Hi everyone , hope you are all starting to feel a bit better today , think the fog is starting to lift today so might feel "Human " tomorrow !! Really strange feeling this time , was like my outer half was moving quicker than my insides 
tried explaining this to family and now they think I am officially insane , was wondering if anyone else had felt like that , or if maybe I am insane 
Love and hugs to everyone xxx
Just got emtional cos of Aleshas post. Arenāt people generally lovely. Very touching x
I am confused by your chemo Alesha! Sounds complicated - will blame the chemo brain! Mine is just 6 x FEC. Easy! Will have 15 x rads at the end. Will worry about that when I get there.
Ginger. I get you!! Describing it is hard. I always say itās a bit out of body!?
Hello all. I have my half way scan in the morning. I have to admit im finding it hard going now. I thought half way would feel great but it feels like i have to do it all again! Im really scared of changing to fec even though Docetaxel was not that nice and im sure my body wouldnt let anymore in after the reactions i had. I have a deep dull pain in my chest that is really hard to describe. I have had it every time so fairly sure its a se. It starts day 5-6ish. OH thinks its my nerves but wondered if anyone else had had it? Elizabeth is still donig so well and im so proud of her. I do feel like im missing so much. Its the first night i have been able to bath her tonight and im on day 14! On the up side the dogs came home yesterday so pleased to have them home even though they smell awful. They will need a bath asap. Its lovely to read everyones posts. Lots of love C
Alesha, your brother in law sounds just great. Go for it girl on the dance floor, Iād love to do the same sometime soon.
Doggirl, you do look great without hair, I think you could set a new trend. I found rads a doddle, worked full time at the time and just went after work, last one I had was Christmas Eve last year and I asked the nurses if I could put a plate of mince pies on my chest to warm up, thought this quite a practical suggestion.
Ginger1, I have that about 4 or 5 days after treatment. Itās just the chemo, the only other time I felt like it was when I was given mushoom coffee by a student friend - 25 years ago!
HarryDuck, think you are coping amazingly well, for me pets (2 cats) are a godsend. They are wonderful company and donāt know youāre ill.
Best wishes to all the May buddies.
Claire x
I am on line (again) as OH watching footie (sigh). Doggirl - what about before all this is over if we all agree to go out without wig/scarf etc?!! Would be really scarey. ā¦Not sure if I will delete this idea, but it is worth a thoughtā¦
Harry duck - I am not even half way through the docetxol, and I am having it with carboplatin but honestly overall I think its harder than the FEC. The worst thing about FEC is the immediate side-effects- not everyone even gets them but after the first week, it is then do-able. With the docetaxol, the last one took me the full 14 days to get over. It was foul. With the FEC, I was pretty much up and about as usual between day 7-10.
I know excatly how you feel, I havent even got to my third yet and wondering how on earth I will manage another fourā¦Break it down. It helps.
Ginger- you sound better. Good to hear. The whole experience is pretty crazy isnt it?! I freely admit to anyone that I am a bit mad!! I have been having to sit on the āpriority seats on the busā, usually its a matter of pride to sit on the top deck but I cant hold on as chest hurts too much. Feel very feeble - Alesha. Great to hear you can work flexibily. I am sure it helps you to feel ānormal.ā Them steriods againā¦
Rattles, xx
PS I love Coldplay - bet it was fab?
Pukey, pukey, puke-puke!!
Hi lovely ladies.
Zumba, I am so sorry to hear about your gran. I lost mine a few years ago and we were really close too, itās very hard and I Miss her very much and know she her cuddles would have helped through this. I hope she passed peacefully and that you are doing ok.
There have been 56 new post on here in the last few day since i logged on, blimey! For all those feeling crap and pukey, I hope you feel better very soon!
I have bounced back so much quicker this time without those stinky steroids, Iāve not felt sleepless or sicky, Iām actually going to try and go back to work next week for a few hours a day, yay. Canāt wait to see everyone and have a bit of normality.
Still getting tired but am doing loads. Today I have been building flat pack furniture, been food shopping and cooked my first ever tagine. Iāve got so much time on my hands Iām learning to cook, Iām sure tomorrow Iāll be pooped, but itās so nice on the good days, who cares!
Has anyone else wet shaved their head? I did mine yesterday so am shiny bald now, pass the lollipops, Jojak is in town! Itās odd but much better than tufts and hair everywhere. Iāve not been this bald since I was in the womb! How is everyone else coping with the baldness, apart from Doggirl who is rocking it and proud. You are awesome Mrs!
Hope our mascot is still sleeping soundly for her mummy Harry Duck.
Loads of love to all xx
Morning
I had a wet shave last week too! Got my OH to do it, felt very strange. It has started growing back to stubbly at the moment. Made me panic and think why did I shave it off? But OH said there are big bald patches and then I remembered my comb over man look the day I had it shaved off.
Sorry cannot remember everyones names who put on comments as by the time I look then go back to this page I have forgotten them. (steroids again) but yes Coldplay were brilliant.
I also agree about the out of body experience! Usually on the Sunday after chemo. It always seems the longest day ever that day and I have no concentration at all.
Alesha
Em - sorry you are sickā¦Hope you are feeling better?
Joise - you sound really upbeat and energetic. Nasty steriods.
I am bald too. Would not have a clue about how to upload (or is it download?) my picture. I hate having my photo taken at the best of times, and this is certainly not that. I thought mine was growing back Alesha but then had a massive shed and there is stubble everywhere - uugh.
I am off to see surgeon. Assume he will remove dressings. I am dreading the dressings coming off. When they are on, I can pretend its not there. Fingers crossed he will be happy with the healing. Also, seeing physio.
Rattles, x
Blimey josiejo you are on one! Am liking the sound of the cooking. Round yours for tea then?! Will bring a lollipop to go with your new head. I donāt really have much to wet shave off. Strangely have hair everywhere else. Seem tO have sideburns! Will not be shaving facial hair though seems a slippery slope!
Rattles I am contemplating your challenge. I do have a birthmark on the back of my head (stork Mark) which IMF not too sure about sharing. Maybe when a get a tan on my head? I e been taking off the scarves on (remote) dog walks. Now just need sun.
Thanks for the rads update Myfanwy. Iād heard theyāre not too bad. Inthink the worse think will be the travelling as not at my local hospital. Will have to go to Southampton, which is an hour away.
Love to Harryduck and Elizabeth. I hope you find FEC kinder xxx
Feeling good today , insides and outsides moving at the same time , the SEās are not nice but can be a bit confusing having SEās that no-one has mentioned before, and believe me I am easily confused ;), hope everyone is having a good day and not suffering too much .
Love and hugs to everyone xxx
Glad your inners and outers are catching up!
I have slept all day. Seems to be the only way to block it out is to curl up in a ball. Hugs to Emylou hope your pukey puke is passing x
Think that not having the steroids cuts out the manic stage I had. Almost a shame though as housework was right up together!
Sorry to hear some of you have had bad news and side effects. Have survived four days of work and 2 nights out! Very proud of myself and glad I went back but must admit I was seriously tired. Also had more bad ulcers and the doctor gave me Hydro cortisone pellets - which you place on the ulcer! Canāt figure out how to place it as they are on the side of the cheek! So you pop them in and they dissolve - well for a start they can last a 30 mile car journey and still be there. and the night before last put one in mouth before I went to sleep and it was still there in the morning! Has anyone else had these - or am I the guinea pig?
Take care everyone.
L x
Hello buddies, starting to feel a better 2 days after FEC3. Still no energy or appetite but at least not feeling or being sick. Get my daughter back tonight so glad Iām feeling better as she is our resident whirlwind and will no doubt be bursting with all the news of her trip to France!! Hope all you buddies are not suffering too much at the mo. How did your scan go HarryDuck? Iām glad Iāve had my last FEC but also dreading the TAX - which will be worse I wonderā¦? Take care all, Em X
Will be great to see your daughter Em and hear all about her adventures.
Kitten mad - its good to hear that some of the buddies have so much energy.
My turn for a low day, saw surgeon yāday and had dressings all off. Cried (in private) most of the evening. Surgeon said to put cream on, but not to look at it!! Of course what do you do when someone tells you not to look? Look of course. And it looks horrible. Really horrible.
Onc says I can start chemo again on Thursday - so that will be carboplatin and docetaxel no 3ā¦Wondering how I can manage another 4. Even he says I might only be able to manage 4, but then I will feel like I have failedā¦
Sorry for vent. Needed to get that off my chest (ha!)
Hope all the poorly buddies are feeling a bit better, a special mention for Polar Bear. Hope you are on the mend.
Rattlesx
Hi,
Harryduck - good that Elizabeth is doing so well, hope your scan was OK. FEC was not too bad for me - I was lucky and did not get the sickness but just had a few days of fatigue, dizzy spells, wobbly legs and mild upset stomach. One of the drugs - the cyclophosphamide - gives you a bit of a funny head feeling like sinusitus or when you eat wasabi as it goes in but this quickly passes especially when they flush it through with lots of saline afterwards.
Rattles - sending gentle hugs, do you have a nice breast care nurse you can talk to about how you feel after the op? Hope the rest of your chemo goes OK.
Em - pleased you are feeling better in time for your daughter coming home.
Hope everyone has an OK weekend and hope PolarBear is out of hospital soon.
I now have some velvety designer stubble appearing on my head - my hair is not sure whether it is coming or going at the moment as my eyebrows and eyelashes are thinning. Bought some false eyelashes which I have never worn before but scared to put them on as they look like giant spiders when I take my specs off!
Squeakymouse xx
Hi to all the buddies of May,
Rattles, love your posts. Iāve ordered a couple of things from the head gear website to. Also went to local charity shops for scarves today, so got the same look for a fraction of the price. Iām so sorry Rattles to hear of your grief, it is grief for what you came into the world with which has gone. I have one breast and recently (April) has a hysterectomy (canāt spell it) so all my female things have been removed, ok if that resulted in being free of BC but it does not. Still Iām very well and happy, donāt think we should be sad 'cause of BC, perhaps only the strong get it, the weak would perish, haho.
JosieJo75, very interested you thought steroids were a hindrance rather than a help. Might not take mine next time, well not straightaway, to see what happens. I didnāt shave my head, had to admire the follicles that have clung on, they must like me better than the chemo.
Doggirl, yes, Iām sure the time you have to travel for treatment makes a big difference. I only live 5 minutes away from my oncology unit so Iām lucky. I did make sure I put plenty of cream on my chest though during treatment. Iām sure you will be absolutely fine although the hour of travel is not the best.
Ginger1, hope you are ok. I have the odd SE which is unique to me but thankfully, passes in a day or so so but big hugs to you.
Kittenmad, mouth problems has always been one of my concerns with chemo, canāt think of anything more unpleasant and Iām sorry youāre having to go through this. May I just say I use a mouth wash called Retar Dex from Superdrug, very expensive at Ā£7 but I havenāt had a problem.
Emylou9, Iām having 6 lots of Taxol, Iāve had 2 so far and the next one is next Wednesday, my birthday, sods law, but I have to say the side effects have been very mild and I usually react to anything so Iām sure you will be fine.
To all the May buddies, big hugs.
Claire xx
Hi ladies, thank you for all the congrats on the birth of baby Henry, he is adorabubble, so tiny and he smells lush :-), my 3rd FEC was ok, had problem with cannula, first one didnāt work, it decided to go into a valve, which was a tad painful, so it was taken out and a different one put into another vein, all good fun ( not ), but turned out ok in the end, no sickness , bit of nausea, had bad hot flushes Wednesday night, and I am struggling to sleep, just so hot canāt get settled, heartburn has started today, got Gaviscon for that tho, wonderful stuff, tastes yummy too lol, well that will do for me moaning, hope everyone is feeling well, and SEās not too bad, hugs to all , take care, Toni xxx
Hi Darling Buds,
Was due FEC3 on the 18th, but still not had it. Onc has decided it is pointless waiting for linogram when already certain of results, so am having new PICC on Monday. It will then be a case of chemo unit trying to squeeze me in.
My heart goes out too everyone here, and all those not as lucky as we are to have each other.
Am keeping this short and sweet for now as usually end up loosng post when using my mobile to upload.
TTYL,
Hugs,
Merc
xxxx