Ohhhhhhhhh its nearly 5am…I think I’m in the wrong slot, I’m usually lurking around at 3.
I was going to pop over to BENCHLAND but I see most people have nodded off and hogging the best benches in preparation for tomorrow ( like towls on the good chairs round the pool!!!
Counting spoons is an option too, as apposed to sheep, maybe I can sneak an extra while everyone is still dozy…
Minds are working ovrtime, sleep is alluding me, so its a cuppa and a nose on here then I may have another go :o)
Clare xxx
Oh dear - I had hoped you’d had a good night, but then I’ve just seen this
Hope you can sleep and rest during the day to make up for last night.
Nicky xx
Hi potmaid
You weren’t alone, I was up until 5am but avoiding sleep rather than have it avoid me. Was having a bit if a spring clean. Fetched stuff out from under my bed. Cleared out my medicine box (lots of expired products I was alarmed to note). Cleared out some drawers etc. need a good dust & vacuum today but yesterday’s energy escapes me for some strange reason…lol! I had the film Bucket List earlier during my cleaning activities which left me in a strange mood. Hopefully you’ll collapsd into a deep sleep tonight (unless you’ve cat napped during today to survive).
I might have trouble with sleeping tonight as it’s my op tomorrow but I have some tablets as back up.
Hugs to you x
Twinky
Hi :o) I had hoped to sleep too Nicky but woke up chatting away to myself at about 3, goodness knows what about now but I was actually talking when I woke up, a very strange feeeling lol. Had a busy day, no cat naps for me but a fun day with my dear mum who does retail theraphy like a pro…totally knackered now, so will try and hold out for a good nights rest tonight.
Twinky you sound like a whirlwind in the middle of the night, I’m not surprised though if you have your operation on your mind. Sending you lots of TLC and hugs for tonight, hopefully you can rest a little, with or without the tablets.
I’m sure I have seen Bucket list, no wonder it made your mood strange, its almost what I am doing at the moment, ticking off little goals and things I would like to achieve.
Hugs back to you both x
Clare xxx
I’ll wish you good luck for tomorrow Twinky.
Not quite up all night, but I do find myself wide awake in the middle of the night but try not to get on here if I can stop myself!
I’m often around in the middle of the night but internet has been broken for a few days and even when it’s working I don always get a signal from my bed but frequently on the night night shift so I read or play cards on my iPad… But would rather be on here speaking to the rest of the night owls.
I’m on a steroid high tonight for Chemo no 5 in the morning… So might see you around
Lx
Hmmmmmm 3am…
But I did actually go to bed at 11 so haven’t done so badly. I am sleepy enough to perhaps have another go at sleep.
I have been reading a lot on here, some of you are living with such pain and other problems, some relating to BC or just ‘normal’ day to day living, its no wonder you are up and about fretting.
There is so much hope and humour on here too, working such magic for the us all, each one sharing such compassion and empathy to one another, its simply tremendous to see such vigor and ‘fight’.
I hate all the sayings…survivor etc cause really we are doing what we can because we have to, no choice really…Each connection between us though is special, as it keeps us all going in the right direction and it seems that however bad the knock is on a particular day, we just get up dust off and for those who need a little more tlc, carry them until they are strong enough to cope.
My heart goes out to you all. (i think my lack of sleep is steroid related too!!!
Clare xxx
Hello sleepless ones. I’m just snuggled up in bed having had a fab night in the studio with a talented piano playing friend of mine. Got a song arranged and recorded so that totally took my mind off my op! Got home about 2:45 and did the washing up to calm myself down a bit before making hot chocolate and heading to bed. Will have a long lie in and await the return of hubby as I’m not due at the hospital until 5pm. Not nervous at all for the moment. Got lots of musical stuff on the go so lots of reasons to grin and bear the surgery. Am chasing my dream of making a living from songwriting and trying to view this break with ‘normal’ work life (very stressful and unsatisfying) as an opportunity to think more about how I’m going to get where I want to be. Can’t let this cancer suck the lust for life from me (although all the treatments we have to go through to fight this try their best to do so).
Lots of hugs to you all. Night x
Twinky (Jo) xx
I’m still up Clare, I did sleep from 6.30pm - 8.00pm, but I’ve got digestive problems and am in pain, flippin’ chemo and the necessary drugs we take! You’ve only had 4hrs and that’s no good for anyone, hope you do manage to sleep soon.
I’ve half heartedley shaken my rug and cleaned the floor, looks a bit better! I was feeling untidy in the mind looking at the untidiness surrounding me. Do you know, sad but true, it’s the state of my house which gets to me the most. Now, I’ve never been a cleaning freak but have always liked a tidy home, I’m a sort of shove it in a cupboard kinda gal, but what the eye can see has to be ship shape. Done a few jobs in the kitchen too, my hubby is chief cook and bottle washer at the moment but…well… he does a great job cooking, however when it comes to keeping up to floors etc he’s blind as to what needs doing. I’m not complaining cause he’s been a marvel, and he doesn’t have time to do everything.
I too read lots of posts here, and yes some poor people are struggling, I feel so much for the ladies with young children as I don’t know how I’d have coped with BC when my two girls were little. There’s some very resilient ladies here, mostly they ‘just get on with it’ but oh boy it cannot be easy.
The support we all get from these forums is tremendous, I do wonder how I’d have coped without BCC, at times it feels like a life saver.
Spent part of the evening perusing cookery books in preparation for when my taste buds return, and looking ahead to when I can go back to normal appetite. I’ve also trawled the web and I now have a file of great recipes. I’m not the best cook in the world, married to a chef it’s never been necessary, but I hate convenience food and never eat it, sometimes I think my hubby’s food is over rich - chef’s food as opposed to cook’s. So, I’ve found some very easy to prepare, nutritious recipes, which I can experiment with when hubby’s not home for dinner. Just need my taste buds back.
Hope you are back in the land of nod now Clare, I shall try to get some kip soon.
Take care, one and all.
Libby x
Edit, just read your post twinky. Best of luck tomorrow. x
Should I say good evening as I haven’t been to bed yet or good morning as the dickie birds are already thinking of clearing their throats? Currently in the children’s ward at local hospital with one of my girlies and due for Herceptin tomorrow morning so not far to crawl… glad they have recliner chairs in the chemo ward, I’ll later be reclined and snoring! Did the 80 mile trip to the office yesterday and felt so tired I left early, got to OH’s place after nearly dozing off on the motorway on the 80 mile trip home and had a snooze for half an hour then off to school for youngest to see subject presentations for GCSE choices then home then unscheduled trip to A&E and have been awake since then. Hospital wards are so hot I’m melting and can’t just strip off to cool down as now in the ward with lots of parents and children snoring and talking in their sleep. Really glad I had that nap but I’m going to be a mess tomorrow morning(today?). I love my girlies but they keep me busier than Id like to be sometimes .
Really hope you all have some catch up snoozes today!
You deserve meals on wheels and all those other treats when you’re feeling so weary…
May the magic fairies come and support you loads!!!
I’ve only just got up because I can’t stop sleeping! A trial in another form!!!
CM do hope your daughter and you are ok today and your treatment led to a homecoming of solid sleep.
Wx
I hate to brag…but I slept all night :o)
First time in months. I went to bed so happy and content as the day had just been so good.
Hope ur daughters ok CM and ur Herceptin was ok, now I hope ur snuggled out on the sofa with a bit of TLC
I hope you managed to sneak in a few hours Libby too…
Clare xxx
Clare are you showing off?
Haven’t actually been home other than to get some bits for girlie. Eyes are hanging on my cheeks, I’m too flipping old to be able to pull an all-nighter …
But an early night beckons . Might have a small glass of wine first though. Reckon I should get a few good hours in the land of nod and will manage a passable imitation of human tomorrow, as long as nobody looks too closely!
Clare, you brag all you like pet, I was sooooooooo happy to hear you had a night of quality sleep. Your daughter sounds a special, (other thread) talented, well balanced, thoughtful, and just a right good lass (as we say in the north), like her mum, me thinks. How comforting for you to know it ain’t just mum who adores her and recognises her attributes…but teachers too, and I’m sure a host of others.
I’m posting here as going to try to get some kip soon, had a glass of vino to help me feel sleepy, but there’s every chance I’ll be awake in the early hours and back to this thread. Hope you’re not here Clare if I do return at silly o’clock, wishing you another all nighter.
Catch you later,
Libby xxx
Hi there,
I am here but have had at least 6 hrs sleep, went to bed at 10 ( no interet distratction lol) Just having a cuppa T and then I’ll have another go…
Feeling a bit sorry for myself, hands ach like an old ladies and my feeet are like walking on hot coals from the chemo, oh and a nice dose of oral trush added in :o)
I was so on a high with my daughter, I suppose I had to come down a little, was a bit weepy earlier, I shall miss so much…it hurts. I know though that at least in one important area that she will not struggle, she really came out of herself that night as I teased her and said she was my little star…she told me to 'bXXXer off and I nearly died of laughter, because we just don’t say that at home and it came out so funny, with her casting a weary eye to see if she had gone too far.
My son, too was so proud, He’s so like me, a bit of a plodder (we get there in the end) Personality, he is outgoing and open and true to himself. If only he can find a job that he likes, he will do well in it. He is working now and I have just said to take opportunities where he can for now as he has much on his plate to juggle with.
Its hard sometimes, they need there own space and I just want to hold them forever, they understand, I guess and are very willing and never hold back.
Enough now, i’ll have a browes then try and get another few hours in. I have a visitor today, a good friend but she wants to bring her 9 yrs old and her dog…i think I may tell her the dog is one too many as I’m not really in the mood, nor will m dog be.
night night, hope there aren’t too many on here tonight.
Clare xxxx
Don’t waste ‘spoons’ on dogs… or nine year-olds… they are too precious.
Loved the little tale of your daughter - how good is that as a sense of ‘normal despite’
Have a great day… and as ever thank you for the openness and vulernabilty you show us.
Hello wide awake club… Anybody else up and about… Was dozing on sofa and now gone to bed but OH is snoring and the wind is blowing so I’m BCCing.
Lxx
Morning/evening all.
Haven’t been to bed yet, probably won’t bother. Have had a horrible day, non-BC family traumas all weekend and I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. My mind’s racing at 90 miles an hour and I’ve been frantically playing Bejeweled Blitz on Facebook (addictive game!) for pretty much the whole day to stop my mind from running away with itself. I’ve been bursting into tears even with the mental chewing gum of the game, and would really like to be able to STOP my head.
I am finding all the current crap impossible to cope with, and don’t know where to turn to - even phoned the Samaritans earlier just to have a human voice to hear so I didn’t bother my friends who already have more than their own fair share of crap to deal with and don’t need me to pile on any more.
There, feel so much better just for writing that. Thanks, all.
OHHH CM,
I hope you managed to sleep a little as you had such an awful night the other night too.
Isn’t it odd that we don’t like to bother friends? There must be someone you could chat too, if not of your currant situation, just to catch up and have some company.
Wish I could come and give you a hug…
You rest andd take care
Clare xxx