Hello all. New here and hoping to unload a little to people who will get it. I’ve just been diagnosed with a stage 1 invasive ductal carcinoma, 3 days ago. Now in this awful limbo of waiting for an MRI (a week today, then 1-2 weeks for results) to see if there’s any more surprises.
They’ve told me because it’s small and caught early, and my armpits looked clear on the ultrasound, that it all looks as least-worse as it could be. And that I’ll probably only need a lumpectomy and then hormone therapy, although that may change depending on the MRI results.
However I’m struggling to believe this good prognosis because after my initial scans & biopsy the consultant said “we think it’s benign” and “I wouldn’t waste any time worrying about the test results”. I have no risk factors and they seemed very sure it was nothing serious.
But it’s turned out to be cancer.
So now I feel like anything is possible and I can’t put much faith in their saying it looks low grade.
I’m usually a positive and pragmatic person but I’m really struggling to navigate all this.
I’m 45, a single mum to 2 wonderful children, and am finally living a really happy, fulfilling life after some really tough times including separating from my long-term partner last year. I have a wonderful support network of family and friends who are already rallying for me.
I just don’t quite know how to stop myself fearing the worst while waiting for the MRI results and treatment plan.
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Hi, I’m sorry you are facing this situation. It’s scary and you most likely feel angry and out of sorts. It sounds like you’ve got yourself and your family into a good place recently and now you face this… you will go through all the emotions, let it happen. However be kind to yourself. The MRI will give clarity, I had one and it’s not so bad, mainly noisy. The results were quite quick and it meant the consultant could accurately know the size and place of the cancer for surgery. Once you have the results you’ll move forward with a plan and it helps the feeling of being in control. Everyone’s journey is different, but it sounds early stage and that is a positive. Big hugs and ask any questions on this group where you will find great support xx
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Hi @beachfox
Sorry you have to be here, but welcome!
I feel for you so much as remember feeling very similar last year. I was 46 and had also been through a really tough time, sorted my life out and was happy and I thought healthy for the first time in ages, and then bam! The shock of a diagnosis takes some time to process and it’s difficult not to fear the worst when you’re in this awful limbo. But, I guarantee you will feel better once all the tests are done and you know what treatment is happening and when.
These are simple suggestions, but for me they helped massively while I was waiting for MRIs and other stuff to be decided. Writing in a journal - offloading, venting, crying, swearing - didn’t matter what I wrote other than getting it all out. Secondly is exercise. I cannot recommend that enough and will help not only take your mind off things now, but I am convinced is the reason I have had such a good recovery and no ongoing issues.
You’ll be well looked after and people are here to support you. If you have any questions just shout. x
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Thank you @amafoss65 and @southwest123 for your kind words and reassurance. I can see things will feel easier once I know what the plan is. It’s the uncertainty that’s so hard.
Journaling and exercising are both a good call. I do both already but not always consistently! So will make an effort to.
Its only been a couple of days but I’m already finding the cognitive dissonance a bit draining, when talking to people about summer plans and what I’ve been up to, without mentioning the cancer diagnosis and pending treatment. It’s like living in 2 parallel worlds.
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Hi @beachfox
Your messages resonated with me not only because I’ve trod the same path but also the feeling of living two parallel lives
If I was you I would just say what’s going on. You’ve got enough on your plate without trying to keep a lid on all the fears and emotions you are living through.
I know everyone is different but I tended to tell it as it was. Sometimes we don’t like opening up as we are trying to protect our family and friends. I started off like that but in the end I couldn’t keep it up. I wanted reassurance and to speak to family.
As @amafoss65 and @southwest123 have said be kind to yourself. The exercise and journaling are great but I was a bit intermittent with it all. I used a digital journal on my phone where you can add pictures when you’re out and about to remind you of one good thing you’ve done that day and that there is a blue sky up there behind all the clouds.
If you need counselling then please ask. I spoke to my bcn and I was lucky enough to be added to a trial where I had a series of zoom one to one sessions. The breast cancer now also can put you in touch with volunteers from ‘someone like me’ who have been through the same and just tell you that it’s ok to feel low, cry, scream whatever.
This forum is amazing and we are all rooting for you
Please keep us updated
And take care
Best wishes
Lynn x
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Thank you Lynn, I like the idea of making a daily photo record too to help notice and remember all the little good things. Speaking to a counsellor is a good call too, I’ll keep that in mind that I may be able to access this through the BC nurse.
I’ve started telling family and friends and it does feel better when they know.
Thank you for your reassurance x
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Hi Beachfox!
As was said above, your story resonates with all of us. I completely agree about the not knowing- it’s like torture.
It sounds like you will be on a similar path to me, although mine was a tad more advanced (stage 2 invasive ductal carcinoma) albeit still classed as primary.
Most of us ladies end up having surgery, then a wait for pathology (to make sure they know exactly what excites your particular cancer cells 
Then once they know (& that’s where I am now- post lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy) they can plan your next steps.
Stage 1 is early, which means there is less chance that they will find cancer cells in your lymph nodes, but they will check everything anyway. It sounds like that’s why you are having an MRI. I’ve had one too. I’m claustrophobic but, I just kept my eyes shut and looked at it as an enforced rest!
So, you’ll have your lump removed in the coming weeks. Usually day surgery. May have 1/2 nodes removed as a precaution so they can look at them. Then a wait for a few weeks (whilst you recover from your lumpectomy.) You’ll need to take it easy for 2/3weeks, by which time your pathology will be sent through.
Once they have your pathology results, they will have a team meeting and plan what treatments are best for your particular type of critter.
My first biopsies came back ER+/PR+ but they are querying HER2 status, as that requires a particular type of meds to tackle it and may mean a short stint of chemo. (I’d rather not, but… if I have to, I have to.) it won’t be for long.
Most of us have radiotherapy (2 to 3 weeks - mon to Fri) and then you take your hormone therapy for 5 years. You’ll likely have a mammogram every year to monitor you.
So, yes, it’s scary as hell. No one wants to be told you’ve got cancer. And it hits you like a freight train! But- knowledge helps.
This forum is fantastic. It’s helped me so much because we all hit bumps in the road or feel like we are drowning. But there’s light at the end of this. You’ve caught yours early! Most early bc have a 90 + percent positive outcome.
It’s a process- we are all on the same track (one way or another) so, follow the track and get yourself out the other end.
You’ll get there.
Sending hugs!
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Hi @beachfox - I’m sorry you’re in this situation, I’m hoping for the best results for your MRI 
I know there’s a lot going on, but as you’re a single mum I just wanted to let you know there are a lot of charities offering support. If you have a MacMillan nurse, they can refer you to The Osborne Trust, who support children whose parent/s have cancer. My MacMillan nurse referred me and we got a soft play voucher and some soft toys. My kids are fairly small though but there’s support for older kids too.
The Someone Like Me service through Breast Cancer Now was also a huge help for me when I was going through treatment, just to speak to other mums who had gone through this and their experience, it felt like a weight off my shoulders for those days where you feel like you’re alone.
Maggies is another charity for everyone, invaluable to me throughout my treatment- I would just go and cry sometimes and I always left feeling ten times better.
If you need any help or advice with anything, this is a safe forum with so many lovely ladies! Even if you just need to vent, we’re all here for you 
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Hi beachfox
You are more than welcome
Here’s a link to someone like me
You can call or email depending on how you feel
As I say your breast care nurse will be able to help with some counselling
And further along your journey after your treatment you may feel like joining an online support group. I did this and then I started a WhatsApp group and whilst there’s only 3 of us who continued we have supported each other through some tough times. We are there for not only following our personal cancer journeys, but also day to day life. We celebrate the good things and support each other through the down days too. This has been a godsend
It can be a very lonely place and the waiting for appointments, biopsies and MRIs and then ongoing treatment can be difficult at times.
There’s so many wonderful people on this forum and I have been supported by many
If you need any further help and I am able to assist then please please message me. I will always answer and if I can’t help I will endeavour to point you in the right direction.
Take care
Lynn xx
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You’ve fallen slightly fowl of the limitations of mammograms and ultrasound. MRI is more detailed and better accuracy. However, the ultimate is pathology - you can believe in that usually. The pathway is sometimes not cast in stone and is a best estimate until surgery has been done and the tissue looked at and tested. You will most likely have a sentinel node biopsy as well as lumpectomy, which can change things as small cells can’t be seen on a scan.
I had surrounding DCIS that nobody had any idea of before surgery. Didn’t change the plan too much - needed more radiotherapy. Treat all tests prior to surgery as only going as far as showing what type of surgery is appropriate. Ongoing treatment is based on the pathology results. Until they are known, the treatment path is not entirely known. Hopefully, that way you can prepare yourself for any possible changes. They may give you the most likely scenario of a plan during biopsy results, but its a best guess at that point until more is known.
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Hiya, I was diagnosed with DCIS beginning of June. Since then I’ve convinced myself many times it’s going to be far worse, that they’ve not got it right and that it’s everywhere else.
This is normal. You’ve had a life changing diagnosis and you feel it all hit you like a wall of information.
I’d say don’t google. Google is not your friend and will scare you. Take the highs and the lows as you will have both. Try to just focus on the next step only… break it down k to little chunks to make it easier.
Be kind to yourself and confide in a close friend to help you.
You are going through an incredibly tough time and the waiting is the worst.
We are all here for you when it’s too much h or if you want any help.
You are brave and you will have the strength to ge through this xx
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Hi I know it’s is easy to say try not to worry but really do try and take it a day at a time. I was also diagnosed with grade 1 ductal,invasive 3 and half years ago had mri and ct scans lumpectomy and lymph node biopsy. Every time I went back to appointment there seemed to be something new to take in and read! It seems a long time ago now but you will get through it! I had radiotherapy and on tamoxifen now and living my best life - and so will you be soon be kind to yourself and good luck xx
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Hello
I’m sorry you find yourself here!
You sound very similar to be, I’m 44 and on the 2 June was diagnosed, mines also early stage but unfortunately there’s 3 areas and it’s in both breasts.
I’ve been told it’s early stage and I have the best combination of cancer (the most treatable) but doesn’t stop you worrying!
Luckily my mri was clear and I now have my treatment plan. Although still waiting on an operation date!
The one thing I’ve found has helped me is to simply let it go and stop worrying, stop looking too far ahead and trying to second guess the outcomes. I know easier said than done and some days it’s impossible.
My MRI was clear and I was given my treatment plan 2 weeks ago, at an appointment yesterday I was told of changes to the plan which threw me a bit.
My plan is to have a single mastectomy with reconstruction on my right and a lumpectomy on the left. I’m also having the lymph nodes removed on my right. Then radiotherapy and hormone blockers.
But I know there’s no point worrying over any of it because my plan could change again, I’ve had the BRCA gene test done and the results won’t be back before my operation so if that’s positive I’ll be facing further operations.
At the minute I’m trying to focus on getting my head round the operation, I didn’t quite expect such a big operation for such early stage cancer, but I’m just unlucky with the location of the cancers meaning there’s no option other than mastectomy and the fact that it’s bilateral.
But I’m trusting my team, I know they’re just doing the best to give me the best outcome.
I hope you get your mri results soon! x
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Thank you so much – really helpful to hear your detailed description of the general pathway most people follow. I’ve been told they’ll take a couple of lymph nodes to test when they do the lumpectomy, like you said.
I’m glad your lumpectomy went well and wish you all the best for the next stage.
Thank you so much for the resources suggestions, I really appreciate it. My kids are 12 and 9. I will definitely look into the Osborne trust.
Their dad is a good parent in general but he has terrible health anxiety so I fear he’s going to struggle to be a good source of support for them during this process (maybe I’m wrong, hope so). So I’m even more determined to give them the support and reassurance they need.
I’ll also look into the other charities you mentioned. My friends and family have been brilliant so far but I can also see sometimes it’s helpful to speak to a third party who’s not emotionally involved.
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Thank you, that’s really helpful to make sure I’m thinking of the current information I have in the right light, i.e. the pathway I’ve been told about is a working hypothesis which is subject to change depending on MRI results and then the pathology results after the surgery. Also good to know that the pathology is generally the ultimate information to trust.
Thanks for taking the time to explain x
Thank you for your kind words and wise advice about taking it a day at a time.
I’m definitely avoiding Google. I’m not generally a worrier but right now I know I’m susceptible to reading worrying stuff that will then echo round my brain at 3am when I can’t sleep.
I’m sorry you’re also going through this and wish you all the best x
Thank you for your kind message and I’m so glad to hear you’re out the other side and now living your best life! That’s the vision I’m holding onto for myself.
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I’m sorry to hear you’re also on this journey and that it’s turned out more complex than you originally hoped. It sounds like you’re in the hands of a good team.
I think you’re right about trying to let go of wanting to know what’s coming next and second guessing outcomes. I just got invited to an event in late October and found myself thinking, hmm, well if I have surgery mid-late September (as per provisional timeline) then I should be fine to attend!
Then I caught myself and realised I don’t have any way of knowing yet what I’ll be doing in October or how I’ll be feeling, so I need to just leave that idea aside and see how things go.
I hope you get a surgery date soon and I wish you all the best x
If they gave done biopsy they will know what grade it is. I was diagnosed with a 5mm tubular breast cancer grade 1 after a routine mammogram. I’ve now had lumpectomy and therapeutic mammoplasty with sentinel node biopsy. I have to go with what the experts tell me I get my results in 3 weeks. I’ve been in a very dark place with it all but confident I’ll get through it x try and be positive x
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