waiting for surgery....

I am so glad I joined the Forum today - there are so many people with real feet on the ground positive attitudes, inspirational! I may yet reach 95! I had the biopsy a week ago and got the results on Sept 8th. I am 52 and have a 3cm Grade 2 IDC that I found by accident getting dressed one morning a few weeks ago. I am waiting for the date of surgery by WLE (I’m generously built so hope to get away with it) + Sentinel Node Biopsy, to be done at the end of September, it will be a 2 week wait for the results. My mood is swinging from being really ok about it, to -OMG terrified- several times a day. I am using the wait for my op to get my dental work done and to clear my desk at work. I am trying hard to improve my diet, and OH and I have been walking or swimming every night for the past week to try and get me a bit fitter for the operation. He retired at 60 last week, so I just need to get him trained up to do the housework!! I have been struggling with my feelings since my Mum died in April, I have a lot of fears at the moment, There is a woman in my head who is screaming all the time – and I think it’s me…
Any messages gratefully received.

Hi Peachez, Only going to reach 95? l was at least hoping for 100, but if you are happy with 95!!
I was called back from a routine mammogram in January, diagnosed in Feb. WLE in March, not enough clear margin so another op in April, still not enough margin so mx in May, l had quite a few lymph nodes involved.
I have one more chemo at the end of September, so seeing a light at the end of a tunnel!!
Then radiotheraphy for three weeks.

We have done the terrified and the woman in the head screaming!! the nights were worse for me, but now my head is getting round everything and trying to stay positive, still have down days, but that is how it goes, hence we call it the roller coaster!!

Sounds like you are trying to stay fit and healthy so good for you.
The operations were really no problem, so take it in your stride!!

If you have to have chemo, it is really do able! so have no fears of it. even the hair loss, is managable, the main thing we are aiming for is a good outcome!

Sorry you have had this worry after your Mum dying in April.
You will have lots of fears, but there really are some lovely ladies on here, so post a question whenever you feel the need or just someone to chat to.

Hope it is not too long before you get the date of your op!

Good Luck
Sandra xxx

Hi, Peachez, welcome to the forum. you sound a down to earth, glass half person like me. I endorse everything Sandra says as always ( a very wise woman, is our Sandra). I was diagnosed in March, had MX and node clearance in April, just over half way through chemo. today,day 3, is always my worst day after treatment, but, hey, I’ve manged to drag myself out from under the duvet to catch up with my cyber friends! You can do it!!

Carolxx

Hi Peachez, Welcome to the forum! Sorry you’ve had to join us, but you’ll find lots of help and encouragement here. I found a lump in July, diagnosed 3rd Aug and surgery on the 19th (same as your having). I think the worst time for you is now. I was a mess between being diagnosed and surgery, not sleeping, crying and yes, screaming in my head!! But I can honestly say that the surgery wasn’t so bad and have felt much better since having the results. It’s so much easier when you know what your facing! I’m waiting for results of my CT and bone scans now and to see the oncologist. Chemo should be starting in the next two weeks they say.
So don’t give yourself a hard time for struggling at the moment. It will get easier. Oh, and I’m big busted myself and the results of the op are amazing. I guess it’s one of the few occasions I’m grateful for being well blessed!!
Keep us posted on how you get on hun. xx

Hi Peachez

Ditto to all the others have said. I’m out the other side now (WLE last yr, chemo and rads this yr), so it can be done!

Julia xx

Hi Peachez

Sorry you had to join us here. I too agree with the others and ‘our Sandra’ is a wise and witty woman.

I was very much like you at first, very up and down with my head all over the place. The hardest part is the waiting for the results, but I found a positive attitude helps and not bottling things up. If you keep popping on here you’ll get lots of support and will get through it. I remember back in June when I was waiting for my SLNB results to come through and was frantic, I started posting on here whilst I was crying, and by the time I’d got to the end and had poured everything out I felt much better! then when the responses came I went from strength to strength, just knowing that somebody understands exactly where you are and what you’re going through and knowing you’re not alone. Such wonderful women; it really is a good place to share everything.

I’m a ‘chemo’ first girl (like to be different!) and expect to finish around Christmas; nice present hmm?

I was 50 yesterday and had a fab birthday, so yes you can still enjoy life whilst having bc.

I wish you well,

Denise x

ps typos…

Thank you all so much for your replies, it means so much to hear from you all. I seem to be seeing a pattern of being as ok as I can be until late afternoon. Then comes a voice ‘I have cancer… I have cancer…’ over and over again, it’s almost impossible to shut it up. Also every ache or pain means I have Mets - all in my mind I hope! Hopefully I will hear the date for my op tomorrow. All support is very gratefully accepted.Thank you again. P

Hi all, Got my date yesterday - 5th October. 20 days and counting… I feel so much better just now, I have started shouting back at that screaming woman - it helps! Yesterday was the first day that I haven’t cried. Any advice out there on what to wear in hospital? PJs or Nighties? I went looking for bras for afterwards on M&S website and all the 38/40E sizes were sold out, anywhere else I can look?

Hi Peachez

I can see that you have received valuable support from your fellow users, in addition please feel free to call our helpline for a listening ear and further support, the line is open 9-5 weekdays and 9-2 Sat on 0808 800 6000.

Here is a link to the BCC publication about having breast surgery which you may find helpful to read:

breastcancercare.org.uk/healthcare-professionals/publications/quick-order-list/*/changeTemplate/PublicationDisplay/publicationId/100/

Take care
Lucy

Hi, Peachez, PJ’s button up, you need to be “accessable”. I got my post surgery bras from Asda, they cost £6 back in May. Although I bought some expensive ones after that, I still wear my Asda ones every day, very comfortable. Good luck with everything, you are well on your way now.

Carolxx

I bought a few different PJs and nighties before I went for my op, but have found that most I haven’t been able to wear. Yes being accessible is very important. The best have been PJ separates from M&S, the tops are strappy/camisole soft cotton tops. I couldn’t stand anything that touched under my arm pits. The tops are £12, but definately worth it. I found bras more difficult as I’m a GG, but got one from M & S and one from bravissimo. I’m nearly four weeks post op now, and hopefully will be back in my under wires soon. The arm is feeling much better the last couple of days. Clothes were a bit tricky after surgery too, couldn’t wear a lot of my tops as I couldn’t lift my arm into them. So if you’ve got loose tops or blouses they’ll definately come in handy. Wish I’d known that before. Can finally get into things!! Good luck with it all. xx

button up pjs are good for hospital for ease of access to the surgery site, as doctors do like to get you to flash your chest at them afterwards. I got m and s bras too and they were good. You need easy access tops too, the little strappy vests were great for me too. Pretend your arm is sore now and that you can only move it slightly up, then see if you can get into your tops easily. If you can, they should be fine. If they cant, get some different ones!

Have slippers that are easy to slip on and off without having to bend down to do it. Take an eye mask to hospital as its too bright to sleep. Get bottled water with sports tops so you can open them easily with your teeth. With surgery restrsicting one arm and a cannula/needle stuck in your good side, it can be hard to pour drinks/open bottles etc at first, and is nice not to have to ask people.Be aware that a general anaesthetic can take it out of you and can take a good few days to get over, so be super kind to yourself, and dont worry if you get tearful.

I hope it goes well for you,

Vickie
xxx

Hi Peaches I know just how you feel. I went for routine mammogram and had a recall and biopsy and was told results on 30th Aug that i had DCIS but still dont know how bad it is. I went for MRI on 9th Sept and was expecting results today as this would say what the surgery would be.Its right behind my nipple. When I phoned for the results I was told I needed to have a further ultrasound as the MRI was not conclusive enough. I was so upset and am now scared that its worse than I was told. I am on an emotional rollercoaster as I lost my dad on 10th June (he lived with us) and I havent dealt with that yet. I feel I am in a whole new world and I dont like it one bit. Keep your chin up xxx Spotnot

Thank you all for the tips, I’ve booked Friday off work to start getting organised, looks like M&S, Bravissimo and Asda will be on my list! Denise - happy birthday for the 12th! (I’ve been so wrapped up in myself I should’ve said earlier).
I just want this thing out of me now, am feeling very impatient and frustrated, very afraid that the wait will give it time to spread although the nurse says not so. Only a little cry today, brought on by my daughter and her step-dad snapping at one another… both feeling the strain too I guess.
I have a gym ball, a yoga mat and DVD but haven’t done anything with them yet… do any of you recommend??

Just reading your post im having surgery next week looked on m/s site for post surgery bras the sizes i wanted was out of stock went into the store they only had samples you can order from them i collect mine on friday went y/day thanks for the tip on the pj

I also took a big, large sturdy gift bag to “hide” and carry around my drains, I had three for the whole week and it’s easier to carry them around once you are mobile again. Good Luck!

Do they not put bags on them how long are the drains

Hi Peachez
It sounds like you’re following along a very similar path to me, just a few months later. That awful feeling of alternating between being quite brave and then screaming inside is so familiar.
I’m 51 and in June I found a lump above my nipple which turned out to be a 3cm grade 2 IDC, had the surgery 20th July, WLE with cosmetic style breast uplift to hide the resulting hollow (try Googling therapeutic mammoplasty and/or oncoplasty) and SNB. Results from the biopsy before the operation were a bit different from the results of the pathology tests after surgery, the latter being mostly more in my favour, so don’t assume biopsy results are gospel - they’re only a guide.
SNB meant I only had to have two nodes removed and they both tested negative, so no further clearance required – fantastic news! Had one night in hospital then home with drain still attached. Had that emptied (very small quantities) for two days then removed.
Like you I’m a large build (D or DD cup) and was told before the op (predicted 2cm tumour) that it would be a 1 or 2 cup size reduction but after removing a 3cm tumour, I was left with an A or B cup on that side. It’s a good shape, only a bit of a dent towards the armpit, and will probably look better in 10 or 20 years time than the original breast would have done! But I wish I’d been mentally prepared for the lob-sided appearance. I’m now planning surgery to even me up.
The best bra solution for me was padded nursing bras (Canadian make Bravadol from John Lewis, but they’re £29) with a wide soft band underneath and removable foam pads.
I recovered full arm and shoulder movement within two weeks, although it was sore. Suggest you make use of the physio ball and the mat by doing some Pilates type exercises since they’re gentle but get you stretching. I was doing those daily before surgery and doing them 2 or 3 times a day now I’m into radiotherapy, to stop the breast tissue tightening up.
Sarah x

P.S. To Elaine-r, drain tubes are several feet long - I found the biggest hazard was catching mine on kitchen cupboard handles or car seat levers!

Hi Spotnot, so very sorry to hear about your Dad. I know Exactly where you’re coming from about the ‘New World’ feeling. I just want to turn the clock back sometimes, Mum was alive, I was well and life was just ticking along nicely… we shall be strong together. We will get through this. Let me know how you get on.
All the info on drains v useful and informative, thank you all.
CheshireCheese, thankyou, your situation sounds so like mine. I would not be surprised to find my lump is larger than the 3cm. Your node results are what I dream of, what a releif for you! I will get the pilates video on after work tonight. Overdid the backstroke in the pool last night, so much that I have painful shoulders this morning! I already have trouble with the hem of my dressing gown catching on the kitchen cupboard handles (they are the long vertical type) - I will be especially careful, or maybe leave all that to my OH and not go in there at all for a few days.
P x

Hi Peachez
Those kitchen cupboard handles are a real nuisance, bet they were designed by a man! I suggest that you could also find that the Hoover and ironing board are potential threats and therefore you shouldn’t go near those either…