Trish1968 i work in a kitchen I don’t no if your aware but when u go back to work which for me was a yr after rads I was not allowed to lift anything heavy we are covered by disabilty act because of node removed my onc told me was happy for me to go back to work but no lifting and was concerned about heat don’t no if u are aware of this I just thought I’d mention it as sch work is v heavy tc Laura
This time last week I was waking up and very shaky from my mx and recon. Still had oxygen, still using bed pan.
A nurse asked how long I’d been I’ll (does anyone else have problem with the concept of being I’ll when, treatments aside, you fee well?)
“I was dx in nov”
“oh,” said Nurse with a sympathetic look, “yes, well… We’ve had our troubles too - my Mum died of cancer th-”
I stopped the conversation right there asking "do I need to know this?’
Nurse looked a bit surprised but said no more.
I think sometimes people try to make conversation about cancer in the same way you do about holidays:
‘Paris? Yeah, been there - rained everyday.’
‘cancer? Yeah, friend had it - died.’
!!!
Stay calm - Elderly neighbour mine “Oh, Florence down the road’s alsatian had cancer, had to be put down”
??? What is he suggesting there? 
Guess what my response was? “Well rather it than me”
He looked shocked!
Kat - think that’s worse!! Can you believe it?
I find myself laughing but it’s not funny!
Would a different dog type been less insulting?
Kat - think that’s worse!! Can you believe it?
I find myself laughing but it’s not funny!
Would a different dog type been less insulting?
El K, I think I need to buy some tenalady, I laughed so hard at that one, and SCACO’s question had me absolutely screeching!
SCACO, great response to the nurse, and I am so glad you were able to make her think.
You’re completely right about the holiday conversation, the sort of thing you get at a hairdresser’s. I felt at my first chemo session that I was expected to make small-talk, when all I really wanted to do was run away and cry. I couldn’t run away so I just cried. Nursey was rather shocked, and it just made her babble even more! (I have apologised to her since for making her feel bad…)
lol… as if my eyes aren’t watering enough, you lot have really made me laugh this morning, and now instead of tears of mucotosis its tears of laughter!! Good job we can laugh at ourselves isn’t it. Happy weekend girls, big kisses
Lizzy xx
my husband insists on saying " ah grasshopper" in bad bad chinese accent at times, he thinks its hilarious. good job i have sense of humour
I really wish that people would stop giving me diet advice. I was on the phone to a friend last night and she listed all the things she thought I should avoid and then there was a long deep silence when I said ‘I’ve been eating what would be described as the best ‘anti-cancer’ diet for almost 30 years and I still got it, do you think it’ll make a difference now???’
grrr, yes the alternative bit gets me too. I was talking to a group of poeple up at court to arrange them to cover the days I had to miss for my op when a magistrate i hardly know urged me to read a book on diet written by some monk who’s tumors spontaneously disappeared. I did not lie and say i would read it but made—mmm very interesting noises.
he then sent me an email with a link to the book and urged me to open my mind to new ideas buy it and try this diet because the man could help me
I sent him a polite email back saying I had already found someone to make my tumor spontaneously disappear—my surgeon.
I did not get a reply and wonder what he will say when I next see him.
OAL - aren’t people annoying. When people say stuff like that I always want to ask them if they’d put their trust in a diet to shrink a tumour or opt for surgery to remove it straight away. It’s so easy for people who haven’t had cancer to pass on all this rubbish; they’ve never had to face what we’ve been through.
My mum forwarded on to me an e-mail about asparagus and cancer. You were supposed to eat 4 tablespoons of pureed asparagus twice a day to be completely cured. A quick google of asparagus and cancer revealed it to be an urban legend and the eminent doctor quoted not to exist. Why do people think there are miracle cures out there?
“instead of tears of mucotosis its tears of laughter”
Brilliant comment only a BC-er would make!!
Yep, I’ve had the “read this, it’s about what to do to prevent cancer” thing from a person I KNEW would start bossing me about so I hadn’t told her, someone else did after expressly asked not to. The letter I sent back with the unread book I hope has got the message across. Basically my reply was, “too bleedin’ late!”
Scoco - Its a good job most of the time I’m not sensitive 
I’m a “proper northern lass” in that respect.
I also have a very black sense of humour, so stunned as I was, I was amused at what a ridiculous thing to say to someone, like something out of a film
Hilarious really.
I just love coming on here, I never cease to be amazed at the crap that seems to come out of “well meaning” peoples mouths.
SCACO, your comment about the cancer being like your holidays being discussed is so true! If I here one more person tell me that there aunts, hampster, neighbours, lodger has cancer and has survived I will SCREAM!!! LOL
Reading all ur comments has really made me laugh & they’re so true. I’ve only been diagnosed just over a week but i’ve never had so many comments about peoples relatives etc & their cancers. “So & so had it & they’re ok” & if i hear Kylies name mentioned one more time i’m gonna scream. They obviously don’t realise there’s more than one type of cancer & more than one type of treatment. At the moment i just smile & nod but not sure how long that will last before i say something i might regret,lol x
I popped into work last week to see the kids and my head about how to be phased in back to work when I’m ready. After I stayed and had my lunch with the rest of the staff. And the conversation turned to neighbour, friend, aunty, etc who was ok, so you will be, at one point couldn’t take any more, so I said, “thats lovely, but I’m tn and I have a high chance of it all being back in 3 yrs and that could be it” that shut them up, except one who looked and said " oh that really is bo***cks" which I thought was a lovely reply .
Yesterday I saw friend we are going on holiday with later in the year. She has been to the place before and was describing the zip wire that goes through the tree tops. I said it sounded great but I wasn’t sure I’d be able to hang from a wire after my op. Her reply ‘you’ll be fine’. On what does she base this? It pulls where my scar is if I straighten my arm fully above my head.
"On what does she base this? "
On bo**ocks, It sounds like!