Waiting on results again!

hi everyone--------big hugs to all of you!!!

i found two lumps in my left breast about 3 months ago and after waiting for a couple of months decided it was time to get them checked out. i got an urgent referral to the clinic and got a mammogram (ouch lol) last week, as i am age 35 this was a new experience but not as bad as i thought as its only uncomfortable for a few seconds of the actual squashing of your breasts lol!

last year i had a lump removed from the same breast which was all clear! but that lump is different to these lumps as these lumps are inside my breast, deeper, are not painful, do not move and are close to each other separated by what feels like a hole ??? my lump last year was on the surface of my breast and was red, itchy and infected but did not go away with antibiotics so i eventually had it removed after a few months.

i find myself on the same limbo path and WAITING AGAIN !!! its hell, anyone who has not experienced this does not really know and cannot know the agony that this waiting is. the uncertainty, the fear, anxiety, the pain of waiting.

i want to take a moment to say to everyone that i know how you feel and completely understand.

this site has been a great source of information and support for me personally. and to have a section on a site which caters to people who are waiting like us is great. whats more the nurses are great too on the phone. i plucked up the courage to call and got a lot of support from a lovely nurse who gave me answers to the questions i have about my return to the clinic for my results this THURSDAY. so take my advice and call as they are great and are there to help.

thanks for reading this, i feel a bit better after posting this message, now i just need to try and find a way to occupy myself until Thursday. wishing everyone luck with their tests xxxxxxxxxx, wish me some too! xx

Hi Melanie,

I just wanted to wish you all the very best for your results appt on thurs. I will be keeping everything crossed for you. Hopefully the news for you will be good, but if its not so good then please remember that we are here for you and will know exactly what you are going through. I was diagnosed last march when I was 34 so I can relate totally.

Anyway, fingers and toes crossed you’ll be fine. Take care and be sure to let us know how you get on,

Kelly
-x-

thanks Kelly xx

loads of people say that its less common to get BC when you are young but as you well know there are those that do. i would love to say something really profound to you to make you feel better but i know i cant except to say thank you and that i hope sincerely that you are on the mend xxx

i just hope also that i am ok for my sake as well as my husband, two sons and my family and friends.

i’m not going to post all my fears here because i know that all i can do is wait it out first. and i know that all of you here know what those fears are as you are all going through it too. also i have to try and stay positive about Thursday.

hugs to all of you again xxxx

So sorry to hear that you are in the waiting period - it really is the pits ain’t it!

Good luck for Thursday - everything crossed for you that you get the all clear, but if not we are here for you and you will get loads of support from the lovely ppl on this site.

Hello Melanie,

My thoughts are with you as you wait for your results. I’ve been there once and now am there again, as they investigate a suspicious area in my other breast( whilst doing my chemo ). I don’t know about anyone else, but my thoughts swing from day to day between believing for the best news and preparing myself for the worst.

One thing I would say to you, Melanie…and maybe the nurse pointed this out to you…is that the mammogram can be inconclusive a certain percentage of the time ( as it was in my case), so don’t be alarmed if they say they need to use ultrasound or MRI scan,or if they do a needle biopsy at the clinic as the next stage. That’s what happened in my case. Just be assured the Drs. will do everything they have to, to be sure of the diagnosis. My experience has been that these Drs and nurses are wonderful,and don’t be afraid to ask anything you want to, or to talk about your anxietes. The breast care nurses,in particular, who you will probably meet on Thursday, will have time to chat with you and give you a cup of tea and a listening ear.

This is an emotional roller coaster for us all, and I think most of us have learned to cope by taking it a day at a time. Some days are good, some are aweful, most are a mixture! But this forum is an absolute Godsend. You can come on here anytime of the day or night and there is usually someone else to read your message and respond. It’s wonderful. If you do need treatment and are awake at night in the wee hours,it’s so therapeutic in itself to post your worries and concerns and know that the only people reading it are those who fully understand how you are feeling and won’t criticise you for feeling anxious or low.And to know they are thinking about you is such a help.

I’ve just come home from a four-day stay in hospital, to have some IV antibiotics, and the first thing I’m doing is coming on here to let my friends know I’m ok.That’s how important these ladies are to me.So, Melanie,so glad you’re linked in right from the start. Do let us know how you are. I’ll be praying for you to feel peaceful, if that’s ok with you, aswell as a good result, of course.

Take care,
Hug from me,
Ann xx

thank you Ann xxx all the support means a lot to me.

its another long night and i cant sleep! again! now technically its Wednesday so at least its getting closer to Thursday ----D-Dayl ol!. but it still feels like an eternity away.

am feeling a bit teary, angry, scared and even though i wish it was Thursday, I am also scared to go.

good luck - the waiting is the pits … thinking of you love FB xx

PS be prepared that you may not get all the answers you expect!

thank you Fizbix,

still cant sleep!!! i know what you are saying too FB as i know i probably will have to get a biopsy taken then wait some more !!! it says on my letter that i may get the results on the same day from this but i don’t think i will as my appointment is at 4pm ??? at least i will get my mammogram results so at least thats a start. just worried about it all.

Hi Melanie - hopefully you were able to get some sleep today! Looks like we’re both getting the same results tomorrow - from mammo. I know I’m going to have a biopsy - as the u/s tech told me at my mammo and u/s appt that she would normally do one then and there, but needed to consult the consultant first. I’m hoping that this isn’t tomorrow…but then again, the sooner the biopsy is done, the sooner I know results. My appt. is at 1030 tomorrow, so at least I can get it over with in the morning and call back to clarify anything I have misunderstood - hopefully in a moment of jubilation. I am going alone - thinking of taking a voice recorder with me to record the appt…I know that things can go in a blur when you’re anxious. But hubby has given notice at his current school, and has had nothing but grief over previously booked training days, field trips, day off for the family to celebrate Canada Day in London last week - he’s done that every year for the past six years he’s been there, but got grief about it this year. So, I’m not asking him to take any time off to come with me, and he knows how stubborn I am too - when I say no don’t come…I MEAN no, don’t come! The rotten part will be if it’s not good news, waiting till he gets home from school to tell him. Good news, I’ll stop and pick up some sushi and meet him for lunch :slight_smile:

Hoping that all goes well for you tomororw Melanie - I’ll be thinking of you
xoxo

I will be thinking of you both tomorrow - hope all goes well. Looby

thanks again everyone, fingers crossed for us all with these results. i’ll probably get a biopsy tomorrow too but dont know if i’ll get the results of that as well as my mammogram results tomorrow. i did eventually sleep in the wee hours of the am!!! had a rough night really with worrying too much but i know i am not alone. my husband has to work tomorrow too so my best friend is coming with me. i dont think i could handle being alone if i got bad news. but then again we have to battle on as even if it is at least i will know more than today!.
found a great song today on youtube, it is Run for Life by Melissa Etheridge, its amazing, the song has inspired me and helped me through last night. i would recommend every single woman to listen to it. Melissa is a BC survivor and amazing ambassador for BC.

thinking of all of you
((((((((((((big hugs))))))))))))
Mel xx

Hi Mel,

thinking of you today and keeping everything crossed for you,

Take care and be sure to let us know how you get on,

Kelly
-x-

well heres how it went.

went to clinic, got taken quickly, the consultant examined me and said he couldn’t feel a palpable lump. weird as i do so did my doctor and nurse???
the mammogram was however normal so thats great. there is a dense area where i feel the lump so to be 100% they will give me an ultrasound so have to back in 2 weeks for that.
more waiting!!??!!!
i feel better but at the same time am now a wee bit upset about the doc not feeling my lump. it knocks my confidence in knowing what my own breasts feel like.

has this happened to anyone else??

Hi Melanie - the lump I had felt was not the one biopsied yesterday - they say that was a ‘lucky find’ on the ultrasound. I can feel a mass, my doctor can feel a mass, and a mass showed up on ultrasound where I said I could feel it, and this is what the ultrasound tech said she would normally biopsy except didn’t want to because she didn’t want to disturb the other ‘lucky find’ - yet yesterday, the new doc at the breast clinic could not feel it, and then sent me back down for a core biopsy on the ‘lucky find’ rather than the mass …confusing to say the least! I will be asking about this when I go back for results of the core biopsy.
I hope you’re feeling more positive today :slight_smile:

Hi Mel,

I’m amazed you are having to wait two more weeks for an ultrasound scan! When i went i had the mammogram, ultrasound scan and core biopsy all in the same day!
maybe mine looked more suspicious though, on the surface.

let us know how you are. Thinking of you, it’s the worst time, the waiting.

(((HUG)))

Ann xx

hi everyone,

(((((((hugs to all))))))))

i feel numb just now and angry that i have to wait this long. keep thinking that they should have given me an earlier time for my appointment i had. then maybe i would have got an ultrasound on the same day. dont they know that waiting makes you crazy??? i am also annoyed coz the doctor seemed so offhand about it. as if it was all in my imagination that i have a lump. how come i feel a lump, so did my doctor and nurse yet he didnt? how come i have to wait ages? i’m trying to be positive about it as he said my mammogram showed nothing abnormal. but do mammograms show everything up in younger women, i,m 35. i still feel a lump in my breast and this is where there is a dense area in the mammogram.???

i’m sorry you have to wait so long. i never had to wait more than a week. can you phone up and ask to be put on a cancellation waiting list saying you can go at short notice.
i found a second lump in my other breast by using that gel glove for checking breasts anyway it never showed up in the mammogram but showed up clearly with the ultrasound -
was told second lump was a cyst - hope the doc has got it right!

sending you a big hug!

im not coping very well, feel low and confused and angry about everything. it seems that everyone expects me to cope and i feeli have to for everyones sake, but its hard keeping up the act. i just feel like i’m in the middle of a tornado and am about to be thrown out of it into god knows where. does that make any sense? i cant cope with this. yet i feel guilty as i know that other women do cope with worse. i wish it would all just end and then i wouldnt have to think about it anymore.

Melanie, so sorry you’re feeling like this. I’m waiting for results of my WLE on Wednesday. Like you I feel I have to put a brave face on, even when I’m on here I find myself mimimizing the screen if my husband wanders past. I don’t feel angry, just very very low as I was suffering from depression anyway when this all started. Don’t ever feel guilty for the way you feel, we all have to get through this in our own ways. Other people are worse off than us and yet that does not minimize our own problems. You are young and the breast tissue will be dense from what I understand. I’m 51, no lumps or symptoms, just picked up on 1st routine mammogram. I must have older less dense tissue. (falling to bits in other words) Stay in the middle of your tornado now, it sounds like a safe place to be, I want to get in there with you. Sending you a big hug ((((((((((((((Jilly)))))))))))))))))))))))

Mel, I hope you didn’t misunderstand what I said about your tornado. You are safe in the middle and they all lose strength in the end. Hopefully it will and deposit you in a softer place, xxxxxx Jilly