Breast cancer can be cured at all stages but 4. But even stage 4 can be treated so well that some women are now living with it as a chronic disease instead of a death sentence. Stage 3 isn’t optimal but them breast cancer isn’t either. It’s just a stage and will determine what kind of treatment you will go through but treatment is a great equalizer. There are many stage 3 people who are cured never to see breast cancer again. There is no reason to think you won’t be one of them
As far as questions to ask, a few things you’ll want to know is what kind of breast cancer you have (there are four main types) and then where it originated from (lobular versus IDC). Another thing is grade perhaps along with how many nodes they think are involved. None of this is definitive at the moment since your pathology result after surgery will be the final word but knowing what they suspect is helpful just to know what kind of treatment you may need. And as far as your kids, it’s tough but I think all of us mothers on this site have been thrilled with their resilience. If explained well in ways that are age appropriate kids just adjust. Mine were 14 and 16 when I was diagnosed and we tackled it as a family. I stayed cheerful around them, hopeful, and gave them ways in which to help me so that they felt some semblance of control. And they just did great. It truly has simply been a blip in their lives that they no longer think about. Now do I think about it? Of course. It will never be a blip for me. But I do feel good most days, live a very active lifestyle and quite frankly don’t look like I’ve ever had a double mastectomy much less chemo. I’m just a little over two years at this point and living my life. One day you’ll be there, too. Just hang on.
Thank you so very much for your reassurance. The scans are playing awfully on my mind. I’m trying to take it a bit at a time. I’m guilty of being a worrier at the best of times so this has just been completely overload. Feeling completely lost and just want to hide xo
Sam, don’t be shy about asking for help during this time period. The day I was diagnosed I asked my doctor for a prescription of xanax. I just wanted one bottle so if it got too much I’d have a recourse. She had absolutely no issues with prescribing it. I think I may have taken three pills out of the bottle but I still keep it for a “just in case” scenario. Nobody take a cancer diagnosis comfortably and doctors understand that.
I sam i just wanted to reach out to you.
My mums friend was stage 3 she had a 9cm breast lump with lots of nodes.
That was during covid. And she is fab now and cancer free.
Stay positive. I know its easily said than done.
Im 33 and got diagnosed in june and i know how scared you feel. Please know you are not alone and there is light at end of that tunnel… even if it is stage 3!
I had my second round of chemo last week and its very doable, im also a mum to a 2 year old. Sending love x
What a lovely read! Your message is so uplifting.
Im 33 and got diagnosed in June, got a 2 year old girl to think about.
Had my second chemo last week, having 6 rounds in total as mine is HER2 POS
There is light at end of that tunnel and im looking forward to getting where you are!
It is going quite quickly to be honest… glad! X
Yes, I feel like my whole world has been tipped on its head. I know the kids are worried. I’m trying to be quiet ‘matter of fact’ and upbeat around them but inside I’m absolutely crumbling. Thank you so much for your advice.
Back for another biopsy tomorrow so I won’t get much more info at this point. I wish I could start treatment today, the waiting is a worry xo
My GP phoned today to check on me and I couldn’t hold it together. He prescribed me diazepam and also a different sleeping tablet. I haven’t taken any diazepam yet but good to have them there. I could’ve done with it yesterday as it was an awful day- I cried most of it. Thank you!
That’s great news about your GP. I was hysterical and couldn’t speak when my GP called me - diazepam has been so helpful - I was taking one and then another if I needed it (up to four a day - they were lowest dose to allow me to use when needed). I only went to two on two really bad days.
I have also been taking mirtazapine sleeping tablet/anti depressant and the change in me has been so good. I’ve gone from literally crying all day, unable to cope at the smallest things, to being able to think straight, rational, have fun days out. The wait for results still there but I can cope with it.
You will get there xx
I am so glad you asked for them. Don’t hesitate to take them when needed. Once treatment starts you’ll feel better but until then we all know how tough it is. Do what you need to do to survive.
Yeah it seems like forever for treatment to start but once it does, it flies by. I was in chemo from August 7th to October 7th, 2022 and it was like a blink I was done. Every day I just focused on what I could do to feel good. I walked, did work, did housework, and just took my time remembering to be gentle with myself and it worked nicely. Chemo was difficult but not insurmountable and I healed completely from it as far as how I feel and my bloodwork. You’ll hit the two year mark before you know it and will look back and think WTF happened but at the same time, be mega impressed with what a boss you are
Honestly once you get your treatment plan you will feel loads better. People kept saying that to me and it really was true.
Thank you, im okay feeling my normal self again today from last weeks chemo.
I only had one round and i noticed a massive difference in my breast… the swelling had gone etc just a few days after first one.
After my second one its even softer now feels like my other boob! I can still feel the pesky lump but im having to feel around to find it now!x
Thank you everyone I’m so glad to have registered on here, it doesn’t feel just so lonely now. I’ve noticed my shoulder sore since the biopsy. I did have a bit of a sore shoulder before but the pain seems so much more noticeable since the biopsy. I have noticed other pains in other joints in last couple of weeks too which weren’t like that before. Also, I have felt so tummy bloated since the biopsy, it can be quite uncomfortable. Of course I have been going crazy with worry that these things are to do with the breast cancer. I’m trying to tell myself it’s anxiety but I don’t know if anxiety would cause such prolonged and extreme symptoms. Does this make sense to anyone? My biopsy was 2nd Aug and it’s been constant since then xo
Anxiety can cause just about anything. I won’t tell you not worry since it’s impossible. I will tell you to take medication for it when it becomes overwhelming and to try and distract as much as possible. This part will be over soon.
I’ve had a sore shoulder and under my arm since my biopsies , it hurts more than the breast ones tbh so I think that’s normal x
I get my treatment plan on Tuesday and actually feel a bit calmer knowing I’ll be on the right track soon . I know I’ll be having chemo as I’ve come back HEr+ , it’s my birthday on Saturday and I’m off to a festival and determined to enjoy it !
Lots of people have node involvement and are here to tell the tale , please don’t panic although it’s easier said than done I know because I’ve had some dark days since diagnosis .
I was told no node involvement but have been warned that could change after surgery as they don’t really know what’s there until they operate .
Every twinge I’ve had I’ve panicked wondering if it’s spread , but I’ve realised worrying won’t change the outcome whatever it is … so it’s a waste of energy and I’m going to need all my reserves for the coming months .
My 75 year old mum was diagnosed with non Hodgkin follicular lymphoma in 2022 after a tumour was discovered on her spine . She had chemo and is on immunotherapy and lives a happy and active life . Walks three miles every day and recently went to Costa Rica on holiday …
Hang in there and remember nothing is certain until they tell you it is … just because it’s in your nodes it doesn’t mean it’s anywhere else … x
I quite often wish I could turn back time to when none of this was happening … it’s utterly shit I won’t lie but this forum is testimony to the fact that we can get through this x
I hope your treatment plan settles some anxiety in you. I’m having a biopsy done in morning, just a bit that they neglected to biopsy first time around. I’ll probably try to speak to the consultant re the aches and swelling but I suspect he might tell me to wait for the scans. I know what you mean, I’d love to be able to turn the clock back. I’d be more on the ball with checking and I’d be much healthier too! What a whirlwind to find ourselves in- it’s surreal and consuming xo
We just have to focus on where we are now and get through it x
I had to go back for more biopsies on a third lot of calcifications last week - it feels like it’s dragging things out but at least they are being thorough x
I had a second lot of biopsies done this morning. I asked if I could have a word with my consultant as I wanted to ask him about the pains round my body and bloated tummy. When he walked in I just burst into tears. I know he can’t give me anymore answers until scans are done. It really is a case of hoping and praying for the best outcome now. Yes, it is good they are being thorough- the waiting and the unknown are hellish though xo
xo