang landline like they were asked to. Dr just said he’d send another prescription for the same antibiotic to pharmacy. It was me that suggested another urine sample should be tested to establish whether he even has an infection any more! Just dropped sample off so another waiting game.

Keeping everything crossed this doesn’t stop me ambling tomorrow. I did the practice walk on Saturday morning, with 2 friends, who also knit (not simultaneously with ambling :joy:) so they can lead if I can’t get there. They agreed it was a perfect location for the group. Forecast is great for tomorrow too so I’ll be gutted if I can’t go.

The garden is bursting into life with snowdrops, crocuses and mini daffs and I think the hedgehog(s) is/are awake. I’ve put the trail camera out again to check (last week, it was just cats and blackbirds stealing food from the hedgehog feeding station but I’ve adapted it to stop the cats!) :crossed_fingers:t3:

Any news from doc about OH??? How is he doing now?

Hope your walk went well and you were actually there?
Had my lido, nurse put in wrong timings so ended up being there for 6 hours, was a long, long day…
Felt ok but am still tired today.
Super boring day, had engineer out to set up a new box for tv, he was unable to so asked another engineer to come out and look at system. He came a couple of hours later and managed to sort everything, woo hoo. Really was glad he came today because this has all been going on for months, finally it’s done!!
No nothing about ceilings think it may be next week, no date arranged as yet.
Out for lunch tomorrow, looking forward to meeting up xx

I picked up the antibiotics yesterday and he started taking them at dinner. Same one he had the first time but these are 2x strength and slow release so he only has to take 2 a day, with meals. Phew! That’s easier to manage! He seems OK in himself but we’ve had a few odd moments: nightmare he struggled to wake up from and unable to move after his nap this afto. Don’t know if this is UTI - which I suspect may be back/never properly cleared - or antibiotics related. Don’t know when/if we’ll hear from Dr. Even if sample tests +ve for infection, duty Dr has already prescribed antibs! If he’s still got pains when he’s finished this course, we’ll try to speak to his usual Dr. She said something about a referral to urologist. OH’s been well enough for me to go out which is the main thing :stuck_out_tongue:

The amble on Tuesday was a resounding success. There were about 25 of us, more than usual, the weather was perfect and everyone seemed to enjoy it. Many people thanked me personally. Most of them had never been there before and several said they’d go again with spouses/family so win, win. I’m less anxious, now, about the October walk I have to lead.

Good news about your TV, at last, Katy. Hope your ceilings get sorted soon too. Enjoy your lunch tomorrow.

I’m knitting tomorrow - if OH still OK :crossed_fingers:t3:I’m going to show everyone the mad festive wreath I’ve just finished knitting :grin: Got to decide my next project because I’ve nearly finished both the tote bag, I’m redoing, and my carafe cosy and can’t be without some knitting to do! :scream:

Spent this afternoon in the garden doing a bit of spring pruning and tidying. Pulled out the dead sweet pea stems - which I’d deliberately left for the wildlife - and they were full of ladybirds, who all quickly ran for cover in the bush. Wildlife gardening success = My laziness paid off! :stuck_out_tongue::lady_beetle::heart_eyes: Lovely to feel that winter is on its way out… although I’m sure we’ll still have some more before spring is properly here.

Going to suffer with my hands after all that secateuring. :cry: I’ve been researching (NHS sites only) to see if there is anything I can take to keep Arthur at bay but apparently all the usual suspect supplements are not recommended because there is no evidence they actually work. Hmmm. :thinking: