Doz - thank goodness you went private! But, you shouldn’t neet to. My DD is a physio and I’ve just told her your story… she says A&E would only give out a sheet of general exercises usually (when the condition isn’t serious) but that they would taylor the exercises on the sheet to suit, watching how someone coped (or didn’t) and make sure they were done in a way to not cause more damage… (just background info for your letter)whgich should definitely be written! How long do you both have to wait for the MRI results? And, when exactly is Afghan Dan home? BIG hug, and another one!
Regarding staff survey Cackles - I can only say that I was in a meeting yesterday where the Chief Exec was taking our staff survey very seriously - unfortunately, the stats on that don’t show anything like the problems I’m picking up, (which is a real bummer)but they were taking it seriously. I’ve convinced them that staff morale directly affects patient care!!! (No brainer!)
I’ve got the day off for my C-Burfday, so I’ve only just got up… lucky me! Keep us posted when you can Doz…
You flutterbys are such a tonic…
Cackles no’one is ever a semi stranger on here people flutter in when they feel the need and my goodness what an absolute blessing that you all do as I may have been climbing some distant wall in oblivion by now!! all or any input is welcomed :)xxx
I have been advised by the Consultant to get in touch with PALS so that in some way it may change the train of thoughts in A&E regarding back issues… He was mortified that she had been left so long with no back up (no pun intended apart from my lovely GP who rang this morning at 8 to see how the Consultation went… but sadly they dont have enough clout to move things along quicker when the hold ups are appointment based!
As for NHS I have always defended them to the hilt as ward work is so different and any tiny slip up is deemed a disciplinary (think thats spelt right??) so yes some things ARE brilliant some things very sadly lacking… staff issues should be high on the agenda as without a clear minded staff member… well need I say more? I’m so dissapointed at the way i’ve been treated and in the cold light of today I’m feeling quite resigned to the fact that my number is’nt very important in the greater scheme of things and will be soul searching my future prospects with them!
We are supposed to be a family friendly organisation?? it just is’nt happening and sadly my family WILL always come first!
I too am worried about the consequences of Vikki’s back as the length of time its been… permanent damage is always a worry and till the MRI is done… we wont know! referal has gone in so now i’m praying the NHS will not drag their feet on this!
She is starting assessment in the morning for Epidural injections to relieve the pain till scan is done and results come through… end of my tether does’nt come into it anymore
Enough… you did make me laugh at all your needs bless you I know it is’nt a laughing matter but so good to hear your sense of ridicule at all the things that come along with this journey of ours, i’m sure your beautiful with or without the frills Cackles as are all the girls on here, I look at some women who like some of you lost their hair and think how serene (if thats the right description) they look when they just go for it without cover… what a medal and my admiration is endless xxxx
Ami Em Janice Jane Cackles and anyone I may have forgotten (SORRY XX) YOU ALL GIVE ME INSPIRATION!!!
Ami and Jane I so hope the bad days are better on this new day and sending spoons hugs kisses with a marshmallow topping for the hips :)if mine are widening then I dont want to leave you out xxx
Em sweetie H must be iminent… and also nearing an end for you I cant imagine the mixed emotions that must bring xx sending the veins some spoons and you some hugs xx
Me… well I think all this has taken my mind of my aches pains and sleepless nights and surprisingly I feel fit to fight this day ahead?? not sure where this positivity has appeared from but me thinks the supply of loving spoons has arrived bless you all!
massive group hug and love to you all wherever and whatever you are aspiring to do xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxhugsxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
4 days to Dan coming home flying to Kandahar tomorrow for de-briefing then on to Dubai Fri night then HOME SUNDAY WOOOOHOOOO!!!
Celebrate the day and the fact that you have been able to write that sweetie and have enlightened/inspired/comforted me no end with your posts you are amazing xxxhugxxx
was diagnosed with DCIS (high grade) in January this year and had a WLE first but then needed a mastectomy as the margins weren’t clear. I was devastated but somehow got through the dreaded appointments and surgery. I am now one month post mastectomy and thought I was doing really well when bam…out of the blue… reality struck home and I just sobbed into the bath yesterday, adding to its volume!! Is this normal?
Hi Elsa glad you have logged on as we have all been there and yes it is normal to be the way you are feeling.Now you have had your surgery reality has suddenly kicked in and you will have lots to deal with but rest assured the lovely flutterbys on this site are here to support you.Thanks to the wonderful Doz who started it.So do keep logging in.
Happy C day Jane hope you have a restful day love your reflective thoughts going to try it later.
Doz your daughter must be having an awful time but she is so lucky having her mum there to help her and hold her.The flutterby is me when I did the race for life last year.I never wore pinks as a child as bright red hair clashed so now I can wear pink and love it as hair can be whatever colour I like.
Ami I am just off into the garden again tried freesia once but no success I think sea air here does for a lot of sensitive flowers and they are hard to grow.
Cackles nice to hear from you.You reminded me I must shave legs for tomorrow as going for pre-op and have to have ecg so pads won’t stick to my hairy legs ha ha.
Emmy hope you are doing okay Thinking of you all and hope you are enjoying the sunshine when you can love and hugs Janicexxxxx
In addition to the support here please feel free to call our helpline on 0808 800 6000, the lines are open weekdays 9-5 and Sat 9-2 and our team are here to offer support, information and a listening ear
I am posting a link to the BCC ‘Newly diagnosed’ information page where you will find publications and further support ideas which you may find helpful:
Hi Elsa you have certainly come to a lovely group who are there as you will see reading our posts,it’s been such a support through thick and thin! Welcome flutterby and yes it is normal in fact sometimes it just hits you and tears are a way of washing away the tension which given our histories isn’t surprising! We all use this site to share our good and bad days. There is always support so we laugh and cry together, such amazing women who I think of when in a bad place they can make me smile and I love that we are all flutterbys who know we have changed but we will be a ‘new us’ and it’s a lovely thought that we are becoming colourful flutterbys!
Doz I am sending you hugs for both of you, it’s so hard to watch someone you love going through this and how sad to be let down like that! I am sending you more spoons along with mahoosive hugs xxx
ami,cackles, Janice, Jane and all you lovely flutterbys I hope you enjoy those blue skies and sending any required spoons along with a big group hug Em xxxxx
Thanks for your support and yes ‘H’ tomorrow eeek!
I’ve just caught up with all the news over the past couple of days. Doz what a traumatic time you have been through and are continuing to struggle through. I have no words to add to the great advice and support you have been given. Have you written your letter yet? At the very least I suspect it would be hugely cathartic! And bless you because through all this you have kept a ‘virtual smile’ and kept your cheeky sense of humour. Hard when it seems your employers would rather have someone crash and burn than support them in tough times!
Here I go trying to catch up with the rest of you lovelies. Forgive me if I miss anyone.
Firstly hello Elsa and how lovely to have you on the forum. Personally I cannot think of a better place to have a cry than the bath! It’s a bumpy old journey this BC, and harder when you are trying to be strong for everyone else. I had been fine then popped into my Maggies post op pre RADS and promptly blubbed as I walked in the door! They are a wonderful, warm resource. If you think it may do you good you could try them?
Hi Janice, I had never read the explanation of flutterby before so now I now. Have a vision of you in pink! I have just started training for a 10k for BCC but am so slow. Right back down to 15 min miles. Hoping I speed up before Sept lol! I have a huge bloated belly just now which doesn’t help.
Thanks for your reflection Jane, lovely words. So sorry you had a blip! Remember to take care of yourself. Congrats on your C birthday too!
Cackles I loved your list of ‘things’. Bikini line?? There is an oxymoron. Bikini brief perhaps! I was lucky enough 6 or 7 years ago to get laser hair removal on legs and bikini. Heartily recommend it but it is very expensive now!
Ami, you had a stressful day too. I hope things have settled down and you are beginning to relax and have some ‘me time’.
Hi Emmy, glad you’ve been enjoying the blue skies! Been dry cold and bright here. Don’t mind that at all. I even got into the garden until I realised it wasn’t quite warm enough to fling the sun room doors too wide lol!
Take care girls, sorry I’m not checking in much. Bogged down with beeping work every night.
I’ve had a better day today. Had some urgent business to sort out yesterday and tried on the phone for 2 hrs which got me nowhere. Press 1 for this, 101 for that ….you’re in a 10 min queue….spoke to different people, went round in circles and ended up dropping everything and rushing out to speak to someone human who gave me some kind of reassurance. Came home to find the dog ill but OH had a meal cooking, which was lovely, but that frantic worry dominated the day and was the first thing I thought of when I woke up this morning. Phew!!! Today calmer but just before I logged on, the cat was sick all over the lounge carpet. Still, after all that I’m just glad I can do it all!!
Doz: So glad you’ve felt fit to fight today, hope the day went well for you both. 3 days countdown now!! And you still have, as Carolyn says, your cheeky sense of humour. Remember what I said the ‘Z’ in Doz stands for??
Emmy: Hope you’ve been feeling no worse with the Herceptin. Not long to go now until you finish…roll on summer! Another one bites the dust tomorrow, yeah!
Janice: I was surprised last year to find my Freesias flowering but there weren’t many. I’m not sure why they’re so difficult to grow!! Luuurv your Barbie pink outfit!!
Cackles: You’re definitely no stranger on here, and so glad you keep popping in, you’re such a tonic with your witty humour. Your hair etc will soon come back but it takes a time to grow properly, even after that! Hair is such an issue with us, isn’t it?
Jane: I really love your 1 yr reflection, I relate to it so well and the bottom line is lovely! Mine anniversary is 2 yrs this month. If it’s any consolation I think you look beautiful and healthy. Hope you’ve had a beautiful day. ‘Aaaw fanks’ and description really made me smile.
Elsa: I’m glad you’ve posted on this thread. The ladies on here are so lovely. I’m sorry to hear about your sudden down feelings. It’s very early days for you to expect anything other and wouldn’t be natural if all you’ve been through didn’t have this effect, flutterby. I had a MX 2 yrs this month. My best friend for a blubber is the shower, so let it come then wash it down the plug hole and come out with a deep breath of relief ready to face the world. Are you having chemo etc? Do let us know. All the things you feel are all part of your recovery. Don’t expect too much of yourself, be pampered and don’t feel bad about anything. You’ll get there eventually. Sending a massive hug and remember, we do understand. Post soon.
Ami xx
thank you to all you flutterbys for making me feel so welcome…it is very much appreciated. Was just wondering what the collective noun for a group of flutterbys could be…any suggestions??
Hi Elsa and welcome to the flutterby forum
Collective noun for Flutterbys…
“A group of beautiful women” is that a collective noun?? ha ha!! It is now!!!
Winging spoons and hugs and handholding Em hope the H is "H"assle free for you today xxxx
Still awaiting MRI for Vikki, could’nt get her in the car for assessment yesterday for the Epidural treatment so tried to get Transport?? spoke to the Nurse in charge who turned out to be one of my old Mentors and she let me do the assessment at home Swabs/BP/ questionaire etc so trotted off to pick up the swabs etc and I phoned her back with it all… dropping swabs in on my way to work later as its just across from where my Ward is, so that was so helpful now just need transport to get her to the ward next wed for procedure, so its on the move!! Still waiting for MRI app, but as long as things are moving then were both happy! Well she’s not happy as such but… hey ho a bit closer to being sorted out
3 days and counting to Afghan’s return Heads all over the place sad for Vikki happy to see Daniel!! oh my!!!
He leaves today for de-briefing then flies to Dubai friday night… he has been told if he’s there early enough he may get on an earlier flight WOOOHOOO!!! Wont hold him to it tho as it might not happen!
How quickly have these past 4 months gone?? he left at the end of Nov!! and now heading home for a few days
My Dr had sent a referal for me to see a physio re pains in shoulder and ribs… through all this turmoil i’d forgotten about myself!! and i’ve got an app, for monday morning It seems referal is the word of the week in this old house!
I’m on a weeks annual leave next week so the way things are going its all slotting into that… not much chance for rest but peace of mind is just as good.
Hope your all fluttering gently and the weather has remained clear wherever you girlies are love and hugs always xxxxhugxxx
Ps Hav’nt written any letters yet… think we need to get some stress relief first or I may just utter too many profanitys the way i’m feeling xx
Hi flutterbys just a quick one as it’s time to hunker down in PJ’s a bit dopey! Had results from wonderful BCN to say mammo was clear! Cue tears but in a good way! Hubby been walking around with a grin on his face all day! Got it in one (wrist again) but wahoooo 2 left! A couple of suggestions from hubby a flurry of flutterbys, a bouquet, a fragrance, a float of flutterbys, a flirt whatever it is we are most certainly it! Happy days with Afgan Doz! Enjoy a nice time with him home and I am sure it will do Vik some good too!
Take care flutterbys and am sending both spoons along with hugs Em xxxxxxx
Hope the grin stays Em…!!! Good news indeed! time to celebrate? We know who WILL be celebrating this weekend!!! Countdown continues…
This week I’d done an extra day’s hours by the end of Tuesday… had some really good patient encounters; had a queue of staff in tears for different reasons inside/outside the office one day; had a bishop in to do a Confirmation and put together some “evidence” why our new chapel (being moved) should not be a completely generic “no faith” space and why my muslim colleagues still need a prayer room… AND had something on every evening AND - I am still OK - seem to have recovered the old energy this week! Yay! Not sure I should push it, the weekend is not exactly quiet but next weekend we’re away for a long weekend - time to catch up! Have a gentle day flutterbies… we am emerging… love Jane
I thought maybe a confetti of flutterbys…
Emmy…great news that your mammo was clear, happy tears are good. When I was told I didn’t need any other treatment after my mastectomy I cried…yet again…but tears of relief. Every time I’ve seen my doctor I’ve cried, so now she just puts the box of tissues in front of me when we’re talking!
Hi Elsa
Spoons are in a thread posted earlier… a lady describes her day through illness as having a certain amount of spoons ( imaginary energy givers… suppose you could relate them to any item) to start the day with and once they were used up ie a spoon to get her through hoovering…one gone etc, then when the alloted spoons were used up it was her time for ME time!! Am I right Flutterbys??
Thats how I read it and it does work :)So if i’m wrong i’ve discovered a new way to get through the day Ha ha ha!!!
Vikki update… rang to see if app, for MRI had been alloted and the MRI Unit didnt have referal… rang secretary and she knew nothing about it?? sent her off to look again and again as I know Consultant faxed it Tuesday, and guess what it had been placed in a tray and not been dealt with!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAGH!!! What part of VERY urgent dont they understand???
Now it will have to wait till monday as Dr there who needs to sign it is,nt back till Monday afternoon SOB!!!
May as well have not gone private for what its cost and the lack of brains in that office!!! I GIVE UP!!
My physio is calling round to see her today (free of charge bless him) and is going to try to give her some relief!
I just feel so let down with everything and wonder what it takes to get something done
Roll on Sunday 2 days and counting and sooooo need to hug my boy and see Vikki’s face when he arrives it will be a moment to relive for many yrs me thinks
Dont work too hard Jane and collect some spoons next week for your well earned time away xx
Janice I hope your tests are going well? have you had them yet??? Are you in hospital… as I saw you were having pre op tests?? Hope you are ok hon xxx
Ami have you bashed the phone against the wall yet… I hate these automated answer tapes!!! xx
Cabbit dont work too hard and give yourself some me time… xxx
A confetti of butterflys aw… how sweet
Sorry if i’ve missed anyone out… OMG YES HA HA HA EM!!!
Didnt really hon was saving you till last so I would’nt run out of energy before I WOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO i’ll bet the smiles have become fixed well done sweetie a yr on and getting there bless you all and have a brilliant weekend flutter gently and rise to the occasion love and hugs always xxxxxxxxxhugsxxxxxxxxxx
Em fantastic news and lovely we can all share it and only 2 more to go you will soon be flying high.
Doz pre-op is for my surgery on 26th March when doc hopefully is going to try to re-arrange things so that I am comfortable and able to wear a bra properly as one boob is quite a bit higher than the other and a bit squashed too sounds awful doesn’t it.Anyway hope things get sorted soon for Vikki and she is pain free it is so tiring and depressing to be in so much pain and yes there are a lot of incompetent people around unfortunately.Have a fabulous weekend with Dan I have just found out that my son will be re locating to the U.K for a while later in the year so looking forward to that his wife is coming over first in May and he will follow maybe in September once he has got things sorted out down under.Hope they will be here for a while as they have nephews they have never seen and will be able to get to know them.
Jane glad you are feeling more energetic but don’t overdo it.
Ami hope today has been better for you I hate these automated systems whats wrong with old fashioned talking to people on the phone
Elsa confetti of flutterbys sounds good I can’t think of any nouns at present but will give it some thought I still cry when talking about things and just because you aren’t having more treatment doesn’t make things any better it takes time to come to accept everything and the C word is a fearful one to anybody so hang in there and a big hug is on its way to you
love and hugs to all sorry if I haven’t mentioned anyone but I think of you all Janice xxxxx
people flutter in when they feel the need and my goodness what an absolute blessing that you all do as I may have been climbing some distant wall in oblivion by now!! all or any input is welcomed :)xxx
apart from my lovely GP who rang this morning at 8 to see how the Consultation went… but sadly they dont have enough clout to move things along quicker when the hold ups are appointment based!