Hi you night owls, it’s the early bird here.
I know I don’t need to apologise for the stressy bits but every now and then IT just gets to me. I still feel like I’m chasing my tail but had a lovely chill out day yesterday so a bit calmer atm! That will all change on Monday when I’ve now got my onc’s appt instead of Thurs as the girl on the chemo ward reception thought she’d save me 2 visits in a week. Not sure if I want it then but at least it’s over and done with - so double fingers and toes crossed for me and Lily on Monday please!
Had a lovely day yesterday - if you ignore the blood test 1st thing! The hospital pathology bit is getting so busy I think I’ll go to my GP’s in future. I avoided them during chemo as my veins were so bad but they do seem to be able to find one for blood quite ‘easily’ now and at least I won’t have to wait for over half an hour. After the dreaded B test and a quick trip to Tesco to sort out the weekend I went to London (NOT ‘to buy heat magazine’ - you’ll either get that advert or not!) and saw a friend for lunch and a bit of retail therapy. The RT didn’t happen - again - but the lunch was great. She works in Kensington so after a leisurely lunch we walked through some lovely roads up to Knightsbridge. The houses there are gorgeous and would be worth millions. Went into Harrods, just browsing, and some other shops and ended up in Harvey Nicks. Again, did some browsing and then sat up on the terrace outside the 5th floor restaurant and had a glass of champagne. Ladies wot lunch - we certainly were! The weather was lovely so a real treat to have a good chin wag and general catch up. We have so many mutual friends that we didn’t run out of anything to say and had to run to get our respective trains to go home. Lily - we gave ‘our’ day a good run for it’s money
I can now look forward to a lazy weekend, out tonight to a friends house for a meal and hopefully a lazy day tomorrow without a mega hangover. At long last we now don’t have any great plans or things to organise, unless OH and I want to, so the weekends become ours again. It’s been so hectic since January that we’ve been busy all the time. Hope the good weather continues so we can - all- enjoy it.
Have a good weekend everyone, hope you get some sleep Lisa. We’ve just got into The Wire - language is foul but just about getting the hang of the characters and plot. Not into much else atm except YD has started watching The Great British Menu so we’ll follow that for a few weeks.
Hope you can chill out Lily as well. 1st big break from school since chemo last year - you deserve it. I’ve decided at the next college/school hols to take more time off, this is what’s stressing me out a bit as I’m not giving myself enough time out and have hardly had any time off since last year for me to do nothing - my days off usually coincide with appts etc, especially the last week or so. Relaaaaax.
Have fun everyone
Nicky x
Everything crossed for Lily and Nicky on Monday, here’s to any results coming fast as well, the wait seems endless.
Got my scan again in Newcastle, its a Breast MRI as it finds much smaller things and things earlier than a mamo - think they offer it to all BRCA1 people - I think anyone who has/had BC should get it. Arranged for me to see annethetist first so hopefully more luck than last time xx
Enjoy rest of your weekend all xx
Hi,
Lisa I am getting warmer every week so starting to think that it was just my very low body temperature keeping me safe from the dreaded flushes. None so far since November but not sure how I will be in Turkey this summer when it is really hot. Sorry to hear it is keeping you awake. I keep getting what I think is prickly heat on my arms and legs and really annoying. Thanks for your good wishes for Monday. Still you are making me feel quite calm compared to you lol. You know I really believe we cannot change what is or isn’t going to happen to us, but we could waste a lot of really fab times worrying about it. Plan to go to great places, expect to go to great places and fingers crossed you will do all of these things and the next list of things too. Missing out on all those dreams because of a what if, would be such a waste. I am looking forward to hearing about all your trips x x Glad the new hair cut is such a success. ps does one of your trips go down to London, wink wink!
Nicky, hey isn’t it great how a new day and some good times make the world look a cheerier place.Ok what time is your appointment? Mine is 11.50 so along morning waiting for it! I am feeling good about this, for both of us, so please get back on and post asap. I didn’t get the magazine comment, sorry. Sounds like a fab day in London, you posh bird!!!LOL. I hope you aren’t going to turn out to be married to a millionaire or someone famous!! Going out to dinner with one tv star will be awesome enough.LOL. Hope you had a nice evening tonight. We had friends over but they had to go early as he has MS and tires quickly. It is such a shame. He is a real joker and spent the whole evening asking me if we could have it off in the garage. It would have been much more flattering if we actually had a garage (made into another room) and if he had remembered his glasses as lost all peripheral sight. Not sure which of us was least able to oblige,LOL. Sorry lowered the whole tone there. I would love to chill next week but hubby has said a relative of his can stay all week, but hubby is going to work!! Not amused but I am sure it will be fine as he has lots to do while down here. I will just carry on doing my own thing although one toilet is out of bounds with the tiler so that could be tricky. Nicky it sounds like all your special dates went to plan so yes time to think of yourself again. Make sure it actually happens by booking the dates in your diary now. If you don’t post before Monday, sending all the 4 leaf clovers to you, apart from one for me. Everything crossed x x.
Hi everyone else, hope all is well and that you are enjoying the warmer weather. Angie how are you mate?
Hugs
Lily x
Hi Girls,
Good luck Lily for monday, do you get the results instantly or do you have to wait for them? always forget to ask that. Mine isn’t until May aghhhhh. Dreading it as the lump is so hard now with all the scar tissue that I assume it will be even more uncomfortable.
Lisa sounds as if the MRI scan is superior to the squashing of the mammogram hope it all goes well when do you have it? How amazing you had a hair cut I just cant wait for my hair to be long enough to need one! I still dont need to brush it just running my fingers through it is quite sufficient.
Nicky good luck with your appointment with the Onc, sounded as if you had a lovely day in London and here’s to many more of them!
Lorraine hope the teeth are feeling easier! after all we have been through you wouldn’t think a trip to the dentist would freak us out so much but I really dont like it now. Enjoy organising your party that is a really nice idea.
Angie thinking of you and hoping you are o.k.
My temperature control has gone completely out of control!. I spend so much time being cold that I now keep getting back ache where I am so tensed up I find the hot flushes much easier to deal with than the ghastly chills that I experience as it is nice to feel warm. Thank goodness for electric blankets I can see me still using it in the middle of summer as this rate.
I should find out next week what is happening re my job but it looks as if my hours will be severally cut which is not what I want as whilst I am at work I have a structure to my week and not too much time to think about things.
Still it is supposed to be a good day tomorrow and I am going for a nice 5 mile walk with friends which will be lovely.
Our daughter came home from France on Thursday only for a couple of days training for a summer job but the lucky thing travelled on the Orient Express which looks absolutely amazing and it was great to see her as the last time we were together was last July and I was horribly poorly then so it was good for her to see mum a bit more upbeat.
Thinking of you all and have a good week Bev x
hi all, sweating like mad but prob due to wine and take away pizza, lol, must get to the diet on Monday, but although headaches back been feeling much more upbeat and hopefully it will continue without anything bad happeneing, just try not to think about it all now, sometimes when I hear someone has to have chemo, Im like Oh the poor thing, must be sooo hard, then I think bloody hell Ive done it, how on earth did it - but we all did and should be proud the way we all dealt with it.
Bevy, love the look, you look really happy and healthy, hey I might have a hair cut but it still aint much longer than yours, my parents are dreading the day when I can colour it again! Breast MRI would be easier if they could find my viens but already had mamo and wasnt as bad as I thought pain wise but I still panic that they see something etc. paranoia settng in.
Lorraine glad you went to dentist, I needed nothing but a scrape, albeit teeth are slack but I hate mine, spent years getting them straight with braces and now a huge gap again so arrnaging an appointment to see about something called invisilign, like retainers that straighten your teeth overtime but might be too costly.
Lily, hee hee wink wink, no trips to London planned but i sure he will be home easter weekend and sure he wont be in touch but his sisters are some of my best friends so i will know if home!!!
Will pop on tomorrow night to wish even more luck to Nicky and Lily for Monday.
Hey do we think Angie has managed some kind of honeymoon!!!
bevvy, at least your hair suits you short, and it will soon grow. i know what you mean about temperature control. most times im having hot sweats but theyre very often followed by me piling blankets and everything on to get warm, and then 5 minutes they all have to come off again. uncomfortable at times. im wandering what summer will be like. seeing as i cant bare too much because of lymphodema under arm, and scar high on chest, its so awkward shopping for clothes at the moment. still at least im here to do that, and i tell myself to be thankful. at least i can hide my scars and wounds, not like the soldiers i seen in the paper last week, who had no arms or legs, theyre are always others worse than ourselves, just forget somedays.
lily and nicky
hope results are good this week, be thinking of you, at least when you meet up you can chat about things.
lisaf
teeth have settled down, i was shocked it only cost £43 for 4 fillings and scale polish, and check up i thought that was reasonable.
hope you manage to sort yours out.
have a good week everyonex
Hi,
well I had made a resolution not to wish time away but that was before my visitor arrived. He could knock you out with BO. Poor chap is diabetic and over 22 stone (hope the bed is up to it) and kidneys going caput as refused to eat as diabetics should and does no exercise. He swelled up so badly he could not even sit and landed in hospital for 3 weeks. That was about 6 weeks ago and he has not been able to and is still not able to bath or shower because of his ulcerated legs. I am trying my best but ohh woof woof, not good with nasty niffs. This may be a very long week! Bear with me if I go potty this week!
Lorraine I have been wondering what to wear in the sun too as can’t get any sun on the rads area this year, they say. Maybe fine cotton loose tops? depends what is in the shops this year I guess. Good price for your nashers, thankfully. Lisa keep us posted about the drunken bits and pieces! Dare I tell you I have coloured my hair 3 times now and the last time had several colours put in to warm it up. I dyed mine while on chemo but used organic dye. Go for it.
Bev, nice to hear from you and a lovely pic too. I had not really thought but gosh I guess they will tell me tomorrow. Yikes! Will report back more tomorrow anyway. My scar tisuue had softened but gradually got harder again since rads. It is lower than the original site as they tunnelled to avoid a scar at the top. Someone else on here was talking about the bubble thing and I thought ooh I know the famous first for that one. So sorry about your job and don’t forget you may have extra rights as now covered by the Disability act. Might be worth your while to just ask how the Disability act affects what they are doing so they have to check up on it. I know exactly what you mean about those horrible shivers. They used to race up and down my body if I just move a tiny bit. I found a cellular blanket really good. Mine has more or less gone over the last month so waiting to see if I get flushes next! Fab to see your daughter and now you will be well enough to maybe go there too.
Well fingers and toes tied in knots and big hugs for tomorrow Nicky. We walk into no mans land together tomorrow, see you on the other side, hopefully the one with the greenest grass.
Love
Lily x x
Gud look girls for tomorrow, Lily I waited about 10 days for my results and thought I was okay until docs told me results were in when I was there about soemthing else - eeek!!
Visitor doesnt sound nice, I have such a week stomach I bauk at even squirty cream.
Had a lovely day today but does anyone get tired really easy, I panic that summit wrong as soooo tired. Niece and mam and dad went out today, went for lunch, took my niece bowling, swings, shop, then wanted to make easter cards - love buying her stuff to make, its my idea of fun and hers so soo nice, when cant have kids can be there for her!
Well watched secret millionaire again tonigh, worn out now, cry like a baby, lol.
Everything crossed that tomorrow is a good day xxxxx
Hi ladies
Thanks for all the good luck and fingers crossed and double crossed bits! Trying not to think about it and picture a positive outcome but the mind does play tricks doesn’t it? Fingers crossed for Lily - although with mammos you may not know straight away will you? I’m not even sure my CT scan results will be in today so I could be building myself up for nothing. Still have the pamidronate though so will be in hospital for a while anyway.
Love the photo Bev - looking really good. Hope you enjoyed the time with your daughter and it must be so nice for her to see you now after all the chemo etc which laid you (and all of us!) low. As Lily says check out if there’s andy help you can get with the cut in hours through the disability act.
Lily - poor you, I would go ballistic if I had to have someone stay for that long who I didn’t know - I think OH knows not to ask, ever! Try to keep busy all day and not be around the house if you don’t want to be. Will be in touch later this week to sort out where/when we meet - hopefully still on for next Thurs eve?
Lisa - hope you had a good weekend - you certainly sound busy and it’s no wonder you get tired - I think we all still do and carry on as if our bodies weren’t attacked by poison for 4 or more months!
Angie - hope you are OK now you are living the married life and hope you are getting on with all the good things.
Lorraine - good to hear from you as well, will hopefully have more time soon to read and re-read any posts I’ve missed. I daren’t go to the dentist atm as I really don’t like my new one plus I have to be careful with the IV bisphos which can cause problems if you need any ‘real’ work done. Must get a check up soon though.
Take care all, esp anyone I’ve not mentioned - sorry - brain not in gear yet.
Nicky xx
Happy Easter to you all.
Many thanks for the compliment re my cropped look but I think the bunny is preferable.
Hope all goes really well for Nicky and Lily today thinking of you both and sending positive vibes your way.
It is so reassuring to know that you are all suffering the weird temperature control problem (sorry I know that is not nice for you but makes me realise I am not the only one)
Lily how could you cope with having someone to stay who obviously has so many problems you are a saint. Good luck
Lisa I know it is really frustrating getting tired but as Nicky said we all forget the assault our bodies have been under. When I go on a ramble with others I am always at the back now and really struggle something that never use to happen to me and likewise when gardening, which I love doing, I can now only do half a hour before the back starts aching and the arm really starts to play up and continues feeling uncomfortable into the next day. I find the only thing that really gives relief to get it feeling near normal again is swimming which I would strongly recommend trying.
Girls regarding the sun problem as you may remember I went to Tenerife in January and it was very hot so I just made sure I put suncream on and always had a light weight long scarf with me that I could drape (very sexy) over either my arm or chest if I was anywhere I felt vunerable and I always sat under umbrellas. So long as you are careful the sun should be o.k. the other thing I needed and I think I will continue to wear this summer was a sun hat which made me feel more protected too. After all we have had a lousy Winter and really want to enjoy the sun when it is here.
Angie thinking of you.
Have a good week everyone.
Bev x
Hi
Back from the hospital and great news - my mets are not doing anything right now! This may seem weird to some of you (that I’m so pleased) but it means the hormones are doing the same job as chemo and my bone mets are still showing signs of repair. You can imagine my relief! nearly kissed the onc but she may not have liked it unlike Katie Perry. Next scans in 6 months so a few months to forget about them (as if that’s possible!) . Anyway just wanted to let you all know. Also treatment went pretty much to plan and miraculously a vein was found and used straight away - didn’t even feel it! Mentioned my aches and pains but that seems to be Arimidex as the most likely cause, especially as I know they’re not new mets now!
Hope the boob squashing was not too uncomfortable today Lily.
Btw the talk about flushes etc from you all. I was going to ask how you were Lisa as we’re in the same state right now, and I think you’re on Arimidex as well? When I had a temporary menopause the 1st time round my flushes were awful. Touch wood they seem much better this time but I think Ari doesn’t bring them on as much as Tam. I do feel warmer though, especially in the evenings and at night - but nothing like I did before. This could be an age thing as I’m nearer my natural menopause this time around or just down to different hormone tablets but as my ovaries have been stopped for the last 6 months I’m surprised this has not been worse - not complaining though.
Take care all
from a much less stressed Nicky xx
hi everyone
lily 2000
how kind of you, it cant be easy, but sometimes people just cant help the way they are for some reason we cant understand, and accepting this man with all his faults is very kind. to not look after yourself you must be in a very low state. and someone being kind at that moment is something he will always remember.
dont know what to suggest about the smell, like nicky says just make your self scarse a lot more than normal.
nicky 08
its good that youve had good results, i felt just like you when i was told there was no new spread, but somehow you sometimes wonder if the bone scans show up other areas as well as the bones, i think we will perhaps always worry a little.
you didnt tell me how your palpatations are, ive been having a lot lately.
lisaf
i too sometimes worry to when im tired, and also get frustrated by not being able to do so much. but then just tell myself to stop, and think how lucky i am, at least im alive. hard not to worry sometimes though.
take care everyone.x
Hi,
well it was not such a hot, sweat inducing day, relief and my visitor was very amenable and went out straight after breakfast, not returning until 5 pm. He eats everything I give him although he has not thanked me once or even taken his cup or plate to the kitchen. No offers of help with anything but he did buy himself some cornflakes as I said i don’t have any yesterday. He does not really talk at all, mostly monosyllable answers. I asked him if he saw his brother (who lives very close) often and he said we speak on the phone once a week and I sometimes see him when I am in the market. So I do feel really sorry for him and deserve no praise Lorraine as I have been moaning! Hubby and him are in the other room in total silence. Hubby even offers to do every lift for our son so think it is getting to him now. Ha ha!
Oh by the way had 4 mammos, yowee, yowee, yowee and the last one was yoweeeeeee. It is because I am so short and the corner of the machine is always sticking hard into my armpit or collarbone. No results, I was reminded I was NHS now and not private as before when you can be told your results there and then. Doc who has to see all results has just gone on his hols for 2 weeks so they will write to me and expect it to take up to 4 weeks. I was just really glad I was not there having my first appointment or desperately waiting to hear results of a scare. So no news although I see the onc at the end of the month and he apparently is likely to have my results then. Nicky fabo fabo news. That is soooooooooooooo wonderful and good old hormones and good old hot flushes that have looked after you so nicely, never moan about them again!!!I bet the world is looking very different today after that. Hope you have a good celebration and it will make it much easier for the girls to follow their dreams now, without constantly wondering. Hooooooray. Will give you a big hug next week to say well done. Lisa thanks too, my results will have to keep but just putting them out of my mind as no actual reason to have doubts at the mo. Need to keep a grip!! Bev thanks for the tip with the scarf, i have quite a few from in case i lost my hair days. I have signed for the race for life too and plan to walk it with some Bc local friends, most likely in a record slowest time. Well I have booked a lot of lunches out, dinners out and other things to nrighten the week. Most out of character I have signed up for 3 work outs with a personal trainer this week. Not sure if it was the bargain price of £10 or the fact that he is a slightly older, not gay and taller image of Craig off Hollyoaks. There were lots of plump, happy , sweaty middle age ladies bouncing around him and I thought I will fit just right in there. So first one tomorrow. Arggggh. Had to go out and buy suitable trousers that fitted this afternoon.
No doubt will be an aching wreck tomorrow
Nicky soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo pleased x
Lily x x x x
yipppeeee Nicky congrats that’s great news, if you know what I mean.
Lily, personal trainer eh, get you.
Well signing off early tonight as exhausted and think Im getting tonsillitus again or something - sore throat, headache, feel like hit by a brick so working from home tomorrow to get some peace as when i feel crap get bit panicying and worried so better off concentrating at home (he he little lie in)
Good news girls and here’s to a lovely easter break for us all xx
Hi
Yes - get you - Lily - who do you think you are? Madonna? Good luck and especially tomorrow when you will feel all those muscles screaming at you! Hope your visitor doesn’t put too much of a strain on you but he’s a bit inconsiderate if he can’t even clear up his things. Bet you’re wishing the week away which isn’t good as it’s your break. Will get in touch later in the week re meet up for the where and when’s.
Lisa - look after yourself, could be just general rundown-ness that’s doing it as you have been working hard recently. Maybe take a few vitamins and curl up in bed if it doesn’t get any better today.
Lorraine - I guess you do know what it’s like! A great relief but I will still worry about the aches! My scan was a CT so it does show the organs as well as bones. However because it concentrates on the main part of your body I do wonder about the other bits that aren’t included - will we ever stop? Probably not. My palpitations are under control now. They do come on when I’ve had a few too many vinos but I know I’ve caused that myself! In the last few weeks with various things going on socially they have happened a few times but I hope to stop that now. Worth getting them checked at the GPs, who can also prescribe the drugs and not just the cardiologists. I saw the cardio because my GP put me in hospital as a day case back in October when I was having them one day so I then had a followup. When ‘researching’ this there is a definite link to lowered hormone levels and after effects of chemo. I’m also on a potassium supplement as low potassium can cause them and my level is still quite low, even on them, as I check each time I have a blood test done.
Hope everything is good with everyone else. Off to work today - boo hoo but looking forward to the long weekend which I’m stretching out until the mid of next week.
Take care
Nicky, and thanks for all the congrats x
hi everyone
wey to go lily! soon i,ll be the only fatty left on here. bet youve given up the cream cakes too. it is a shame hubby invited the guest when your on your break, where does he know him from? and you still deserve praise, you are allowing him to stay, dont know if i could.
nicky 08
thanks for info on palpatations i shall go docs when i get chance, but like you said its probably hormones or effects from chemo, but i will check.
lisaf
hope you feel better soon, it seems we sometimes pick up one thing after another, but if youre like me, i dont rest a lot, want to fill every moment just incase.
angie
hope you ok, and having a good time with your tommy!
its my birthday today so i shall be out celebrating at lunch with a friend from church, my son whose 13 baked me a cake last night, it actually looks like its turned out better than mine.
would have had some for breakfast but cant cos of tabs. boring or what!
have a good day!
Hi, hope you have a lovely birthday and the sun has shone and that cake was yummy!!! xxx
Happy Birthday Lorraine - you kept that one quiet! 21 Again? Hope you had a good day, enjoyed the cakes once you got over the waiting time for the tablets and had a fab day overall.
Take care
Nicky xx
hi everyone
had a lovely day out, not spent much birthday money itching to be spent, but enjoy shopping alone, and i was with friends today.
lisaf
thanks for the birthday cake, you must be a wizz with the computer, how did you put name on it.
nicky
just had peice of sons cake. yum yum, hes a dab hand at baking, new discovery. so hell be doing the baking from now on.
everyone have a good evening.x
Happy Birthday Lorraine and what a lovely son you have making you a cake. Hope you had a lovely day.
Greaaaaat news Nicky!!! I am so pleased for you. Now relax and enjoy easter.
Lily well the horrible bit is over although how unfair having to wait for the results but well done and for signing up to have a personal trainer !! all sounds a bit frightening bet again well done.
Love to all Bev x