Hello my butterfly friends
Really enjoying reading your comments, a bit different from a couple of days ago when I cried as I wrote. I’ve seen my friend today and her app is Monday for the Ultra Sound, Mammograms etc., I offered to go with her but luckily she’s got a great hubby who insists on going with her. I’ll see her when she gets back from the hospital, so my friends. say a prayer for her that everything will be ok and she’ll come back smiling (and swearing for wasting everyone’s time lol).
Love to you all xxxAnn
She can swear all she wants Kazann its forgiven and understood and yes we,ll all say a little prayer… Hoping all will be well for her.
I,ve had a BLOODY rotten day 
Sob!!! I found both my Canarys dead this morning it was such a shock both going together Ringo (named cos he had a Beatle haircut) was 11 and a real character Rosie was 7 so why they both keeled over is a mystery??
I,ve checked my Carbon Monoxide monitor and the tester bleeps so its working?? well I hope it is?? you have nothing to test it with like the smoke alarm, I just burn toast and off it goes… I,m gutted!!
The cage I have is 4’ high and looks like a chinese pergoda and it wont fit in the shed so i,ve cleaned it out and all afternoon been looking at an empty cage so at 4.00 I went and bought 2 more…
Thats 3 pets in the garden now I lost my Labrador Alice last year to cancer… I really must toughen up it breaks my heart when I loose a pet!
I made an app, at Occy health after my Dr suggested getting physio for my knee and went this morning (with red eyes)after travelling 11 miles to the Hospital I work at, I was told I needed a referal letter from my Dr AAAAARGH!!! they could have told me before I went!! I left to go to our other surgery as ours is closed for Computer updating, the other is 5 miles away… To get the said referal signed only to find that one is closed for the same reason??? What the ****!! No village cover till next monday and I travelled 31 miles for nothing so yes girls a bloody rotten day all round!And physio wont be at least for another week now so NAFFED OFF!!
Bless you Em I,m a rubbish swimmer too but thought it would help and it has,nt really my knee played up all night so no shame Girl I just have to be “doing” i,m my own worst enemy… I had a bad experience yrs ago in Cornwall my ex was a diver (hobby) and we took an inflatable out at Marazion only 2 mins into the water and the waves rolled it over… I didnt know my backside from my frontside and I,m sure I didnt but I thought i,d nearly drowned, only to be hauled the right way up in… now you can laugh… 5’ of water!!! So I do have a fear if i,m out of my depth and being a short asse 
it does,nt take much to be out of my depth!!!
Well Flutterby’s I do hope your days have been more peaceful than mine… and yes I gave in an hour ago and the PJ’s are well and truly insitu!!!
Does anyone know how to shut 2 very noisy Canarys up AAAARGH!!!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxhugs to all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Kazann
I’m so pleased you’re feeling a bit brighter. I first posted on this thread feeling as weepy as you, so even if you’re feeling just a tiny bit better that’s something positive which will grow. I really hope your friend goes on OK on Monday! What a horrible waiting time. She will be at the forefront of your thoughts, I know. You must be very worried for her.
Oh Doz,
what a rotten day for you, losing your canaries and everything else going wrong! It’s horrid when you lose pets. I keep saying no more pets but somehow it doesn’t happen! I have an elderly dog and a stray cat which I took in in the snow last year. I couldn’t bear to see her living outside in the cold. I didn’t know if she would accept my dog, so first I bought a cat box for the garden and gave her a hot water bottle. My neighbours thought the hot water bottle hilarious. I needn’t have bothered as I soon brought her inside, my fears unfounded as they loved each other instantly! Hope you get some rest from the new noisy babies.
Emmy,
hope you had a lovely relaxing day as planned and you are now lolling about in you Pj’s. I’ve had visitors today, some in the morning and some this afternoon - it’s been lovely to see friends and family and catch up.
jmr
I think you’re right we are gradually finding ourselves again. I know what you mean about the alone feeling that has almost gone. I feel the same. We can always come on here and put in our penn’orth!
Hugs are winging their way to everyone as I close. Ami xxx
Oh Doz sorry about your pets but I am sure your new ones will be very loved I hope they don’t keep you awake with their noise its probably because they are in a new home.We lost our dog 3 years and aren’t getting another as we often go to family at weekends and had to upt Jed into kennels which he loved used to dive out of the car when we got there and run to his favourite person.I used to think he liked him more than me but when we went to collect him he was always so happy to see us.I too can’t swim too well and hate being out of my depth. We went snorkelling once when on holiday and I was so interested in the fish I didn’t realise how far out I was and nearly panicked so just put my head down so I couldn’t see how far out I wasand headed back to shore. My husband thought it was funny as apparently the water wasn’t that deep and I could have stood on the bottom.got P.Js on and chilling out big hugs to all and Kazann I’m pleased you are feeling a little better will be thinking of you and your friend and hope all goes well for her on Monday xxxxxxxx
Hell Doz you don’t do things by halves do you? I know how you feel , we too like jmr haven’t had any pets since having our cat put to sleep 7 years ago, it was so heart breaking! On the plus side hubby asked if we should have a dog as he will be retiring soon (hopefully!) and quite liked the idea as he will have time to walk it so I said he can have a boy dog if I can have a girl! So looks like we will be getting westie pups in about a years time! Lovely,I keep looking at pictures and am looking forward to it. I am with everyone on the water thing but I do get water envy when I see people in the water just can’t do it! I have tried but as soon as it gets to my waist I panic and can’t breathe!
I have had a very quiet day and yes in my PJ’s! but I haven’t felt quite the full ticket not ill but just not right! Got this weird thing with my feet they ache like anything almost burning/sore as if I had walked for miles,not sure if this is another S/E?? got so I can’t tell what is what these days but hey ho guess that comes with the territory! Well glad you are feeling a bit more upbeat Kazann it is this site I tell you! such understanding women and I don’t know what I would have done without the lovely Doz who started all this, she is funny,kind and that’s enough don’t want to be accused of making your head grow! On the serious side butterflies you have given a huge gift of being there and making sure we all count (no mean feat!) so many thanks for the kindness and as ever BIG group hug! Em xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Aw… bless you all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hi Em I think we probably all have the odd spell when we dont feel?? quite right it just seems part and parcel of the world of BC you said it yourself the gift that keeps on giving… has anyone thought to tell it we,ve had enough now
I,m sure I saw somewhere not sure where? about people having problems with their feet after Herceptin?? I might have dreamt that cos now I get the grey matter into gear I,m not sure I know what i,m talking about!!!Oh dear!! maybe I should have deleted that bit but thought i,d leave it in so you know your not on your own EEEK… HELP! And you think your not feeling right… can I PLEASE join your club…
I just put the wierd days and feelings down to my meds and try to ignore the fact that i,m also getting old!!! I WILL NOT GIVE INTO THAT!!
Your comments Em are accepted with the grace and dignity they deserve ha ha ha ha!!! Flattery gets you everywhere hon but remember this flutterbys there would,nt be a such a brilliant site without each and everyone of you xxx It would have been just me talking to myself No change there then!!
There once was a time
when my life was so low
I sat down and waffled
poured my heart out you know…
Then up popped an email
it answered my call
a soul mate emerging
to trek this long haul…
Then would,nt you know it
more girlies did write
to tell of their fears
on this brilliant site…
Where did I go
became who am I now
A flutterby merging
no one knows how…
But one thing is certain
through friends we found here
its lifted our spirits
and lessened the fear…
A smile and a thankyou
for joining the rants
sharing tears and some laughter
ALL TOGETHER… BC IS PANTS!!! xxxxxxxxxxx
Now its your turn Girls
I,m off to bed now my brain hurts… never done so much thinking ha ha!!
bless you all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxhugxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Ami
Your as bad as me I,ve taken in baby birds on numerous occasions and had some success… not always tho
The last addition was a baby dormouse with its eyes closed so very young… Did,nt think it would survive but my daughter fell in love with it and religiously fed it 2 drops of milk every 2 hrs even through the night that was 2 and a half years back… and Scrumpy as we named him is alive and kicking in a large cage!!! Could,nt set him free as he would,nt have had a clue how to survive as he was so tame!
I really need to stop but I cant i,m soooo soft!!
xxxxxxxxxxxhugsxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hi Doz
So sorry you’ve had such a rotten day, but I’m sure your pets had a better home with you than they could have had with anyone else. I had a Jack Russell dog for 19 years and then had to have him put to sleep. Everybody cried, me, my OH, the vet’s nurse and even the vet’s receptionist. We’ve never had a pet since, but now my daughter has had a bichon freize dog and the OH is absolutely besotted with it, so you never know we could be having a new little friend. We’ve just been watching a mouse in the garden but couldn’t understand why it jumped like a kangaroo. Looked it up on the net and aparently it’s a wood mouse - SO CUTE!
Hope all you other butterflies are well (as we can be) and happy.
Lots of love Ann XXX
love the poem Doz I had a few NICE tears while I read it.Hope your birdies are settling well and they give you some nice company.just about to have a nice bubble bath and P.Js on then a bit of telly and a read of my book. Must get some downloaded for when I have my op as no doubt will have plenty of time as have to rest and relax for the first week which as you girls know comes quite easily to us butterflies. have a nice evening and big hug to all jmr xxx
Hi Girls
I got woken at 6am by the most beautiful bird song… no not the dawn chorus but by Sunny and Hunny named for the pretty golden Yellow colour… I did think around 7 I wish they,d go back to sleep and they did Ahhh!!They,ve settled in well and are pretty tame and one pooped on me so off to get a lottery ticket in the morning!!!
Its really heartbreaking when you loose pets they do become part of the family, Alice went everywhere with me and was my best friend, I got her when I moved into my cottage after my divorce so we went thro a lot together and even a year on I could weep at my loss
I do have another Lab called Ben but he,s more my daughters,and no doubt she,ll take him IF she ever decides to go… I wont hold my breath as she works 3 doors away as a chef so she knows where her bread is buttered and i,d miss her so much… but would never hold her back, we got Ben from the rescue centre he was in such a state and trusted no,one and I mean no,one apart from us so bringing him round was a very hard task, we got there with him and he,s adorable now but he,s not Alice I could,nt not have a dog around they give me inspiration to get off the old rump… when its not raining like it has all today, so you can just keep looking at your lead Ben cos it aint happening!!
I,ve had a VERY lazy day and only ventured outside to empty the bin… tut tut!am now in the famous PJs and i,m going to have a VERY lazy night… shame on me!!
Have a lovely evening flutterbys love and hugs to you all
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Still wondering where I went…
Its a year ago to the hour since I had my op…
What a year flutterbys xxxhugsxxx
Canarys doing fine at least that news is worth talking about!!
Hiya Doz!! You are still there under that crap you have been carrying round and the anniversary makes it a bit harder (just for today) takes you back and makes you feel vulnerable all over again! I know how you feel sweetie but tomorrow is another day and you have got Canarys!!!
Bless you along with all the wonderful flutterbys I am sending you BIG,BIG (((((HUGS))))) Em xxx
P.S really LOVED the poem!! xx
big hugs Doz it was a year past 5th Nov since my initial diagnosis and was an odd feeling but onwards and upwards isn’t that right butterflies hugs to all jmrxxx
Morning flutterbys xx
Your so right Em tomorrow is another day and seeing as how tomorrow is now today no more reflecting It really put me in a strange mood! and yes I felt really vulnerable how stupid to be putting myself back there… EEEEK!
Onwards and upwards Jmr I like it
Hope you Flutterbys are all doing well I managed to walk WOO HOO!! all the way to the river this morning (Half a mile!!) Ben was so happy in and out the stream that feeds into the River Hull and the water was really clean so I didnt mind… Until he waded into the middle and all the mud and silt came up he then procceded to run out to me and yes SHOOK himself… I was absolutely drenched and splattered from head to toe with brown water he thought it was delightful… ONE DOG FOR SALE!!! not really!
He,s now had a bath and not talking to me ha ha!!!
I,ve now had a shower and ready to put my feet up… no PJ,s today
Love and hugs all round ((hugs)) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hi Doz
I posted you a message yesterday regarding your operation anniversary. So far it hasn’t appeared, so, sorry for that, but just wanted you to know I didn’t forget you! Can’t imagine where it’s gone, but now I’ve forgotten what I said. But they were certainly all words of positivity!
Anyway, to make you laugh, I’ve just had to spend a fortune on flea stuff due to the stray cat!!! Aaargh!!
Ami xx
Aw Ami
Bless you xx I know you girls are all behind each and every one of us as we are with you all does that make sense??
I know what i,m trying to say but the brain sometimes does,nt connect with the right words lately??
It really is a rubbish thing having a B****Y anniversary for such a life changing event and if its any help dont go there when your time comes it fair made me weep… for myself and I wont do that again I got into a right dolldrum over it thinking about the what ifs and its stupid. God knows what i,m going to be like come 24th when I go for my yearly check… My boob, the poor cockeyed thing is STILL really tender and i,ve been practising squashing it in readiness.
IT B****Y hurts so I may be the biggest wuss yet???
Sorry to hear about the fleas blessed things… I,ve been really lucky with the dog(S) and never had any trouble but then again they dont go out like cats do so its really unfortunate… blast the little buggers hon
Thanks for all your input flutterby’s your a brill set of girlies xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx((hugs))XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Hi Doz
Having got the anniversary thing over with, try and think how well you’ve done in that past year and look where you are now! My milestone has gone, I didn’t think about it too much until I finished the Herceptin some months afterwards, then I sort of thought “What now?”… felt a bit strange really, not having to go to the hospital every 3 weeks, yet I dread to think where we’d all be if we hadn’t been lucky enough to be offered treatment. Your boob still being tender proves just how long it takes for us to heal - and that’s the body - so what about the mind? Just work towards getting the 24th over flutterby, then that’s another hurdle out done. You’ve come a long way on your journey and sound such a positive lady, helping others on this forum who need you and everything. Sending you a big hug and opening my cupped hands and releasing Butterfly Doz to flutter up and off into happiness. Ami xx
Hiya Doz, don’t know about your brain, mine has been so dreadfully absent lately!Sat looking at my computer in work today for about 10 mins then had to say, “O.K I give up! what the hell is the password???”, Bless them they just all heads up told me at the same time that just made us all laugh but getting seriously concerned!!! Got the lovely H so praying the veins are not gonna play up!
Love the picture I have of ME trying to fly away!!! I reckon we all will flutterbys one and all, that light is slowly turning on at the end of the tunnel!!
big hug to all Em xxx
Ami
You just made me cry you wicked lovely flutterby xxhugxx
How you managed to put it all into perspective has really touched me… and also made me realize where would I be without you all supporting and just being there.
It is a long journey and I think that’s why I still loose my grasp on the enormity of it all at times, so bless you for your kind supportive words, my brain has definately taken a u turn lately and put me back to when I first came on here… Its just the apprehension getting the better of me… so now said… Time to get my sorry asse back into gear and as Jmr said onwards and upwards and as dear Em said it is the gift that keeps on giving… All wise words Flutterby’s love you all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Em you numpty what are you like??? dont you dare forget the password to get on here or you’ll have a lot of Flutterbys to answer to :)bless you!
Love and ((hugs)) to you all and thankyou for being there for me xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxhugsxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx