Hi all from a PJ’d me! Before I start I wanted to say thank you all for your words of support where would I be without this place to offload? Crabbit I am sure we are all guilty of the tearful in public thing I tried to explain to my boss and for some reason the tears just would not stay put! not very dignified sitting there blubbering and trying to talk! I am now getting a rep for tears at the most peculiar and sometimes irrelevant times! No idea where it all comes from just when you think you have done with it all the blooming reservoir overfills again! Mind you I was told that we are all like buckets and we all have liquid filling up our buckets day to day then sometimes something comes along that fills it up too much and it has to flow out! Not sure about being a bucket but I’m sure I could fill one some days! What a miserable day it is here some covering of snow but it rained all night long I even got up twice to check as we were predicted a huge fall hmmmm? Actually glad but that freezing rain was up near to you Doz I kept thinking of you driving to work for nights in the dark and goodness knows so sending hugs to you lovely and hoping it all goes well.
Thank you Janice my friend has lived in Aus for about 22 years and been to see me 3 times but we have been unable to go see her there, she has her children who like mine are grown up, we text most weeks now ,during chemo she text me every day and would chivvy me sometimes with sweary words to get me going again (not in a bad way!) she herself went through all this as they found her nodes positive but could not find her primary so here she is twenty years later giving me amazing support from 12,000 miles away! I do hope you get to go sometime and I bet you look forward to seeing your son. Technology is wonderful for that it keeps us in touch thankfully!
Doz whilst we are on the subject have you got a date for Afgan Dan? I forget when mothers day is!
ami I do feel for you love it must be a right royal pain this awful weather and maybe the ache is to remind you not to do anything that would cause you more pain the cold will probably make it hurt too so keep warm and take care. I tend to think of us as flutterbys desperate to try our wings so we flutter to check them out!
Jane snap ! Poor you I think we are fairly fragile these days and it does not take much to knock us back!Yes I have a sleeve and was diagnosed after realising the arm ached and any bra/top hurt so much at the end of the day so now have my bullet proof vest and sleeve but at least I can see the elbow and wrist joint these days , I am so sorry for the tablets for life I bet that knocked you back a few steps! I think an emergency plug into the flutterby bank is required!
We have a couple of solar butterflies which we put in the garden come summer and I just imagined us all fluttering around our group solar panels I know! what a nutter it just tickled me to think we could do that mentally speaking but the picture won’t go away!
To all our flutterbys as Jane said WE WILL get there mind you where is that? it sort of takes us back to the initial question really but I can see days where we do flutter more and wonder if the world is ready for what I reckon will be a bunch of very feisty but fragile flutterbys? Take care all our flutterbys and keep warm Doz be VERY careful and yes me too reaching for a great big group hug! Em xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hi Girls from a VERY white East Yorkshire…
Nights are over for this week and snow has finally stopped!!!
Tho I wont speak too soon as it looks as if were due more next week…
Had a very slow journey to work last night it took nearly an hour (normally 20 mins) and it was a bit scarey!!! even for me as I dont mind driving in it usually… I know!!! I’m MAD!!!
There were plenty of staff who rang in to say they could’nt make it?? Yet the ones like me who live quite a way out in the sticks made it…? And do you know no’one thanked us for making the effort… we ARE just a number 
I cant believe how mild it is today tho, and most of the roads have cleared quite quick overnight, There is still around 4/5" in my garden and it looks sooooo pretty 
Still no results… just rang and they said it could be mid week or towards the back end of next week so hey ho… more waiting
Em… Mothers day (Afghan Dan day) is 18th March so not too long before I can hug him again :)Had a good chat with him on Skype yesterday he said its turned really cold in Afghanistan and they woke up to “snow” on Tuesday… tho only on the mountains but he said it made it feel more homely with reports of snow here!!
He’s doing fine and said time is passing so quickly… lets hope his time home does’nt pass as fast!!
I’m so glad you got your holiday sorted Em still cant believe the amount of stress they have caused you… its a sad day when the support you should be getting from work has’nt been there and they of all people should realize how important it is for you after the past year… just makes me think that we are just a number applies to most places nowadays xxhugxx
Well Ben is in for a treat as i’m just about to shed the PJ’s and take him on the field for a run… no I wont be running flutterbys I shall take a nice stroll!!!
Janice… you are right a bit of warmth and sunshine would’nt go amiss hope you are keeping well and what a good thing for you if your son can come back for a holiday I know Daniels not away forever but I do miss him so I’d be in bits if he lived that far away bless ya xx
Stay warm and cozy flutterbys big hugs as always xxxxxxxxxhugsxxxxxxxxx
Hi Girls
Got up this morning to a light covering of snow again which had turned to ice and it was my morning for the hospital. OH went to spread some salt on the path for me only to find the metal gate had frozen shut! I had to wait an hour for an xray on my wrist but the surgeon was delighted with the progress and was so pleased she declared me a text book case!! Whoopee! She said ‘In fact, I’m going to chuck you off!” and gave me big hug as she was so happy with her handiwork. She told me they’d had 13 fractures of the wrist last Monday, due to the weather so it was a change to see someone 6 weeks on after their surgery. No wonder she was pleased to discharge one!
Don’t know how you keep awake and keep going with your shifts, Doz - no wonder you forgot your dentist appointment! I’ve thought about you driving at night in this lot, horrible, but fancy not getting a thank you for making an effort to get there! I’m keeping my fingers crossed for your results, flutterby. I think the sauna/steam & jaccuzi will have done you more good than a swim this time of year!
It must have been horrid for you Emmy, having the trouble at work. As long as things go smoothly it’s not so bad but it’s not easy to cope with upsets when you’re not quite well. I would have joined in and turned on the taps if I’d been at the side of you ……or maybe not……!!! What with Doz and the finger nails, we have fiendish ways, us inscrutable butterflies. After the upset though, you realise it’s really knocked the stuffing out of you. You have the weekend to recover I presume? So come Monday, you’ll be looking at her fingernails then???
Had a supermarket delivery today, the driver says everyone’s panic buying due to the weather.
Jane, it makes your heart jump into your mouth when you get a statement you’re not expecting, doesn’t it? But the main thing is you’re clear and if it means staying on medication to keep well, it’s a shock, but it is positive news. Hope your feeling a bit better after your fall, I know, it really shakes you up, so hope you’re fluttering that wing again very soon!
I really hope you get to see your son, Janice. It would be wonderful if you could visit though. I bet your neighbour who fell is so glad to have you living there, but don’t go slipping down as well, will you!
Keep warm this weekend
Hugs Ami xx
Hello flutterbies,
Glad there have been a lot of positives in amongst the rubbish we are all dealing with! You are a lovely bunch. Still no snow here. I am grateful though. Last year was so bad here, it was up to mid thigh and I remember trailing the mile and a half into town carrying a 3 year old. It took two hours and then no bread in shops so I developed very good bread making muscles. But this year I am prepared ladies. We have a bread maker, just a pity it makes awful bread!
I have changed cars too. Because RADS was over Oct and Nov and I had to travel to Edinburgh for it I was in a panic that my old megane would not cope if snow came early. Had to get towed last year and abandon my car on two occasions. It just wasn’t coping so have a new (old) car to test when snow proper comes. We shall see.
I am in PJ’s, hubby engineered a lovely long lie for me and then took Lewis out for the morning so now I’m slobbing around.
I swithered with making appt with GP for anti d’s this week but have staved it off with a haircut and two new frocks! Gosh I am getting a little selfish and self indulgent. First haircut since I had it cropped at start of treatment because it was falling out on Tamoxifen.
Jane sorry you are having problems with lymphoedema, another thing I have been lucky enough not to deal with.
Doz you will be counting the days. Thank goodness for skype. Our oldest finished his second tour in Afghanistan last year and should be in GB for a while. He’s in York just now but moves to Stafford soon.
Love your positivity Em and you are so right. Every now and then I give myself a big kick up the bum and was doing so yesterday putting it all back into perspective. At the same time I’m not diminishing any of the crappy things we are going through, big group hug back to you all too.
Carolyn x
Oh and I forgot Em,
I only work 4 days a week. have Fri Sat Sun off, but Fri is still frantic and busy, I am now finding that I am not rested up for Monday any more. I just feel as if I’ve never been away?
To all you girls who are working shifts and long hours (and even those of you who aren’t but have your own challenges). I am sending virtual rest and relaxation vibes.
Cx
Morning Flutterbys
Still got snow but its SUNNY woo hoo tho i’ve just had the post lady drop a parcel off and her hair was all white and frozen bless her she’s been out in it for hours and said the air is freezing on her… poor woman!!!
Ami… Brilliant news about your wrist it must be a relief to not have to go back again… just take it easy hon and stay on your feet xx
Carolyn… It was the same here in our little village last year, it started snowing just after my op and we were snowed in for 5 days… not that it mattered for me but it must have been awful for others, the exit out of our village onto the main road is uphill and no matter how much the gritters… gritted it just froze over everynight, our cars were frozen into the spots they were parked on the road as the traffic coming to the Station pushed all the snow up against them ,and it froze to the wheels… A couple opposite went out with spades one day to clear their car and the guy put his spade though his tyre!!! it was crazy as people were getting into the village but could’nt get out!! I’m hoping it does’nt get that bad this year… as pretty as it looks its not nice!
Hope your new car is more reliable for you… to make sure you get your rehab (shopping) done ha ha!!! love it what a brilliant alternative to more pills… and more enjoyable too!!!
I dont know how you coped with your son being on active duty… its been bad enough for me knowing Daniels there, even tho he’s not in the thick of it its still a worry with him being with the troops… bless them all and their familys xxx
Had to do a quick turn around for work this week I forgot I was on a double shift tomorrow so up at 5.30am! Its not nice when we get mixed shifts in one week especially when its nights and days… at least I’m not back till next Saturday night after tomorrow, A FULL WEEK OFF to be a lazy PJ person
It is all starting to take its toll tho… energy levels are rubbish on my days off, I just sat and cabbaged yesterday, Ben only got a short walk much to his disgust, he was’nt happy with me at all!!
Thrush??? has gone on its own so not sure what that was all about??
But the pains in and around BC site and rib/shoulder are still there cant believe its taking so long to get results back… fed up now!
Hope your all well and keeping warm and cozy love n hugs
xxxhugxxx
Eeek! Double shift! Don’t know how you do it Doz…
On call this weekend - out yesterday evening and again this morning, but maybe that’ll be it. We had a lovely walk with the dog in the (still) snow… beautiful with the blue sky and sunshine. I’m just much more cautious about falling over (for some strange reason!!!) I’ve got a colleague covering this evening, while I go out to dinner… (a bit too far away to respond in a timely manner)… and it’s the first time ever, I think, that we’ve been told “not to dress for dinner” !!! The mind boggles as I write that phrase! What they mean is, no ties or jackets required… Don’t normally move in those sort of circles! Wonder if the pattern on my wings’ll be OK? It should be interesting/an experience. At least as I’m on call (once I get home) I won’t be drinking and therefore less likely to put foot in mouth!
Great news about car/wrist/count-down etc…
keep fluttering! (and thanks so much for your support/understanding -means more than I can flutter)
Jane
Hi Jane
Could I be so bold as to ask what your obvious commitment to work is… had a few guesses but i’m sure i’m wrong
Whatever it is your a busy lady? xxhugxx
you’ll see me around Doz… I’m a hospital chaplain, and I LOVE what I do… I had serious withdrawal symptoms when I couldn’t work, until the chemo made me too ill to care. I also felt really guilty about the burden I was putting on the (very)small team… even though I wasn’t doing it deliberately! An afternoon of feet up though, before work tomorrow morning (taking the service), and hopeful of no more call-outs! Then Monday is a new week… not much chance of getting the time back, but at least I feel it’s “in the bank” and if I feel tired and need to go home early (and there’s nothing urgent) I can do so WITHOUT feeling guilty! off to the comfy bench! I think this thread is so vital for survival - I keep being taken aback by the time it takes me to recover from enormously painful situations, or the times I feel suddenly weepy (for no particular reason) - when everyone expects me to be strong and there for them. Thanks so much flutterbies! love Jane
Ah Jane I did wonder you all do an amazing job a very difficult one at times so like myself the tears can turn on at the slightest thing…with good reason and again the meds dont help…
We have an Irish Priest who comes onto our Ward and he’s the most amazing character i’ve ever met in all my life… I love him to bits
He brings so much to patients and staff alike, He arranges trips to Llourdes for under priviledged children and familys in his area and i’m told subsidises it himself… One of a kind
Dont work too hard and dont ever feel guilty… I’m sure any amount you do for the service will be gratefully accepted xxxxxhugxxxxx
Hi all I hope you have kept cosy and warm as good flutterbys should! Well guess what? I went to good old M&S to be measured for bra and had a really good lady who knew her stuff (30 years in the job!) she advised that I only buy two bras for now as I am still having steroids and may lose some weight? Here’s hoping! Funny how I never noticed how much the breast had shrunk on my bc side as lympho has gone down thanks to taping!
Doz a double shift? Go steady and have lots of rest when you are done! Whew! Makes me tired just thinking about it! Gonna need to plug into the bank so you can flutter.
Jane I sort of guessed what you did, it must be hard trying to deal with others when you have all this going on! One of the nicest men I knew was a wonderful vicar and I have to say I am not at all religious, but on meeting this guy I told him I liked his frock to which he replied “Don’t ask me to take it off! It’s so hot I’ve only got my boxers on!”, he made me laugh and we became firm friends.He never made any point of pushing anything he did however tell me despite my protestations I was a spiritual person which I can live with!
I am going to wear my nice new comfortable underwear as I have been wearing some cheap ahh bra things which rolled up underneath and strangled my tummy ,not comfortable at all! Also will need to wear the bullet proof thing if I have a flare up so sexy! NOT! Lets face it we like to feel nice but comfort as ami and I agreed is top of our list! I hope you are being good ami?
Well lovely flutterbys one and all going for shower then PJ’s!!!
Take care and Doz plug in and also don’t forget them spoons for later! Big group hug Em xxxxx
Got them in my pocket Em xxxx
Love it Em! Funniest exchange I had was with a new matron who, outside the lifts, said “How’s God then?” (in quite a challenging sort of a way), and I replied “She’s fine thanks” - Matron fell about and said “we’re going to get on” - and we do! Very well indeed… great young lady! She was chatting to another lady at the time (who I didn’t know) and my guess is she WAS a churchy person, cause she looked SOOO shocked at me! Wicked chaplain! Has a sense of humour!
Stocking up with spoons as well… it was -12 coming back last night (from dinner, not work!) so the country lanes were interesting! Glad to get under a warm duvet I can tell you!
Apparently it’s supposed to thaw today, and get mild again… I rather like the cold - always feels healthy (kills bugs), but it is a bit treacherous, so maybe thaw is good… have a great PJ day… Hoping our wings don’t wilt in the cold… love to all… Jane x
Sending spoons I have hidden a couple for tomorrow (full one meetings morning and afternoonzzzzzzzz) But got a couple for you ---------O ----------O along with some hugs Em xxx
Jane bad woman you will do for me!
Hope you girls are keeping warm we are having some quite good weather its cold but no snow or frost and no wind.I think we have our own weather system here.Hope it continues this way.Well not to brag but back walking and did 4 miles yesterday and 4 again today need to get in training as doing race for life in July and daughter in law has signed for the 10K this year. I did the 5K last year(walking)and raised £400 for cancer research.I was really pleased with myself so hope to do just as well this year.
Jane I guessed you were something to do with religion and hospitals.Good to see you have a wonderful sense of humour.We had a vicar here years ago and he was brilliantly funny and didn’t mind whether you went to church or not he still made you feel good.
Doz I don’t know how you cope with changing shifts like you do it must be really hard adjusting.It was bad enough just working nights which is unnatural anyway.I am well aware of being just a number I didn’t even get a retirement card from my bosses after 13 and half years of slogging for them.Never mind won’t be working for anyone else again.
Emmy know what its like to be lop-sided but I to am back wearing bras and have my prosthetic to make them appear equal so not too bad now.Hope work has improved for you and not upsetting you.
Ami do take care as you don’t want to fall again.My neighbour is doing quite well and has been able to get out a bit as its dry here and she now just has a splint on so she feels she can do a bit more.
Take care everyone and keep snuggled up love and big hug Janicexxxx
Been a lovely busy family weekend and what lovely weather today! Hope you’re all staying warm flutterbies. Just a quick check in tonight! x
Hope you like this picture. I asked my dog if this was his new Mother Teresa look. ‘No’ he said, ‘I’m just popping out to the corner shop for some taters.’
Jane, I kind of guessed your profession. There’s a lot resting on your shoulders so there’s no wonder you suddenly feel like weeping sometimes. A few years ago we contacted our local minister to give quite a lot of new stuff for fundraising, and although we’re not churchgoers he often dropped in after that for coffee and he became a friend. When I was dx with BC he was right there, taking me to and from chemo and bloods and when he couldn’t make it, arranged for someone else to take me. I don’t know what I’d have done without his support. A true Christian, a lovely man, and I’m not one of his flock. I said I didn’t know how he managed to give so much to others without suffering himself as he was so busy without having me to think about. Love your quick thinking reply to ‘How’s God’!
Doz, you must feel a bit Zombie-ish , all the shift work. I feel concerned that it will affect your health. Hope you don’t get too run down and pick up winter ailments, flutterby! I’ve been watching the documentary ‘Confessions of a Nurse’ - all the behind the scenes of their work. Very interesting and just what you all have to put up with!
I’d considered one of those soft bra’s, Emmy, but I kept thinking there might not be enough support. Hearing what you’ve said, I’m glad I didn’t, but you know me - anything for the comfiest.
Carolyn, a hairdo and 2 new frocks has to be better than happy pills anytime. I think anything that lifts you has a positive knock on effect for those closest to you. Go and do it again soon!
Janice, you have every right to brag!! Well done you for your contribution to cancer research. Yes, as you say, I bet you were really pleased with yourself. I think that’s terrible that you didn’t get an acknowledgment when you left work.
Hugs Ami xx
.
A bit pooped tonight Flutterbys but had to comment on your dog Ami…
I LOVE HIM he’s sooooooo gorgeous x
Love to you all whatever your doing and wherever you are…Take good care! Going to check the draw in the kitchen for a pocket full of spoons for tomorrow My bed is calling night night Flutterbys xxhugxx
Hello girls,
Ami, what a lovely pic. Popping to the shop for some taters did make me giggle.
Ah yes the hairdo and frock effect has subsided rather! But it was lovely whilst it lasted. Now I’m thinking I may try to ebay my rowing machine and swap it for a running machine. I used to enjoy running such a lot but with hubby working away so much I’m not getting out, Must investigate I think! Next avenue to try pre pills!
Take care everyone. Carolyn xx
The lovely dog makes me think of “what a big nose you’ve got grandma”… all the better to _ _ _
Night flutterbies… Just about got through the day, hoping to get loads of spoons overnight! Didn’t sleep well last night, so need to catch up a bit…
sleep well fragile friends
Jane