Darling buddies from May - moving on

Life after a breast cancer diagnosis Recovering from treatment
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hi, must admit my chemo finished at similar time and I still feel weary and down, think its cos have to focus on it all at time and afterwards too much thinking time.

Well girls, my lovely doctor (not yesterdays) hasnt made me pop the pills, gave me a machine to monitor over weekend when Im not panicing about it and will let me try and achieve on own so d-day tomorrow to try and turn things around, however, had a few wines tonight and chilled and half a day off work, blasted machine kept coming up error, now working and gradually as day gone on, got lower, its nearly normal at the moment, wierd eh!

Anyhow, hope eveyrone had a nice day and have a fab weekend, Im off to be princess and pea!! Sealy beds are near us and someone got me a fab deal but its huge in height and solid memory foam type, soooo, here to a better night sleep.

Lots of love x

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Ha Ladies.

You might all be suffering end of winter blues, eg SAD style symptoms. The sun’s not yet high enough to give us a good dose of vit D.

The bone scan was fine although don’t know the results yet.

I’ve stopped the Tamoxifen as it’s making me sick I think. I’ll know in about 3 days and I’m going to see GP then too.

Hope you’re all having a wonderful weekend.

Angie

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Hi angie, sorry tamox making you ill, hope you pick up after coming off it, what would you do after that, not take anything or ask for something else?

Hope wedding plans moving on xx

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Hi,
well I seem to be really busy but not sure what I was actually doing as I haven’t got much done so far this weekend. Lots of birthdays this month, including little chap, who will be 4 soon. He is so excited and his present requests change daily, causing major problems as we all want to spoil him. I bought a wooden Brio type train set and tracks, which was not on his list but I think he will enjoy. Also had to buy a large cuddly Scooby Doo and clothes, books, DVDs, etc. Totally over the top as always, just can’t help myself when I see something I know he will enjoy. We have been playing games all evening and colouring pictures so I am worn out. YD has been at Crufts today and I am concerned about her arrival tomorrow as she usually brings something disgusting like a baked pig’s nose or ear for our dog to eat. They smell horrible so the dog is suitably impressed and treats her like a long lost owner when she comes round.The family all seem to be getting excited about the house I rented and in the holiday mood so it looks like a big party.2 mad people have already vowed to go in the pool no matter what. I am still freezing most of the time, despite being on tamoxifen!
Hi Angie, glad you did not find the bone scan too bad and hope it is positive news from it.I feel a bit anxious for you, coming off the tamoxifen. Can you see the onc about it or do you think the GP will know enough to help? It is a shame that it seems to be making you feel ill as it should hopefully be helping you too. I did read your other thread about it and know you think these things through before taking action so good luck in finding an alternative treatment. Any idea what you can take instead that would be as effective? Hope wedding plans are helping to take your mind off all the nausea and Bc stuff.Not long now Mrs Tommy!!!
Lisa sorry you feel low, it is probably the worry about the recon. Perhaps you will feel better once you have made a decision about what to have. Why not have a second opinion at a bigger unit as finding a doc you like and trust might help? Next stop blood pressure tablets argggh I hope you don’t need them. I ahte taking tablets myself. How are you getting on with the machine? When does the lovely new bed arrive? Is that one of your treats? Great idea. Are you cutting right back on salt to help your bp?
Lorraine sounds like your energy levels are low, my advice is more cake!! Any luck with a job yet? You could probably sign on and they might be able to help. All the lovely spring flowers are popping up everywhere and look so pretty, perhaps Angie is right and you need the sun. How is Victor now?
FB another of my BC pals is worried about her memory and I think that happens with a lot of people. It must be a mixed blessing when people don’t know you have had BC. You can avoid people going on about it but they maybe expect too much of you sometimes. Sorry to hear your hairdresser cut too much off. I am having mine done soon and will be stressing about the scissors, arggh. Hate having my hair cut now, I just want to keep it and grow it longer again. Can’t do that though as not very thick yet.
Julia hmm I had not thought about deep nerves and hope mine are not frazzled when I go for the big squeeze. How long will you have to wear the heart monitor for? Do you have to sleep with it on? Poor you.
Nicky, is this the busy weekend? If so have a great time.
Love
Lily x

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Hi all,

Angie sorry to hear the Tamoxifen is causing such grief. I had my prescription changed from one manufacturer to another which helped a bit but I am like Lily and seem to be freezing a lot of the time. My electric blanket at night really helps though. Hope the results of the bone scan are good and thinking of you and Tommy.

Regarding getting the correct Vit D (which we are probably all depleted in) the nutritionist I spoke to at the Haven said to try to get at least 30 mins daylight (sunlight ha ha what sunlight) on our skin every day but not to wear sun protection for that period of time (obviously being sensible and not going out in the mid day sun when abroad without protection) as the body cannot activate the manufacture of Vit D through suncreens hence the huge increase of BC in Australia etc. Which I thought was very interesting as I have always put suncreens on due to the fact I have such fair skin.

Lisa I have pasted in my favourite flower which is the Orchid I had quite a few and had always been really lucky with them, that is until I got BC and they all started to die must have picked up on bad vibes from me. Anyway I am nuturing some along at present and hope they will recover. They are such a beautiful plants and such good value for money as once they flower they do so for months.

Lily I had been doing o.k. at work but overheard two schoolgirls having a real hoot with one another regarding my cropped hair. Silly little girls but I still felt quite down by it. Infact I had a really weird thing happen to me just yesterday at my Pilates class as I was doing one exercise and the room was nice a dark with peaceful music playing I had such a sense of physical relief from my arm it made me cry I felt such a twit thankfully the lighting was too subdued for anyone else to realise but how strange I had absolutely no idea that was going to happen. So I guess we are all still very fragile at times.

love to all Nicky, Lorraine, Julia, FB …

Bev xx

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Hi all, Bevy flowers are lovely. dont worry about the crying thing I cry at drop of a hat!! Least no one seen.

Lily, glad you get to treat little one, I cant help but treat my niece, its addictive and in about 5 weeks time I’ll have anohter. Its emotional as I know I cant have any but it will be lovely too see my brother and wife so happy at number 2 and think she would like more, aarrrghgh, I cant afford it!!!

My bed is lovely and boy I dont want to get out of it. Blood pressure machine going well, up today but coming down with wine and dancing on ice!!! Bed is my first treat and next is to get rid of my horrid bathroom, its tiny and peach so its going and getting a shower room as its soo small and havent had a bath since bc as too much thinking time!

Ive been much more positive last few days, think BP thing keeps my mind occupied. Also, I havent read since before bc and used to love it. Friend bought me a book called p.s. I love you, it was about a young woman who was widowed about a year after married (hum, good start), and he left her letters forcing her to do things and again (hum, drunken night in dublin very similar), well, I read it in one night till 3.30am, I cried and cried and laughed and laughed, it was great and discovered its on tv in a week or so, not as good but a must watch.

Well Id better go, dancing on ice results on!!! Lily hope you watching it. Got 13 hours at work tomorrow but not starting till 10am as going to mams to try and get blasted sleeve on!!! xx

P.s. yippeee going to Dublin for my friends 30th in September - something to look forward too - not as early as easter mind!! xxx

Angie, hope wedding plans going well, will have to meet up, probably after wedding as you will be soooo busy right not xx

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hi everyone

lisaf
hope you sort bp out, im on tabs (not disciplined enough to sort it out through weight loss and excercise.) just another lot of tabs to take. but all the better if you do manage to control it.

lily 2000
still feeling tired, not back at work but on benefits for now. im glad to be able to relax if the truth be known, when i went back it did seem an effort. my back does get tender at times, so at least i can take care of it. you mentioning pigs ears reminded me. my neice as been given the eye on her way to work, by a fellow who works in a pet shop. so i persuaded her to go in with me, and i would buy a pigs ear and dried sausage for my sisters dog. she was just like a nervous teenager, i dont know if he clicked what we were up to. but he invited her back to look at his rockweiller.(something not to be missed) . on her advice, i have to leave it a week, and return to purchase something again, and ask a few personal questions as well. the things we do for love hey!

angie
hope docs sort out your meds, you need the reasurance at the moment. im ok on tamoxifen, except for hot flushes, and weight gain. (but then again it could just be my age, and cream cakes i eat.) really hope things improve. take care

goodnight everyone, hope you have a good start to your week tommorow,x

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Hi,
Lisa yup you sound quite chirpy with all that retail therapy. I envy you the lovely bed but I would probably just not get out in the morning and get the sack! Shower room sounds nice too, what colour suite will you have? I am into white or cream at the moment. We never got round to tiling ours as Bc came along so that is on the list to to do. I am so very sorry that you won’t have a child now but know you will be a very special person to the kiddies you come in contact with and who knows you could meet someone with kids in the future. You never know what is round the corner. Good thing to get back to reading and it might have helped you being so relevant.I can’t believe you are working 13 hours!Why? Take it easy for the rest of the week, won’t you.
Bev, I like orchids too and weird that they died. I have to have a cry quite regularly and then feel better for it. I had not realised you were freezing too. I take it the nolvadex has not completely taken the flushes then. I was hoping they would go altogether. Went out in the sun today so that as an intesting view. Kids do say horrible things unfortunately and it is hard sometimes not to bite back. Hope you have forgotten it now.
Hi to everyone else. Nicky have I frightened you off by saying I am ciming your way?LOL. Angie how are the plans going, what sort of food are you having? Lorraine how are things?
Hi to everyone else
Lily x

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Lily, did you watching dancing on ice then???

White suite I think, shopping, keeps me sane, sad or what!!!

Boy its cold here, classed as a tornado type about 15mins from me, can you believe it!!! Working tomorrow then got an evening meeting, unfoturnatley its an hour away and have to drive people there and then take minutes till 8.3o then drive back, the worst thing is tidying my car and I really dont do polite chit chat in car its painful!! My boss will do anything for me but I think he thinks Im totally back to normal and full capacity but have my appraisal next week so will have a chat, I think its me too that doesnt want to admit Im not back on full pilot!!!

Night all, off to watch come dine with me xx

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Well, havent changed my photo for a while, so here’s another. Its got some of my favourite people it. My dad, my two uncles, my chemo nurse and yes, thought I would at last introduce you to RATTY!!!

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Well, I’m not a happy bunny as Lily has beaten me to the last photo on here! I will try to do something about this later.
OH and I were away in Madrid over the weekend - fantastic and so sunny and warm. I’m on a quick catch up just to post that I am alive and kicking and I’ll read everyone’s posts later. I have another massage this afternoon - bliss. Then a blood test - hell. Treatment on Weds this week so I avoid YD’s and my birthdays. A frantic week this week with YD’s 18th on Thurs, meal in London for us 4 on Friday, drinks here on Sunday. Stress, what stress?
Love to all, and will read everything later - and get a photo on - I promise!
Nicky x

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Nicky enjoy, and get a nice sunny weekend picture to put on xx

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Hi
A late catch up from me, I’m normally on here in the morning.
The cows in the picture are from Madrid where they are hosting a Cow Parade. We thought it was just that city but they put them on all over the world and local artists paint them and they are later auctioned for charity. I will keep posting different ones so you can all see them and think you’re in Madrid as well, just get a glass (jug?) of Sangria and you will be!
We had a lovely time but it’s back to reality. YD’s B’day on Thurs so have been wrapping presents tonight with OH - I think I’m as bad as you Lily - I don’t seem to be able to stop. And you Lisa and Lorraine - what has got into us?
The tiredness you talk about is quite well known after chemo, especially for Lorraine as you have mets. It is called cancer fatigue and they run sessions about it with BCC people.
I’m tired but just doing too much, however I can report I’ve had my top up of Vit D!
My massage was great and ‘hunt the vein’ after was fairly quick but I think the vampire twisted the needle as it came out - sure felt like it anyway - so I expect a big bruise tomorrow.
Bev - I think we all feel down no matter where we are on this awful path. We’ve been through so much and I don’t think we all give ourselves enough time to recover. We all try to get back to normal but it does take a while - Lisa please note :wink:
Angie - hope results are good when they come through - don’t envy you the wait though. I’ll be doing the same in a few weeks, which will be a worry as these are the 1st results after finishing chemo 6 months ago (can you believe that it was so long ago?) and relying on hormones. I also need to check with my onc why I’m having a different breast check, my appt came through for a different dept (X ray not Mammo), so hope nothing odd is going on. All your wedding preparations sound so good, I’m sure the day will be fab, please let us have any links to the photos.
Lily - don’t worry I’ll be around - you’ll find me at Tesco - ha ha! Just let me know when and where and I’m sure we can sort out another meet up that doesn’t involve the great doughnut around London. Hope plans for your D’s wedding are coming on and all the other celebrations for your grandson. Nice to see Max in the photo, what a lovely dog he is.
I hope I’ve covered everything, if not I’m so sorry but the brain’s not up to 2 pages of missed posts!
Take care all and, as I’m not jetting off anywhere this week, I should be able to keep in touch. Hope you are all happy and enjoying the moment.
Nicky xx

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hi everyone

lisaf
how strange a lot of us are focusing on getting our houses in order. ive just finished my hall and i too have picked light colours need a bit of light in my life, had enough drearyness. ive been searching all over the place for some decorative sand, the kind you put in vases and cant find any anywhere, i have some cacti i want to put in a glass vase, the arrangements made up were 20 pound so i thought i would make one up, but wish id just brought one now.

lily 2000

im ok thanks, still a little weary at times, but just taking it in my stride at moment. oh and me have spent another day together, without a single argument, this is getting to be a habit, i dont want to give up. diet gone to pot again, steak pie and chips and apple pie for lunch. arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. but it was lovely.

angie

my thoughts are with you, wishing you health and happiness.

nicky 08
looked like an interesting weekend you had in madrid. are you planning your next trip now? cant keep a good girl down! cant wait for summer it was so cold today. did you buy anything nice in madrid, not a cow i hope?

good night god bless everyonex

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Hi,
I have been trying to work out a costume for red nose day on Friday. My house (school) have to come as a movie character. So I thought I would wear my wig called Audrey, that has never been on my head for more than 20 minutes. Can you believe I liked it, after all that trouble to avoid wearing it! When I took it off though my hair looked really pathetic and thin! So I have the edgey bob, dark sunglasses and a scarf, somewhere between Audrey Hepburn and Natalie Wood, but much wider you understand! Not sure what to wear though. I am not sure the kids will know who i am. I had such a laugh as a man arrived to look at the tiles and i was talking to him in the wig, scarf and glasses. His face was an absolute picture until I told him. Lisa I wish I could see a bigger picture to get a look at ratty, seems like an old friend after all this time! Speaking of rats, Nicky whats all the ‘as I’m not jetting off anywhere this week’ business??? LOL that tv appearance just went straight to your head didn’t it?? Can you fit me in? LOL. I will contact you about the dates and make a date. I won’t be bringing all 11 with me! The house is in Alton near Farnham, is that far? Hope you don’t get a painful bruise and that the next treatment goes smoothly. Have fun at YD’s birthday and forget everything else till all the fun is over. Strange to go to the x ray dept, perhaps it is a mistake? Hormones are very effective although I understand why you would still be anxious after they failed you before. You didn’t have the good old poison in your veins then though and that should make a big difference. Will still keep my fingers and toes crossed for you though. It will be fab to meet up and finish our non-stop 4 hour conversation lol. Thought the cows were fab and yes you were the last to put a photo on!! Lorraine, so glad you are getting the benefit you deserve and glad to hear that it is moving in the right direction with Victor too. Your lunch sounded fab after my corned beef roll and a yoghurt! Yes I am back on decorating, you can blame Lisa for starting me off again. We also went to look at new cars for hubby,as we have been told we are heading for a very big bill in the future. All the ones he liked were diesel and they make me feel sick so waiting for a petrol one we like to come in. Funnily enough the salesman admitted that diesels make you more travel sick and I am very prone to it so not chancing changing to a diesel after that.Hubby has never believed me when I say I feel sick even following a diesel and change lanes. He has no sense of smell and travels like a seagull! Lorraine you need Julia to send you sand, she is on the coast! Try ebay or the internet.
Lisa yes I watched and marvelled at Ray’s jump. Felt really old when my girls asked me who Robin Cousins was! I think shopping is good, looking forward and enjoying yourself. You deserve it and you paid for it anyway so it was a good thing to take out. You have started me off as well as we had a walk in shower put in and then I got this and we never retiled or painted it, so very scruffy. Not for long though. We are having the same tiles on the floor and walls, big swirly brown Terretzo (that looks wrong)ones that look like stone if I can afford and find the. Got a picture in my head of how it should look. How about yours? There are some great tiles around at the mo. Angie only 3 weeks to go, do we have a date for the cyber hen party and can we come in fancy dress or do you have a theme? I have to arrange the stripagram,lol!
Big hugs everyone
Lily x x x

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Hiya all, dont we sound cheery!!! Well just back from 13 hours at work with the american tan sleeve, yuk!!! Cant wind down now though!

Nicky last one for photo but its a good one!!! Oh and Sangria. Trying the diet again today and no weektime drinking, roll on friday I say!

So let the decorating madness commence then girls!! Lily do you mean travestine or summit like that?? its like a nice stone type that goes on walls and floors. My bathroom is tiny and if you recall during my chemo haze my colour scheme didnt go au natural but smack you in the face look which kept me busy!!! Working through the house so during chemo done my bedroom and bathroom. Hey idea, we could put pictures up of completed rooms or ones during and after!!! However, this time going to try and stick to brown and cream rather than colourful.

But for now just for lily, cant blieve Im going to show this, but will put up a ratty shot, only if we get one in your fancy dress.

Nicky, ouch, I have lots of bruises courtesty of needle attempts. maybe our viens will pick up one of these days.

Well better go and try and get some sleep. xx

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Hey, Lisa Ratty did you proud! But I know what you mean - I hated Wiggy but everyone said how good it looked - not in my book! I love not wearing a wig and it definitely affected the way I was with everyone, very quit (unlike me!) and hiding as I didn’t want people to stare or look at me too much. However I’m now back to being ‘me’ again - did you find that? I got some lovely photos at the weekend of me as I am now and I have to admit I look a lot better than when I had my old hair style before chemo. I may post one of me (in the distance) so you get a quick glimpse of me - I don’t want it on permanently in case I get googled!
Lily - Oh No you’ll just be down the road! Alton is about 10 miles away so we can definitely meet up, we can sort out nearer the time and I’ll see which other places are worth a visit for you. Brain’s gone but is it all the family for both weeks? If so I’ll try and get an itinerary ready for you :wink: And stop being so damn cheeky about my jetting off!
No more holidays planned for now although OH and I may take a few short breaks in the UK, like last year but without the wig and chemo looming (I hope!)
Lorraine - glad you’re getting on with OH better, it was obviously causing some stress before, hope it lasts. Keep enjoying the food and letting us know what delights you’ve had, I lead a very boring life food wise, I’ll just have to tell you what I’ve drunk instead LOL. We are going to London on Friday for YD’s b’day meal so I’ll let you know then as that will be far more exciting than the salad I had last night. This wasn’t from being ‘good’ but due to a total carb overload in Madrid!
Not sure if we’ll all be wearing red noses for our grand night out though!
Must dash, off to work today - luckily only 7 hours, not your marathon, Lisa.
Take care all, have a nice day
Nicky x

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Hi,
Lisa that is a great picture and I think ratty looks fab actually! Thanks for sharing it, you look soooo young! I feel about 90 some days when I get up as the tamoxifen is making me a bit stiff but only the first 10 feet or so. Decorating madness eh, sounds good to me as long as I am not doing it myself! I am having brownish tiles too, the same on the floor as the walls if the shop has what I have in mind. I have probably not spelt it right but it is terratzo tiles, checked with the boss. Have they decided what to do about having another try to do an MRI? Your poor old arm. I went out with lots of Bc ladies tonight and everyone seems to have arm trouble, so maybe it was a good call to have the port put in.
Nicky I would be most grateful if you could spare a morsel of time to meet up.LOL. Just kidding I am so excited to get over to see you. It is not the whole school break though. Probably make it later in the week when some of the family leave and send the rest on a trip I don’t want to do or too energetic or no cakes! There is a lot to see in that area so all ideas very welcome. Will email you the details and you can let me know when would suit you. Have a really fab day on Thursday, Friday and as long as the celebrations last. Which day is your birthday? Oh no I just read you lead a very boring food life!!! Yikes I am bringing you a cake to save you from yourself! Lorraine we really need to educate her to the many pleasures that we call cakes. She is missing out on too much, don’t you think? Have you thought of rescuing an older dog that is already trained? It would be nice and you could go out and about together or sleep in! I have always lived with a dog in the house and it just feels a bit empty without someone running up when you come in.
Hi everyone else. Drop in from time to time to keep us up to date in how you are and what you are up to. When is hen party Angie?
Hugs
Lily x

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Hi All

Lily, long time since anyone said I look young, feel like ive aged so much over last 12 months and accordingy to bone scan I am old before my time, aches and pains are a nuisance arent they as long as they dont stop the arm lifting cakes and other thngs to mouth! Tiles sound fab!!!

Hope you two have a lovely time together again, sounds like everyone got busy things coming up, Nicky hope you arent too frantic.

Dogs, wow, never had a pet until Robson and dont know what I would do without him, he is trouble with big T but its company.

Well everyon enjoy night and rest of week, Ive enjoyed tonight, spent all night doing paperwork which I hate and catching up as Im move an dhave a little office upstairs so lots of sorting, nice to know where I am for a change instead of running miles behind trying to keep up.

Angie, hope you are enjoying wedding arragements x

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Hi all
A very busy couple of days dealing with family as well as everything else I’m coping with. Brothers eh? Had my treatment today and only had to wait an hour grrrr! Vein was found on 2nd attempt so really not very happy being used as a pin cushion still. I managed to see my onc who checked the breast imaging appt and it turns out the radiologist runs a clinic in a separate part of the hospital as well so, phew, nothing different at all.
YD’s big day is tomorrow so all getting excited now. Plus my stresses should ease as I tick more 'to-do’s off the list. My big day is next week so we’re rolling one into the other! Having said that I’ve been so busy with hers I’ve not done or asked for anything for mine. Let’s hope it’s one big surprise. However let’s hope not as nasty as I got this day last year when my biopsy came back positive and it went down hill from there.
Hope everyone is getting on, keeping busy and enjoying themselves.
Lily - a cake sounds great! Don’t worry I am susceptible to some but savouries are more my thing. Once I’ve got this week or so out of the way we can sort our next meet up. I’ll also give you some ideas of what’s worth visiting. I’m here pretty much all of the time but I will be working. If I know which day is good for you I can sort my work around that.
Take care everyone
Sp soon
Nicky x